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Celebrating a 9 Year Cycle

The month of October is a big month for us for celebrations and honoring, including our anniversary, Dave’s birthday, Cosmo’s transition, when we moved into the Magick Bus and began our RV adventure leaving behind everything, when I sold my amazing Hunab Ku Toyota Highlander Hybrid that took me on many an adventure safely, a month of cherished friends’ birthdays and transitions, and our moving back to our home in Lake Tahoe. I’ll be sharing a bit more of some of these as the days go on, but today is a day I want to give some words to, as it marks a 9 year cycle for us together that closes a chapter on our lives and opens a new one.

Today is our anniversary of coming together and although we experienced years of mixed challenge that likely could have taken us a different direction many times, we find ourselves continuing together, stronger than ever.

I know that many fantasize and hope or intend for their version of ideal in a relationship….the movie screen romance….that state of constant bliss…..or some idea of “spiritual” perfection….Why? Because I’ve heard it from many, I see it in things people share online, and because I have been there.

But I’ve found that it is the relationships that take you through every nook and cranny of your heart and soul, to the depths of challenge and to the shadows of personal reflection at the core, which truly create richness, fulfillment, and solidity, individually and as a partnership.

You don’t have to live this “spiritual ideal” of a life to have and share a beautiful relationship. In fact, I know of many and see many “spiritual” people who move through more partners than the world of celebrities do. Nothing wrong with that, of course, as we do change and so change can constitute moving on when that becomes necessary to one’s personal growth and well being. And there is no one way relationships need to look or be and yet, it is curious to me in the stories I’ve heard and in my own years of experience with this, how spiritual ego can sometimes overlook the beauty and gift the challenges are reflecting that may in fact bring us closer to our relationship to ourselves and All That Is, if we are willing to go as far and as deep as the relationship is asking of us. Sometimes we stop before we get there, much as we give up on dreams or intentions we’ve been working on right when we needed to just go that extra mile and it would happen.

That’s not to say that every relationship is meant to last, nor should it, but each one is opportunity for utmost vulnerability and transparency so that we may journey to ever-greater personal integrity and grace of being.

Some connections can be past life or beyond intensified to help us to move through things, clear and heal soul patterns, or are there to simply recognize for what they are, but aren’t necessarily ones for the “now” to move forward with.

Some souls simply can’t meet us at that level of commitment and responsibility that it will take to get there, but there are many that can, will, and do rise to the occasion, if we are doing our work just as much as we desire them to do theirs. The key being, doing OUR work and not trying to change the other person or force them to do what we ourselves cannot. Walking the walk will produce the most authentic experiences of either them meeting us at that bridge, or making the choice that it’s just too much and not for them.

And this is where I’ve found myself in gratitude of this relationship I share with Dave. We’ve been at many crossroads during our times together and yet each time it asked of me/us to go deeper and further, we eventually did. It didn’t happen easily or overnight, especially in the beginning, as we both came together at times of huge personal transformation we met each other with, which yanked us hard in many directions and had us exploring everything to its depths individually and together.

What I found, however, is that when I was willing to look most vulnerably and responsibly at myself and walk the walk in every way, that was the ultimate game-changer.

I share this, as I feel it is important for us to understand that everything in life now asks of these things from us consistently across the board. If we want a particular “anything” then we must be willing to go to the depths of our core most honestly and with the greatest level of conscious responsibility we can muster up in every new moment.

I want to honor and celebrate what has been an incredible 9 year journey with Dave and it feels like we are at another precipice of possibility taking place right now.

We’ve been through The Tower, The Devil, The Hanged Man, The Death, The Fool cards….you name it and I feel as if The Star and The World cards are coming into being now. The last couple of years really shifted things into several octaves higher for sure when together we took leaps into the unknown of individual and shared journeys of the heart.

Next Friday, the 27th will celebrate Dave’s first breath on Earth, this go around, but it is every day and every timeless moment he’s cherished and celebrated.

Equally so is today, the 22nd, cherished and celebrated as the moment we decided in spirit upon changing our lives forever and ending the repetitive patterns we both had experienced. The moment somewhere in our heart and soul did a part of us know this would be our chance to go beyond….our chance to change everything….and our knowingness on a spirit level that if it wasn’t now and with this opportunity within each of us, it might never be. It wouldn’t be easy and it wouldn’t be bliss, but it would be possible depending upon how much our souls had had enough.

We’ve been through it all, the worst and the best, the challenge and the flow, yet we never gave up, embraced the mirror we reflected to each other to transmute within ourselves, didn’t listen to what others thought, and instead paved our own way through life and with each other – our efforts showering us with gifts in abundance.

