Rooting & Carving the Volcanic Force of Vitality ~ Molten Alchemy Pulsing Through My Veins

Hello my friends and happy Spring! It feels good to be back and to touch in with you all again. My time away has been wonderful and insightful – the tiny tendrils of fresh new life within are indeed stretching with open arms to the golden rays of sunshine.

Continuing in the vein of less posts, but more content when I do actually share, today’s return review will encapsulate layers of take-aways spanning over the last 17 days. I may not draw full conclusions or tie in every single detail I mention, as I do enjoy sharing/weaving stories more than detailing what I feel the reader can extract and receive on their own, relative to what speaks to you. But I will highlight standouts and some of the things gleaned that feel of value to share because of collective connection.

If you don’t want to read the whole share, but are a crystal cocreator, like me, you can scroll to the end for the current Spring surprise offering and upcoming one. There’s also links to online workshops, as I’ve noticed an upswing in questions and registering, likely due to the current wave of energies everyone’s riding.

As you know, I was away for ten days and also took time before and after our journey to create space for that experience, personal breaths, and anything needing to integrate as bookends.

Some really significant things took place before we headed out and around my birthday. This included snow levels breaking all historical numbers since record-keeping began in the 1950s for the Southern Sierra just the weekend before we left, standing at 283% of normal. The Central Sierra is at 231% of normal and may also reach historical high after this current atmospheric river storm we’re experiencing, and Tahoe is closing in on the 1952 record at just 135 inches below it. Although this present storm could bring another 48 inches and close the gap between first and second some more. There are a couple of ski resorts reporting they’ll be open through July and most others including the one we frequent is staying open until beginning of May. That’s a LOT of water energy for this Year of the Water Rabbit.

AND then there was the complete flipping of Lake Tahoe taking place on February 27th – just the day after my birthday. This means that the water filling the lake, fully mixed from top to bottom of its 1640 foot depth and was the same temperature throughout, which is a rare occurrence. The last time was during the 2018-2019 Winter. This feels significant like a total reset-refresh, and in fact it does create the best conditions for aquatic plants and animals in terms of oxygenation, nutrient redistribution, and cooling the bottom during geothermal heating. It also provides much greater clarity to farther depths overall – so of course I’m looking at that water element symbolism I feel is such a key/challenging energy for us to process and integrate. I think you can connect the dots on other take-aways.

And while that was happening, Dave and I continued to immerse in major shoveling work around and above the house, clearing paths, jacuzzi, gas lines, and roof. We also got a crew to do most of the heavy work on areas Dave hadn’t done on the roof – he was focused on the perimeter where ice dams form and putting up heat tape – as there’d been too many stories of establishments (including 2 of the grocery stores we frequent) and homes all having their roofs collapse or compromised. The amount of snow that came off of the roof ended up creating more work to remove areas we’d cleared and also created a Tania-friendly way to get on the roof if desired, as the level meeting the pile-up already on the side of the garage now made a level walkway from bank to roof LOL!

We all know of my height fear I’ve been working through, and climbing ladders fall into that category, especially that first big step from ladder to roof, which is why Dave did the upper work and I stuck to the ground like a rabbit. I was only ever able to make it to the second to top step of the ladder, but froze and could not let go even with Dave there to help. I embraced my limitation without judgment and this ladder fear would end up coming full circle, as you’ll see near the end of today’s share. Needless to say, we got everything accomplished before heading out that put our minds at rest. We wanted to leave our home in the hands of our house/animal sitters without stress.

We did have snow mixed with rain storms the days leading up to our departure and that made for another epic journey for our sitters who were driving up from Southern California and had to get over the pass. Without going into details, they arrived at 11pm the night before we left and said they’d never been on such a wild adventure before that had their senses on all-time high and them using all their energy work and prayers. What troupers they were, arriving all smiles, starry-eyed, and hearts open. They were just like Desiree with all she went through to get here for my birthday. The fur babies immediately warmed up to these faery souls and we all knew divine alignment struck again!

It poured rain the whole way down the mountain and to the airport the next morning, but the roads were completely clear and our flight was on time and departure went smoothly.