But no other adventure has been grander than these last two years, as we jumped together into the great outdoors to discover the depths of ourselves and our bond by turning things inside out and upside down, revealing the root of love’s true power to create miracles.

Dave literally saved my life last year and believed and nurtured me to follow my dreams and step into the most empowered embodiment of my essence I have ever been.

I’ve loved watching him blossom and reveal more of who he really is….the deep thinker, the adventurer, the silly playful child, the lover of nature and protector of animals, the poet, the creative, the sensitive, the passionate, the intellectual, the generous giver, the tender, the strong, the one who has been able to help me grow the most by challenging me with everything I need and helping me to finally find that peaceful balance.

That’s what a true, loving partner is.

It is pretty amazing, but no wonder that we are celebrating this ending and beginning of a cycle with our new dream home coming into manifestation, which we closed on two days before October – bringing another thing into celebration for this month, as we also just began our remodeling in the last couple of weeks.

It’s an incredible journey for sure, and I know the best times are now and yet to come, as we have both individually and together, worked through the biggest hurdles of this lifetime and are now ready to embark on a completely new reset of creations and experiences that only hinge on the now and focus on a whole new and unknown future.

Here’s to making more exciting memories on the next adventure we’re embarking on.

I’m grateful for this day when we both decided to show up, stand up, rise to the occasion, and say no more, I’m ready to go the length and do what ever it takes, I’m ready to be all that I can be, I’m ready to create a new reality, and I’m in, all the way.

dave and tania.jpg

Capricorn Full Moon Insights

This Full Moon has a special place in my heart because of its being in Capricorn…an energy I’ve been working on diligently since my North Node, Ascendant and Mars are all in Capricorn. For me it speaks to the life shifts I’m integrating, but it also speaks to a collective energy needed, especially with healers, empaths, “light workers” (as people call them), creatives…or anyone who has lived in martyr or victim roles most of their life. This Full Moon in Capricorn speaks to fortifying those personal boundaries and creating healthier relationships with others in all ways, including the relationship you have with yourself, the past, and the ancestral lines you carry within your DNA.


I’m reminded of Astrid with this Full Moon and how she, too, is mirroring this shift like mom and the collective, into deepening of her true power, as she heals from the past, understands the triggers that bring her to defense, and roots more in the trust of self and the love she consistently now has to support her into her empowered wholeness, so she can blossom like crazy.

This is a time for keeping ultra present and aware of rising and displaced and exaggerated emotions, anger, jealousy, fear….if you’re feeling triggered look within yourself as to what that’s really about and what you’re really upset with. It’s very easy to point fingers and lay blame on others and it’s very easy to self-sabotage so that we can avoid the things that would be most supportive for our journey, but scary to entertain.

Reactions are not only likely unconscious fears acting out, but also aren’t based on the reality being put forth even by the other person triggering you because they have their own stories that shape the way they are acting as well.

This again is shadow work…something everyone likes to talk about, but very few truly understand and are actually working with.

If something has been hidden in your life by yourself or others, the Full Moon can help shed truth on the matter, but be willing to embrace that revealing when it shows up, otherwise greater lashing out and reactions will only continue to mask what’s really at the core of things.

Take steps back, spend more quiet time, or time in nature to root and ground yourself more, recharge with the plants and trees, and remove yourself if necessary from harmful or potentially harmful situations until you have a better grip on things and your defensive emotions.

You can either give away your power or be empowered. It’s up to you.

The old is continuing to crumble and Capricorn assists you in taking greater responsibility in your life, rather than displacing that and continuing with old patterns that are no longer sustainable for ultimate, collective well being.

Capricorn also represents structure and so we’ll be asked to rework and rebuild new structures that are strong, yet flexible, and do not carry the load of the past with it.

So yes, transformational shifts on large scales are happening, which includes literal and symbolic deaths of everything we’ve ever known in order to be more authentic and in alignment with current frequencies.

I recently just finished a big 2 week fast and cleanse that was literally like shedding layers of snake skin in not only losing all the old in weight, but also reinvigorating my cells on a molecular level so that they had time to detox and dispel, rest, and then rebuild.

This is what we are going to see more of and what this Full Moon is illuminating a need within us to do whether we like it or not.

You must tear down the old foundations in order to truly build a fortified new.

Power is increasingly being something to exercise with utmost consciousness and to balance in ways that both leave us empowered, but also empower others rather than power over others or have us acting out of inauthentic power.

Goats are amazingly agile, versatile, curious, and inventive, have incredible balance, are committed to the journey, are patient and persevering, don’t let any obstacle stand in their way of continuing toward their goals, keep climbing and reaching for new heights no matter what (even if its outside their comfort zone), know how to nurture and feed the soul, are intuitively guided, and exercise wise use of trust and responsible independence.

Let us learn by Goat’s example and ride this transformative energy with greater awareness.


Support & Perspective for Those of You Have Chosen a Different Way

I don’t get involved in the energetic dynamics at work in the world right now like others do, remaining mostly silent in words but loud in frequency, and that might be judged by some, thought to be a misuse of my freedoms, completely denied as valid to how I go about things, or simply that I’m crazy and ignorant. To all of that I smile and hold my position even stronger. I don’t attempt to hold answers, nor to judge others for their own positions. And mostly I find myself working with energy when others engage their conversations, or may present questions to invite curiosity, which engages the creative powers and activates something deeper and latent within.

Today two interesting posts popped up that I feel guided to combine some pieces of the shares and my comments on, in case anyone has interest in “some” of my perspective or feels similar and unsure of themselves, their own choices’ value, or feel alone out there in the Middle and Void.

I’ll begin with an interesting observation that I’ve linked in direct manifestation to things, which I’ve been seeing since yesterday morning. We live way high up at the top of the mountain and so the perspective here offers amazing reflections.

I shared on Facebook yesterday and this morning about a very interesting veil of clouds that has been here since yesterday morning and feels symbolically reflective for sure. I shared about it along with photos of the clouds and the volcanic sunset before they arrived, and the surreal almost neon sky here last evening.

This is what I shared this morning in reflection:

“Wow, incredibly the cloud veil that began yesterday morning covering all of Lake Tahoe and the lower basin area still remains this morning without a budge. The only shift was mid-day yesterday when it started to rise up a bit creating what looked like a perfect wall or screen…then it went back down. and all through the night last night, once the stars came out, the cloud veil was lit up without any light source, as if like star glow and cosmic phosphorescence was emanating from it. So mysterious! Being way up here to witness it is amazing and creates like two worlds. It’s like the lake is incubating and morphing below that veil. Also interesting that the deep waters are below the cloud coverage, as if asking one to look beyond all illusions and reach courageously into one’s depths to the core. Truly nothing is as it seems…it’s not what you see on the surface. Let’s find the strength and vulnerability to go within and understand the truth of what we’re being presented that gives rise to so much immediate reaction. Let’s find our center so we can respond from a place of greater understanding and peace.”

Interestingly Laura posted a blog article today mentioning “looking beyond the veil” and about taking “conscious empowered action” toward the world you want to create.

My comment there not only addresses the current scene people are focused on right now, but truly is intended as a bigger picture life perspective of working with opposites, triggers, and creating the new, as I never just focus on one detail taking place, but a bigger picture symbolism for things playing out.

Some of my comment included this below, along with sharing about the cloud veil I already posted above:

“Nearly everyone I know I’ve found to be divided and taking sides, others confused how to hold their energy that don’t want to be on either side and that see beyond both, and those taking stands with others to be a part of things…but what I haven’t seen is consistency with those desires for change carried through in life aside from moments of joining the group or getting triggered, as in fueling the energy in really effective ways or anyone out there providing constructive ideas and channels for people to fuel their rage and passions so it doesn’t turn into Civil War or worse…all very interesting and for myself, I am compelled to keep consistently firm in my position no matter what people think of me or not understanding the steps I’m taking because they don’t look like their idea of taking a stand.”

Her response:

“I agree, that veil of clouds is highly symbolic. I also this morning kept hearing “The Cloud of Unknowing,” which is the title of a Medieval Christian mystic text. Wikipedia summarizes the main gist this way:

“The underlying message of this work suggests that the way to know God is to abandon consideration of God’s particular activities and attributes, and be courageous enough to surrender one’s mind and ego to the realm of ‘unknowing,’ at which point one may begin to glimpse the nature of God.”

Given all the external focus on division among different religions and again, the provocations to war from BOTH sides, this seems like a wise time to step back, get quiet, clear the field of any and all interference, and reconnect with Spirit. When in doubt, choose peace. At least until you’re sure something is worth fighting for…”

And earlier this morning I received notification that someone liked a comment of mine synchronously “out of the blue” from an old post of Laura’s from 2014 titled Integration Lifetimes and the Splitting of the Worlds – one of my favorites of hers and SO reflective and synchronous with all of this.

Not only does it describe how we all have different paths and focuses in this life, but shares how each way we are called to “rise to action” will also be different. Not to mention the subject matter of separation and integration being so timely for now as well.