We had three connections to our destination – the first being to LAX. It just so happened that the same day we were flying into Los Angeles – 3/14 – was the same day the President was. Air Force One had just arrived right before we did, so there was a backup of planes waiting to get to gates. It didn’t affect us, as we had time before our next plane, but I did find that intersecting dynamic of interest.

All was well and our next flight was on time and we took off with ease. Of course, you can bet I did energy work for all the travels – especially given weather and events of late around travels for people – so we were grateful. And while we didn’t have any flight challenges, there was a challenge that took place on our flight for a woman sitting two rows ahead, but diagonally to the right, three seats. This woman started having seizures about half way through the flight and they continued over and over. There was a lot going on and flight attendants on phones to ER and running around, as well as passenger nurses and cardiologist that just happened to be on the plane, coming to her assistance. I did my best to send energy from where I was and they managed to get her through. Emergency personnel came to get her when we landed and we were all just grateful she made it.

We arrived on time and waited for our last flight. It was a little late due to wind issues, so we did arrive 30 minutes later than scheduled. We had to circle once and retry the landing – a new perspective was successful! All-in-all, quite seamless in terms of three connecting flights. I looked out the window just before our last landing and the sky was just stunning and lit up in gold – the recurring theme these days. I noticed that an eye appeared in the water just below the clouds on the right. To me it was an immediate Eye of Horus and I could actually see the whole falcon. Can you?

Touchdown, Big Island of Hawaii. And this would begin a huge contrast and harmonizing balance to all of the snow experiences I shared – from snow and ice enchantment to tropical paradise. One form of water to another.

We were the very last flight into this little airport that shuts everything down at 9pm. We were unable to pick up our rental car and even the courtesy taxi phone had gone to bed. But divine timing can always be our friend, if we stay in alignment. It was obvious we wouldn’t make it to our destination about an hour and 20 minutes away, so Dave immediately looked for a hotel room by the airport on his cell phone. Dave wasn’t coming up with anything really close, but what he did find was hugely expensive just for one night – upwards of $400-500. So, I jumped on my cell phone just in case something else popped up and the first thing I saw was just under two miles away for only $163. There was ONLY ONE room left. I booked it immediately. I called to ask if they had a shuttle or something and they didn’t. The woman said she’d be there until 10:30pm if we could get there, otherwise she’d leave the key with security. It was 10pm.

While Dave started looking up potential car services – none were available including Uber – and said maybe we’d have to walk. I decided to try the taxi phone again and while I walked there I noticed two women who were in the same boat as us and talked to them. Then a couple walked up. They were waiting for their taxi that they’d arranged earlier.

The taxi driver shows up and I was taken back by how much he looked and acted like a sweet friend of mine who passed just months ago. We talked to him and the couple and they both said we could join them and he’d take us to our hotel first because it was on the way to theirs. He promised to return for the two women who couldn’t fit in with us all and we promised to remind him.

And so we arrived, just minutes before the woman left to check us in, and all was well for a good night’s rest. Upon waking we’d head back to the airport to get our rental car. Although we didn’t make it that night to our place, we were well taken care of and felt like divine intervention may have prevented us from an accident or some other unknown event on the dark road to get there.

It ended up being a great unfolding because being in Hilo from the start of the day gave us time to do things in the area before heading to our destination. Our morning taxi driver gave us good tips and we hit a great vegan spot for breakfast after picking up our convertible jeep. Originally we had a different car booked, but we decided to have some more fun and the choice did make for extra enjoyment, constant, warm sunshine on our skin, fresh air to breathe in deeply and whisk through our hair, as well as overall weeeeee freedom.

This whole trip was meant to be recharging, peaceful, and celebratory – basically a no-agenda vacation. Lately, we just want to create our own little world and experience around things, needing personal time on our own, so no one really knew where we were going except family. In my life I’ve spent a lot of time focused on others, so I really cherish and carve out my own time now. This ultimately helps me show up with an overflowing cup when I do immerse with others.

Other than knowing where we were going to stay, our trip was unplanned for the day-to-day. It was all about flow – in this case think lava flow. The Big Island is the only Hawaiian island I’ve had a draw to visit, as I’ve been to Maui and Oahu three times each, before, and Kauai once. I never got around to visiting Hawaii, but as always the timing was perfect for it to align with my 50th and where that’s brought me to in my life energetically. Each of the Hawaiian Islands are connected to chakras and the Big Island of Hawaii is linked to the Root Chakra, which is exactly the energy I am currently focused on.