I didn’t know until she posted that blog that she’d used one of my own ways of working with the Shadow as one example. And so for those of you who think there is just one way, or may not understand how I am taking my own very deliberate and challenging path with this, here’s what she shared, which includes some perspectives beyond just my own experience that you may find valuable for these times:

“Healing for those on an Integration Lifetime is not so much about removal, as it is about conscious Creation. Sometimes Creation involves a carving away — like sculpting — but that carving away does not become an end in itself. Rather, the carving away exists as a step, perhaps many, many steps, in service to a greater vision, inspiration and spontaneous engagement with the material. Carving reveals Shadows, as greater depth encourages the play of light and dark, but the whole of Creation eventually reveals itself as far more than the sum of its individual cuts. An artist adds something with each taking away, infusing the Creation with life force energy until that Creation can hold its own.

I believe the third option of which Inelia speaks has begun to hint at its arrival, because enough people on Integration Lifetimes have come far enough on their individual journeys to open space for something beyond the Void. Old tugs to the familiar remain, but continued Shadow Work coupled with active, conscious Creation in both the imagination and in tangible ways — will continue to gestate this new option until the birthing time.

Different people engage Shadows in different ways. My dear friend and sweet faery twin, Tania Marie prefers not to work as an activist exposing wrongs or fighting for rights, but she’s got a body full of extremely potent, powerful, deliberate, beautiful and what some people have even called “scary” tattoos. She’s got a dragon, snakes, and jaguars, occult symbols, Moon goddesses, and ancient languages all in black, black, black ink all over her body. That’s a lot of intensity, money and pain, which she wears in indelible ink as an unapologetic reclamation of the power, Shadow projections, and often corrupted goodness attached to all these things. Embodying the Shadow literally on her body allows Tania to live her life with innocence and childlike wonder while still honoring the vastness and power of her being. Her book, Spiritual Skin, helps others to explore a similar path.

Tattoos are widely popular right now, but not for everyone. Some people invoke and integrate their Shadows by embracing whatever taboos have most defined their lives. Others move through various Archetypes and roles. Others attract life threatening illness or injury, which makes them reconcile with their own mortality. Since we all die at some point, this last version of Shadow Work opens itself to everyone — even those not on a full Integration Lifetime. Inelia has noted that “Gaia (Earth/Terra) has actively been pushing for a physical separation that is done through time, three generations, and is trauma free and gentle.” Those on Integration Lifetimes tend to feel deeply connected to Terra and tend to be the ones walking a fine line with awareness of this unsustainable civilization and way of life crumbling to its core (scary Shadow stuff!) and the joy, freedom and excitement of creating and welcoming the new.

As more and more Integration Lifetime folks move through their own process of dis-integration and learning to accept the Void, the human frequency on this planet continues to rise and offer encouragement for entirely new ways of being. We can reclaim the best of the old and the new, while consciously finding ways to integrate the pain, darkness and fear boiling to the surface of collective consensus reality. Energy adepts know that energy is energy, so we can mitigate the need for drastic physical events like pandemics and devastating tsunamis by exploring their energy signatures and finding different ways to rearrange and morph the energy. Kind of like radical feng shui!

Those who’ve already journeyed through the Void might find their skills and experiences increasingly welcomed as we redecorate and remodel reality, as the awakening masses begin to ask, “OK, we see it, but what the heck are we supposed to do with all this stuff????” The splitting of the worlds option gets rid of it, along with a whole lot of the material world. The integration option might involve some decluttering, but it doesn’t necessarily mean gutting. Think “re-purposing” or making art from junk, beauty from the discordant, healing from pain. The collective has not decided on a path yet, but individuals will each make their own choice. Collective consensus reality just means the tipping point of people with relatively aligned choices. If you suspect you’re on an Integration Lifetime and have been hammering the “positive” button, I’d simply encourage you to use this time delay to make sure you won’t be bored with your selection. Red pill, blue pill. Why take any pill? Or maybe you want a purple one. Maybe you want a world beyond pills.

Collectively, we’re in the Void right now, which means we wait. We can drive ourselves crazy with the waiting game, or we can use the extra linear time to explore and begin to create all sorts of worlds before we fully move into the new. You know what they say: “Yesterday is history, tomorrow’s a mystery, but today’s a gift. That’s why they call it ‘the present.’”

Timely then and timely now….and that Void she speaks of is right in front of me as I share this, with this huge cloud veil still covering the entire lower Tahoe basin area from where I sit.