Everyone is on a different trajectory and layer of their journey. For me, my focus in recent years has been on grounding, integrating, manifesting and merging all the more etheric energies into embodiment and Earthly living. Balance and harmony are my intentions and for me, the Root Chakra is a portal to harnessing our vitality, life force, and to repattern the core foundations we’ve been operating on that is held within our DNA – that to include ancestral lineage and collective restructuring from the core up and through. It’s also a way that we can bring all that good stuff we’ve mentally and intuitively attained and absorbed to bring visionary into being, imagination into creation, and feeling into experience.

Hawaii, the largest of the islands, is the home of four active volcanoes that I see as the blood of the Earth pulsing with creative force and reflective of the blood pulsing through our human veins. Hence the island is continually growing, as lava releases and turns to rock – creating more Earth/the element of the Root Chakra – and the island is full of life force and vitality. Mauna Loa is the largest, active volcano on Earth so being there was a way to literally dive into these most primal depths. I was connecting a lot with Pele who is both a destroyer and creator (in this way being somewhat similar to Kali), embodying the fire as an elemental force of nature and Goddess. Also known as Pelehonuamea, “She who shapes the sacred land,” her presence felt like a sacred sister to me while on the island and I couldn’t help but recognize her most intimately.

The beautiful thing I recognized and took away from our time on Hawaii, was just how much my processes have changed, how much work I have already done, and how quickly things can take root. I’ll explain that more as I continue, but even in contrast to what I felt as a relatively gentle process last year, considering my Chiron Return in motion and the things I was encountering to help me move the old energy through during our time by the ocean in Oregon, this took things to an even more fluid-with-ease place. You may recall my calling up those sealion and other animal death experiences to help process emotional integration. But just as with my 50th birthday’s sound healing ceremony recognition that I didn’t have any kind of emotional release or high from what was hugely powerful during that, the days on the Big Island proved to continue in that steady and even vein. No heavy stuff or triggers – just pure peace and flow, just as I sensed this trip and new time for me would be.

Pele is the goddess of fire, lightning, wind, dance and volcanoes, and I certainly felt like this reclaiming of Root energy in a new way was all of that wrapped up in a graceful hula – one of my favorite forms of visual dance that tells a story and moves a thousand energies like a picture paints a thousand words. I still recall my very first grass skirt, flowered bikini top and lei my parents brought back for me when they first visited the islands during my childhood and how I loved dancing in it for guests who visited. For me, the experience of Root integration was like liquid alchemy, transmuting Pele’s energy into golden flames of cold, frosty fire. This was actually something that came through in a meditation I’ll share later, but in the form of white flames that blurred the lines between hot and cold – you know that feeling of your hands feeling frozen and you run really hot water on them and you can’t tell if you’re burning or if you’re feeling the oddly soothing bite of liquid ice?

Anyway, our first day was a wonderful immersion to ignite our senses and get a feel for the days ahead. We ended up exploring a black sand beach as a way to set the tone for the days ahead after a nurturing, late breakfast – in fact every single beach we were drawn to on this trip was a black volcanic sand one.

That felt more than perfect, given the energies I sensed we’d come to soak in and integrate. And yes, that’s snow capping the peak of Mauna Kea behind me – a perfect linking integration between home and here.

I’ve been on black sand beaches in Tahiti and Iceland, but during this journey we nestled our feet and bodies into this rich, cleansing energy on a regular basis, which made one feel like a luxuriating dragon nesting on her sacred and potent ground.

After our volcanic beach exploration, we shifted gears to taking a drive up to visit some of the most known waterfalls in the area, Akaka Falls – a 442 foot tall fall.

The short and beautiful hike also passes a 300 foot tall waterfall and several smaller cascades in a lush rainforest setting. What made the day a beautiful mix of lovely surprises and reflections of flowing in alignment was the drive between the beach and falls. Our directions had us going one way, but we opted to take the sign that said “scenic drive” which wound through beautiful lushness, lovely vistas, and brought us to some hidden botanical gardens.

Originally we were going to see some gardens past our waterfall destination, but we felt we’d been guided to these ones instead so we embraced the grounds’ invitation that felt like a way the deities of the land were welcoming us.

And not only did we learn from some locals that this one was preferred, but they did end up being quite incredible and the grounds had a really great energy, providing us with more time to merge with our new and very dramatically contrasting landscape to our home we left behind.

It was also like Earth’s way of adorning us with a welcoming of all of her grace and beauty, as every turn of the path we wandered gifted us with a tropical ballroom of dancing faery blossoms, rich verdant drapery, and flowing waters full of effervescent energy.

Back home we love our crystalline alpine water inhabited by the Elementals of the region and here the warmer waters shared their own crystalline properties and whispering Devic realm.

I marveled at how of all of the photos we took on this trip, the ones Dave snapped of me by the “Ku” Tiki statue were the only ones that came out like a completely blurred vision you might see off in the distance through a portal that hasn’t fully crystallized into clarity because of its in between space. Not one of the four snaps were clear.

By choosing the scenic route, we also landed upon an out-of-the-way snack shack that had vegan options and where I immediately connected with the bohemian woman at the window wearing a gorgeous Ganesh bracelet and dawning sacred tattoos of her own. We complimented one another and shared a sweet resonance. Here we hydrated – Dave got a fresh coconut to sip on and I opted for the vegan piña colada before we continued on to Akaka Falls and the surrounding wonders around them.

After returning to Hilo we filled our tummies with vegan pizza in town and then headed off to our home away from home for the next 7 nights and 8 days – Kirpal Meditation and Ecological Center.

We ended up feeling called to stay in the south east and east side of the island our whole trip, as we didn’t feel drawn to venture to the much more touristy areas, nor did we feel like spending our time driving long hours when we could immerse ourselves and relax instead. This also meant we were staying on the wet side of the island. The further west you traveled, the dryer part of the island could be found. That said, the people of KMEC said Gaia and the Gods and Goddesses must like us, as we did not have one day of rain while there, which they said was quite a gift. Right before we arrived there had been rain, and the day we were leaving, a huge downpour bookended the trip. We enjoyed sunshine and warmth, jeep top down, and beach recharge every single day. It felt SO good to dig in my feet and wiggle my toes through all of that good ol’ black volcanic sand.

A blessing indeed to experience the window that opened and our aligning with things to enhance our experience in ways we desired. We were filled with extreme gratitude. And my Pisces toes and feet were feeling the extra healing nourishment indeed. It was actually fun to reflect on the dramatic contrasts of our moving from wearing thumper skis on the mountains to glide through the powder like a bunny to flippers to glide through the water like a mermaid and then bare foot it rather than layer up in cozies. Then of course dip right back into the former, although returning with sun kissed golden skin and revitalized embodiment.

Upon arrival to our all-vegan retreat we were greeted warmly and felt a big Aloha welcome of arriving home. After a little orientation to our new 10 acres of organic orchard, off-grid land to stretch our bodies and soul in, we settled into our little cabin named perfectly – Butterfly – then ventured off on an evening walk to our neighboring volcanic beach to catch our first sunset.

The area is remote and access takes you down mystical old growth mangoes and across volcanic moonscapes left behind from the 2018 eruption that missed taking out KMEC – it’s thought that Pele protected this sacred area because of the uplifting things happening there.

The long tree-laced roads to get there were incredibly mysterious and full of energies whispering day and night. We walked or drove down them at all hours and each time was as magickal as the next.

We enjoyed long, restful, deep sleeps with lullabies by frogs and other tropical musicians, stunning star-lit diamond-clear night skies, illuminated moon vistas, fragrant, cooling trade winds, long walks to nearby beaches and thermal warm ponds, yoga, sunrise and sunset meditations, fresh, nourishing meals made with love, and wonderful talks with community staff and founders. We were the only guests during our stay, so it was the perfect backdrop for serenity carved out in divine personal reflection.

It was so much fun to be surrounded by new creatures we don’t have back home and having these spirit messengers enveloping us with love made us feel extra welcome.