Part of my response to Laura’s post, which someone liked today, included this:

“I know this is so true for me, as I have no desire to, or can’t engage in, many of the things that I see others around me getting so much out of in their own lives. I know that it is perfect for them, but it doesn’t feel aligned with or right for me and leaves me hugely unsatisfied and gaining nothing from it. That’s why people are surprised to learn that I don’t engage in certain things they would “think” I should be, based on ideas of what people have about a certain way of being. I’ve carved out a way and things that work for me and I’m not afraid to be different since I know its for the highest good to follow my intuition.

Remember, you are not someone else. So choose accordingly to your vibrational frequency.”

For anyone who thinks that my choice of action is an easy out, cowardly, etc…..I thank you for your opinion and don’t wish upon you to go through what I do and have, but as with anything, until we’ve walked in someone’s footsteps and tried on their “skin” for a while, these remain as one perspective judgment, rather than truth.

I share this post because I receive A LOT of messages all the time from people/clients/friends wanting advice, are confused, feeling helpless, invalidated, doubting themselves, and wondering about how I handle things, how I address people if they ask me questions (which never happens except rarely with family and those closest to me), what I’m doing in my own life to work with the energies, and simply wanting to understand something that, for empaths especially, can be all too distressing and in some cases debilitating to feel in the middle.

You are not alone. You matter. Your choices are valuable and needed. Trust what’s in your heart. Your position and consistent action in your life of embodying it, IS creating change.

With Love and Creative Magick

From Inside the Darkness by Martha Beck

This is a good explanation and perspective of the shadow work available to the collective that I wrote about in my blog on the state of things…. It’s not simply about choosing love and light and pulling to the other side, as that only creates more separation, opposites that evoke defense, and cognitive dissonance. To truly love, one must look to where these things that trigger us so much are within us (likely more unconscious), where they stem from if even just conditioned, in your DNA, in the collective as a whole, and the old you ran away from or turned your back on, and to work with that and embrace it in order to transmute it. Otherwise it will just crop up again in another form.

Spiritual bypassing is not the answer.

And let me assure you that there is collective unconscious shadow work on either side of the coin that’s not addressed in this post. It just seems that one appears or feels more obvious.

Nothing is a one sided experience.

There is unconscious shadow stuff running the show all around us, and is the reason that some ask why they can’t manifest certain things or in general.

My guess is as a collective we chose the more obvious as to help us potentially move through this work finally, otherwise it could continue working under the surface and create further challenge.

The way through is to go through it with eyes, ears, mind, heart, and soul wide open.

Thanks to my good friend Kate for sharing this post, as I think it might provide additional insight and support for people:

From Inside the Darkness by Martha Beck

The Shadow Brought to Light


In the midst of so much confusion, shock, anger, sadness, pain, and fear swirling around like a cesspool of toxicity, I think some reminders of the beauty and potential around us are in order, which is found within the chaos and both the light and the dark inherently, not to mention some reminders on what all of this truly reflects for us. I have experienced absolutely no shock, absolutely no fear, and a huge reiteration slap of how the collective has had zero focus on shadow work. I haven’t spoken about the election, nor will I get into specifics now, as my path and mission is to focus on things differently, but I will VERY briefly address what I feel and see dynamically.

I shared some of this on Laura’s blog post in response to the election, as a comment, when she posted her own mirroring thoughts. She and I and others have been speaking, sharing, and writing about the importance of the shadow and embrace of both the light AND the dark for a long time.


I’m constantly finding more layers of it to work on within myself as well, but I will share AGAIN that it is absolutely crucial and cannot be bypassed. And that goes for EVERYONE…spiritually focused in love and light, or not. There’s been much denial across the board and spiritual bypassing.


What ever shows up is exactly what is needed.

Change will happen, one way or another, with us on board or not. The reflections and triggers will only increase so if we want the changes then DO something about it.

Complaining or utilizing energy to point fingers and accusations is a waste of that energy and time.


Let’s fuel it into productive ways to embody and create that which we want and to empower ourselves.

All the energy I felt and heard from others about the election was just crazy and continues.


While I fully understand on all the different levels where this stems from and the legitimate reasons for the upset and fears, I also feel that it’s time to back up our words since actions speak louder and it’s time to look at what our fears share with us and what our anger is truly about.


It’s also time to look past the surface. We can’t avoid diving deep anymore.

I do believe that a collective shift on a more dramatic potential scale did take place, despite what it seems. I emphasize, “POTENTIAL”.


I feel that a last minute twist took hold and the collective shadow pulled out a whopping anger and manifestation of repressed, old stuff that won’t be ignored any longer, and hit us over the head to wake everyone up, which surpassed what seemed to be a next transition along the dynamics line or any kind of behind the scenes agenda people speak about.