Colorful and curious geckos surrounded us daily, bold mongooses frolicked across our path, wild pigs grunted mysteriously in the night and surrounded our cabin, infusing guttural chants as ritual, core awakening, jungle cats enchanted us with their cosmic eyes and nestled warmly into our touch, roosters reminded us that a new day awaited, and feral cows mooed divine mother hums that stirred the fertile soils within. All of these and more were our new companions for our time away.

My favorite were the saffron finches, reminding me of our chickadees back home. Their vibrant yellow feathers just lit me up each time they fluttered and sang about. One evening’s walk even gifted us a whole tree of them!

The founder’s wife said she only ever sees them in pairs, so this was quite a gift. It reminded me of an abundant and vernal tree of life, oozing with golden goodness.

And we of course were mesmerized by our sea turtle brothers and sisters. We were blessed with three sea turtle encounters in a row that increased by the day. The first took place at the end of our first full day after having reached our destination.

We sat above a magickally lit ocean cliff on volcanic rock overlooking the water and watching the sun set, when we both at the same time noticed a sea turtle swimming toward us, below.

A second appeared a bit to the left, but the first one kept dancing in the water and we both felt immediately that we’d been guided right there so that this soul could connect with and welcome us back – I say back, as I know I have “roots” here.

This experience took place after quite a magickal beach day snorkeling and recharging, and our unusual, but synchronous lunch experience in the local town. Both Dave and I had forgotten our wallets back in our cabin. We didn’t realize this until we were about to head into the restaurant. We weren’t sure what to do, or if we’d have to drive back the half an hour both ways to get money. Lunch had already been served back at our place and we don’t eat dinner, so we weren’t going to wait for that meal. Dave got the idea to go ask the restaurant if they might take some other form of payment like Venmo or Paypal.

While he went in, I waited in the car, noticed the “Hawaiian Fairy” sign on a neighboring store, and asked for some help. I then see Dave come out and waves me over. I then learn what unfolded.

No one was in the restaurant, but one man who was just paying his own bill. Apparently he overheard Dave’s conversation with the server and when the restaurant shared they didn’t have a way that worked for what we had, the man offered to help. He handed Dave $100 cash (saying that way we’d have some extra cash as well as lunch money) and told him he could Venmo him instead. So that’s what went down. Dave wanted to give him extra as a thank you and he said, “No, that’s okay. This is my good deed for the day. I’m happy to help. Just pay it forward.”

So we enjoyed a wonderful Thai lunch, gifted by this man, all because of divine alignment and open hearts meeting together in the flow of kindness and a little faery dust.

It was after that, that the sea turtles swam to us. We were grateful for the blessings surrounding us.

We finished the day off with a private meditation on our own in the on-site, custom-designed Balinese Meditation Pavilion – the perfect space for sunrise and sunset meetings of the spirit and body.

In fact the grounds and our cabin were all infused in the sacred energy of this land and the love and devotion that has been nurtured here. This was the view from our home away from home where our new jeep friend awaited us each morning for the next adventure.

From the gardens, orchards and eco built community, to the jungle and horizon where Cosmos meets Earth – you are surrounded in beauty and depth that await the embrace of open heart meeting intention.

We then started the next day with a 6am meditation there again. This was a great spot to watch the gorgeous sunrises rise above the Pavilion and catch glimpse of the sky portals inviting us into a new day’s experience.

I began to notice a theme happening with my meditations. No matter how I tried to clear my mind or do my usual inner guidance for any intentions or receiving of messages, I just kept noticing a flow of old experiences circulating through. At first I tried to shift that, but I immediately noticed that THIS was what was naturally and organically needing to happen – a fluid releasing flow of letting them go. I instinctively called upon Pele and the spirits of the land to help take these experiences – what felt like the remnant remaining pieces – and to smolder and melt them away into the molten lava so they could transmute like the volcanic elements destroy and create anew.

Everything was moving and integrating smoothly, organically, and easily. There wasn’t any hard work to do with it, but allow, surrender, ask, and let go. Moments replacing years. In part that is because of already doing years of work in the past, but in part it is a reflection of the now. Things CAN be more simple and fluid when we step into that space of potential. It really depends on our individual journey and what we are both here to experience and here to offer the collective as part of that experience. Crafting our lives can shift like the ebbs and flows of ocean waves. There’s no judgment where we find ourselves. There’s simply an offering that we have various ways available and unlimited opportunities to recreate experiences to mirror ourselves in each moment.

Our second sea turtle experience brought us even closer, as we decided to return to some of the black sand beaches back in Hilo to snorkel and enjoy the sunshine, sand, and water. We decided to try one beach first and explored there, before heading back to the first beach we surveyed on the day after our arrival. By choosing to stop at the first one instead of going straight to the beach on our trajectory, this created the alignment for an up close encounter. Here is the sea turtle at water’s edge that greeted us before descending the lava rock into the water.

The second beach we went to had incredible underwater coral forests with a huge variety of vibrant colorful fishes that swam around like water butterflies. Giant sea urchins of black and red peeked out from rocks like battle axes mirroring the fiery volcanic energies surrounding us.

We enjoyed many deliciously vibrant vegan meals and even a full vegan bakery, which we frequented every time we passed it. I had to giggle at its name given the running joke I have with my laughing-to-tears banana bud, Lynne.

There were equally a lot of beautifully vibrant murals reflecting the perfect scenes and messengers for us.

Every day was a new experience for the senses to take in diverse and perfectly balancing contrasts to our life back home. We never drove more than 2 hours to a destination, but even that was just a one-time thing, as I mentioned we were wanting to relax and immerse in what was already accessible around us, rather than work for or hunt down things.

Ease and flow.

Peace and slow.

We were happy we did make that 2 hour drive on the day we did, as it gifted us our third sea turtle experience consecutively following the other two. We found ourselves the largest of black sand beaches and spent the day snorkeling and luxuriating in the tropical bliss.

It was here that our encounters took us closer with the third time being the charm that the other two were prepping us for. First, sea turtle swam to us from below our cliff-top perch. Second, sea turtle greeted us at water’s edge. Here they are in the collage below – the circle highlights the first sea turtle we saw from the cliff.

And third, we found ourselves swimming with sea turtles in a beautiful underwater dance. Gliding along, but maintaining our distance, the beauty of our mirroring was impressed in our hearts.

The day before Spring Equinox we started and ended our day with a 6am and 5pm meditation that framed another lovely beach and snorkeling immersion. The later hour-long meditation was the only one that was joined by three others to include the founder and his wife.

The founder led us briefly in sharing some readings and a very short prompt to support the meditation time to follow, if desired. This was the meditation that shifted everything from my previous meditations so far, although all of them were very fluid and peaceful because of my surrendering without judgment, as well as copartnering in the teamwork being offered.

Up until then, as mentioned, my meditations were transmutational with Pele assisting the process. This time, I was led to inwardly chant OM throughout the 50 minutes or so of silence. I won’t go into all that took place, but I was back to accessing my usual visual journey that began with Buddha appearing, a close-up elephant’s eye, then tall robed light beings, gateways upon gateways opening that were lined in white flames of frosty fire (you may recall my mentioning this at the start) blurring the lines between hot and cold, more beings, a close-up turtle’s eye that morphed into an interdimensional being and then a dragon’s eye, and throughout there was a movement from first violet color showing up, then red, and then green.

I knew something had shifted from the previous meditational journeys.

That evening we enjoyed some tea and conversation that followed an interesting dynamic play out that held some really powerful takeaways.

We made some beautiful connections during our stay, but the special one for me was with the founder’s wife. She and I had an instant rapport and synergy. We later discovered that not only were we both Pisces souls (she’s actually very Pisces with 3 planets in the sign and has an identical twin), but in fact our birthdays were just a day apart. Hers is February 25th and mine is the 26th.

I looked forward to our chats with Mara and immediately missed her upon returning home, but we feel we’ll see each other again. Although separated by a generation, we felt like sisters. There’s potential for something fun in the near future to be in the works that was briefly discussed and put on the table.

The day of Spring Equinox couldn’t have been more perfect to me. This was the day we were guided to go visit Hawaii Volcanoes National Park. Hello Pele!

We began this day with an early morning walk at 5:30am to greet the sunrise.

The beach we thought we might go to to watch it was closed and there was an attendant who said we’d have to come back at 9am. I felt immediately there was reason that we would discover later.

So, rather than be discouraged and walk back, we turned down the perpendicular road and walked to where I saw a clearing in the field.