And that is NOT a bad thing.

It may feel really icky and uncomfortable, but heck, if we won’t listen any other way, maybe that deep discomfort or fear is the way we will?

And surprises could be in store in more ways than we imagine that aren’t tied to any one person, but what collectively could be sparked by all of this.


I don’t know what the collective’s threshold is, but it’s obvious we’ve reached or neared it and I keep saying, it sure would be better to do something while there’s that opportunity before it gets even worse…because, oh yes, it can get worse.


Or, this could be the tipping point.

That’s up to us as a collective.


I don’t promote fear and so my saying this is not to do that, but to see with different eyes and from new perspectives, and to encourage you to utilize the gifts and power you have. Not, to continue in the same veins and to give away your creative power.

Perhaps a shock to the system is the way of awakening latent DNA to know who you really are.

As we have yet to understand even a fraction of that divine grace and inherent power and beauty.

Nature has been messaging us, and since we don’t listen to Her, increasingly other avenues that DO get our attention ARE.

There is so much yet untapped into…the creative pools await your diving in and imagining with passionate vision and action to back it up.

A leap shift is available as the potential ability to present opportunity for the collective to create major and lasting change by seeing past the surface.

The key being, again, focus on the self and what these things are reflecting.


Where are we hiding and playing charades from the truth within?

It’s so obvious if we want to see it.


“Nothing ever goes away until it has taught us what we need to know.” ~Pema Chodron

I think that by focusing on ways to embody and cultivate the things we love in a way that honors this gift of life and by consistently, with committed passion, using our energy in active ways that create reflections of our values, we’d find our experience of, and response to, life and what life throws us to be tempered with harmony just as consistently and with a greater understanding of the natural cycle of all things.


I hope you enjoy these beautiful images of our time recently at Eagle Lake and Eagle Falls….seems symbolic of our country’s symbol with the name “Eagle” and these photos seem to capture a shining of light on the truth within the shadows and dark and how the dark presents the opportunity to know the light when we transmute it.


Wishing everyone peaceful balance and harmony within to help create that balance without.



Such a great update from Lee that so resonates with my own observations. Yes, magick is breaking through with the alchemy of these intense times if we embrace the opportunity for transmutation. I’ve been observing that all of what has exploded to the surface is unfortunately, but never too late, the process we chose since nothing else seemed to get our attention. Everything is and will rise to the surface blatantly in our faces that has either been hidden from us, or that we’ve been hiding from.

The volcano was inevitably going to fully erupt, as denial, turning a blind eye, abuse of all that is sacred, and blame was not going to last forever.

Now is the time to let in the light, by walking with full conscious awareness through the shadow.

As Lee asks:

How are you going to play the game differently?

The Shadow of Our Truth ~ We Are Both of the Dark & the Light

20161020_170006_resized.jpgWe are both of the dark and the light…we are their alchemical transmutation. When we remember and walk responsibly through the shadow of our truth, we recognize and embody the brilliance of our creative power.


We often are focused on searching for the light, and yet the mysterious magnitude and beauty is in walking the recognition of our complexity within the cosmic abyss of our consciousness in totality.


Every time I see amazing displays of light around me and the environment I find myself in, I realize it is only because I am embracing the dance with shadow and understanding its immeasurable potential, that these experiences and appearances are possible.


And in return, they are reflecting that message if in fact we don’t realize this.


It is how we responsibly utilize these energies that becomes the focus and creates the challenge we are here to harness with intentful awareness every step of the way so as not to duplicate recurrences of our past, but to align us with future expansive probabilities through the presence of all-encompassing consciousness now.


“In order for the light to shine so brightly, the darkness must be present.” ~Francis Bacon


The Quiet Strength within the Loud Storm ~ Lee Harris Energy Update

I think this energy update from Lee Harris will ring in for some of you. I definitely am experiencing the rapid transformation he speaks about, along with the recalibration being in full effect for sure. I’ve also experienced a retrieval of a new depth of inner strength by pulling within and that’s come with the shedding of more layers and facing shadow forces at work in very dramatic ways. It’s taken a lot out of me recently to continue holding my personal frequency amidst everything, but hold I am and figuring out ways to nurture my needs along the way to keep strong and vibrant.

Lee also provides some key points that are addressed in the video, along with some self care tips:

* August will have a Quiet Intensity – you will be most balanced and find an inner strength if you find ways to pull back from the outer intensity.

* Fast releasing of Inner-Shadows – the personal mirror of the collective revealing/releasing of shadows will have the same effect on you – your thoughts, beliefs and emotions.

* This speed of change can create disorientation or confusion – this is normal in short phases so let it be. You are just recalibrating and becoming ‘new’.

* Don’t judge yourself for having dips or downward moments – let them be there without judgement and they will pass at rapid speed.

* Notice you are becoming hyper-aware at what does and doesn’t work for you now. You will change patterns based on what you notice.

* If you like following others, or being the empath who lets others lead, that is changing fast. Time for you to experiment with self-leadership! You can’t make a mistake – just choices that you can change if they don’t work the way you thought you might.

Self-care tips:

* If you’re down, don’t get hard on yourself for it. Just let yourself be low for a moment and remind yourself it will pass.

* Isolation can be healing until it isn’t. Balance your alone-time with well chosen community moments with supportive people and environments.

* Develop a practice of doing something good for yourself every day: Exercise, a walk in the garden, meditation, listening to music with eyes closed. A moment where you step out of the world and be with you.

* Set Goals/Intentions – this moves energy in a forward direction.

* Keep a Daily Gratitude Journal – this helps you be present to the blessings in your life, and more aligned with the now and abundant in the future as a result.


Honoring the Goose Within Me


So, this was just too synchronous and fun not to share, as it goes along with yesterday’s post: Sacred Geese ~ Guiding Us Through the Cycles of Life

Just a few hours after I posted about the symbolism of geese yesterday and their meaning in my own life, we met Dave’s brother, wife, and daughter Violet whom you may remember from my ballet post: Dancing My Way To A Rebirthing Of The Light, after which we took them to the lake for a quick walk before they headed back south and home.

Two deer again showed up, I’ve now seen 15 in the same spot on three different occasions – today’s were prancing about a field next to two horses, which was super cool to see.

Deer help us to walk the path of gentleness, unconditional love, compassion, and to be in the presence of wonder, sensitivity and grace in all we do. Being with the horses felt extra potent, infusing deer’s gentleness and grace with the power, strength, and freedom of horse.

Yes, it is about gentle power. One does not have to be harsh to be empowered and voice yourself, your truth, and your boundaries.

Yet it was at the lake that the funny thing took place (and when I say funny I mean it was just so deliberately perfect and synchronous I had to laugh inside), which felt directly connected to my having spent time reflecting on geese and feeling their importance in my life.

The second I got out of the car after we parked, I heard the geese loudly honking.

And as I walked to the back of the car I then saw a geese couple at the end of driveway making their way over.


This was a different couple than I had photographed the last time (and that you see in my post from yesterday). The previous couple was gray and very calm, other than the honking.

This couple was ivory, white, and brown and full of energy. They were much more active and displaying the need for action in life, once you receive the message and understanding.

So the previous couple had been the first indication of message and this couple was now the ones to drive it home with “oomph!”

Both had been quite incessant with their communicating, but this couple came quickly towards me, as if on a mission. They weren’t afraid to take action – hint, hint! Action speaks louder than words. 😉

Everyone else had gotten out of the car by now, as these two geese (a male and female) were only about five feet away at this point.

The male seemed very protective of the female, as they do watch out for their own. He displayed a lot of affection with her as well and I was completely absorbed with them and all of their behaviors, especially after having written about them in the morning.


It may also be that breeding season is approaching, as I also did see one species of duck mount another in the water the same day. Lol!

So there also seemed to be a theme around partnership, couples, and communion being messaged – a lot around teamwork, communication, and compassion being key – big yes! as we had just discussed this around challenges people we knew having and were reflecting on how we have continually and diligently worked on this ourselves and how grateful we were that we had the ability now to be effective with communication that we once did not.

Our conversation made us appreciate what we had, whereas so many have a huge challenge in this department.

(In the photos below you can see the two ducks I was referring to. I immediately knew he was after her and as soon as I said that he mounted her. After he pursued her, he was on top of her so much that only her little head is popping out of the water. Then he releases her and she flutters her wings and follows after him. )


But back to our geese couple… could also have been that he was caring for her or trying to get attention to help her because she seemed to appear to have a odd bulge on her neck that didn’t seem normal. Reiki on the way….

In any case, he was exhibiting boundaries since they are very territorial – a great reiteration of the message about boundaries being important and that has constantly been a message collectively, as well as something I continue to exercise in bigger ways myself. I also consistently find myself giving this message to people I know, clients, and students. We are taught to believe in oneness, which is inherently the case of our collective nature, but one must know healthy boundaries in order to operate fully and empowered, as their piece within the whole.

And, maybe he wanted to also let me know that everything I had surmised from my reflection was accurate. 😉

He wanted to drive the message home so I would not forget about timing and alignments with the transitions I’m making and in fact it IS NOW, beginning immediately, just as I’ve felt and how things have lined up to free me. This all commencing tomorrow and fully kicking in Monday once we’re settled in our new temporary home.

So he continued forward toward me, but by this time everyone was out of the car, and so with her just behind him or to his side, he began lowering his neck and coming faster, now just two feet away.

At this point of my not being alone, the message or reflection became one of a group dynamic rather than mine solely, as after I had received his message and stepped out of the way without fear, he went toward the others.

When the head-forward display where they hold their head low and point it toward you or anything takes place, they are in fact feeling an increased threat of some sort. He never went into the bent-neck display, nor did he hiss or open his wings – sure signs of an attack about to follow. He simply kept charging forward.

I loved his standing in his power and creating a firm boundary.

Oddly, I was the only one who did not seem to have fear about this.

He actually got between one to two feet away from me at one point, since he moved fast, until I moved out of his path.

I don’t feel he actually wanted to attack. I feel he simply wanted to give a message.

I felt that he was reflecting a powerful stance of which I am also taking in my life, and reminds me of the dream where I met Neptune and rose to the occasion with standing in my power fully turned on.

I felt he was also exhibiting a reflection for the others with me, given their current journeys right now of which I am aware of.

But since I saw them first and he approached me first, I really had to giggle inside since I’d literally been immersing myself in geese reflection just a few hours before.

Perhaps this understanding of mirrors, geese symbolism, and my awareness around my life shifts helped me to be at ease and find the humor in this timely experience of perfection, not feeling fear, although also not making foolish moves.

I honored the goose and what he was standing up for, as well as respected our mutual journeys that had crossed paths in reflection.

While I did not take an attack stance back, which others did, I also didn’t just turn a cheek to the potency of the experience.

I looked it full on and honored the goose energy within us both, so there was no need for defense, but simply to flow in harmony with Nature once I received the message.

And so I freely and safely moved on to my own path, after the meaning of our convergence was received, so that the goose could continue on his.

There was mutual respect and understanding between us.

I found Nature, once again, to be such an amazingly wise and synchronous friend who always provides the answers if we are present enough to receive and integrate them.

Celebrate Today & The Entire Journey

We all go through struggles and challenges, but we also all have the ability to pass through the veils and experience what awaits us on the other side.

Celebrate you today and how far you’ve come.

This is a day I’m celebrating how far I’ve come – the depth of the entire journey I’ve discovered and learned to navigate.

I shared this on Facebook yesterday, but since it’s in alignment with my recent posts from the last few days, I thought I’d share this quick little reflection and message here too:

Today is wow here!

beautiful day

Tank top weather, windows open with ocean breeze, I’m even getting a tan while at my desk working lol! and feeling more and more grateful and invigorated every day.

my view.jpg

We may have simplified our life and are living a life not everyone would choose, but the gifts and nature’s surprises are in abundance and my joy and peace is increasing by the day!


Does that mean this is the only way to experience stuff like this – heck no!

But if you listen to, support, and take action in alignment with your truth while integrating more balance, Nature, and letting go into your life, you’ll too experience more inspiration, invigoration, and vibrancy in the way perfect for you and your path.

I don’t have to pinch myself, because I know I’m awake and it is all real.

I/you create my/your own reality with each choice.

I’ve seen my life over all of the years go from one challenge and struggle after another, constantly working with the shadow, feeling stuck, unrelenting heart ache, and giving up, to ease, peace, constant inspiration, flow, and magick.

It’s available to us all.

I’m falling more in love with life because of truly coming to understand the meaning of it, which is all feelings and all experiences.

I am grateful for the entire journey…not just for where I am now, as without all of the pieces I would not truly understand this gift of life.

So, yes, I’m grateful for all of the challenge that has gotten me here because now when anything shows up I have a new appreciation for it and know my power in creating more of it, or something else when ever I so choose.

And so do we all.

It’s not about running away or denying some experiences over the others.

It’s about understanding the beauty and value in all of it to help us remember the powerful creators we really are.

And then when we experience the things we enjoy most, we REALLY have gratitude for it.

And when we experience the things that are more painful, we can REALLY have gratitude for it.

And at some point they just all become experiences and energy we have the ability to create and channel or not.

So, while I am basking in this light right now and feeling free, it is because I have basked in the dark and learned to turn the chains I used to feel there into a pathway of flowers I simply have to fully inhale in order to receive the gift of their fragrance.
malibu view


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