There was a black lava rock bridge wall on both sides. We sat on the one facing the opening and the colors started to dance as the sun welcomed a new day.

As I looked to the right where we were originally headed, I saw that the sky there was muted and none of the splashes of color were present.

It was all going down on the stage in front of us and the stone wall was our seat for the show, as you can see.

We followed this new season’s greeting with a spectacular vegan breakfast in town at the cutest, artsy, vibrant little place that mirrored our morning Spring Equinox sunrise.

Just look at this gorgeous yumminess in every color of the rainbow!

Then with nourished, happy tummies, we made our way to the wonderful experiences that awaited us.

Our explorations spanned 6 miles of walking and 40 minutes drive of stunning landscapes, with stops along the way that included shorter and longer immersions.

We walked the Kilauea Iki Crater.

Explored the Thurston Lava Tube.

Traversed the dense tropical forested ridges in between.

Drove the Chain of Craters Road upon which we stopped at each crater to experience them.

Saw many steaming hot spots emerging from the cracked open volcanic rock from the Earth below.

Took in the Holei Sea Arch at the end of the Chain of Craters Road, which the guide we spoke to at onset of our day said to make sure not to miss as it’s thought it may not be around for more than 2 more years.

And hiked out to breathe in the ancient energies at Pu’uloa Petroglyphs site where there’s a gallery of 23,000 etchings in the volcanic rocks surrounding the area, which is one of the most extensive petroglyph fields in Hawaii. These document the life and culture of the native Hawaiian people.

It was all incredibly fascinating and richly nourishing with landscapes that were enlivening and richly expanding from the inside out.

And although all of it was incredible there were definitely highlighted moments and experiences where I felt a LOT.

One of these was while we walked through Kilauea Iki Crater. Dave and I were together for the first half and then he got ahead, while I was exploring some of the incredible lava rock and hidden nook areas. I’m often a little behind him, as my hawk eyes and faery senses draw me in, but then I always catch up. I noted an invigorating, raw, and large energy fill the space within me and it was merging animal, human, mineral, and star altogether. Pele was close and also within.

This was also dragon essence, but it was not just deep, primal earth, but the spaces in between and the expanse of All and Nothing. I can only think alchemy where elements mix and become all of their origins and more – golden, but also diamond clear as the pristine essence of molten lava stars bursting through a black hole into their own unified conception of creation anew. It’s like digging for a treasure so deep into the ground that you pierce through to another world. Words fail.

The standout to both of us was the petroglyphs. We were so grateful for our timing with things, as this day followed in suit of things just being extra peaceful and not feeling like we were consumed by tourists. In fact, we had so much space that we were able to sit and meditate for a short while near the petroglyph site to just “be” with the energy.

I loved this whole area and the walk to the site. You could feel the sacredness seeping forth from the ground and wrapping you from all around. I especially was moved by the sound of pods rattling in the wind on the flowering plants that surrounded us. At first I couldn’t figure out what was making that sound, and was instantly taken away to visions of sacred ceremonies taking place in the present moment and as if we were walking in a procession where ancients were shaking their rattles in mutual respect and honor as we passed. It was like a giant ceremony was taking place and their rattles were bathing us in energetic cleansing and activation. I discovered the pod when we sat down to tune into the Earth here and the energies. I picked one up and shook it in amazement. It was indeed a mini rattle.

Although I now knew what was making the sound it didn’t take away from the sacredness of the experience, but in fact enhanced it. Everything felt alive and infused with spirit. The way the pods shook in the wind sounded deliberate and had a cadence and rhythm to it that felt intentional. At times brisk like sweeping the air. And other times it was longer while it worked with the energy.

I sat with my hands on the volcanic rock and asked if there was a message they wanted to give me.

I saw a white mountain goat appear and then the word “Akua” immediately followed. I also saw the face of a female indigenous figure who felt to have lived there before.

I thought I made the word up and didn’t know that it was an actual word until we returned to the car and I researched to see if it meant anything.

The first thing that popped up was this definition:

a god

  1. Formerly, among Hawaiians, the name of any supernatural being, the object of fear or worship; a god.

Then I found this:

Ancient Hawaiians worshipped a vast number of deities, of which there were two main categories. Akua represented nature’s elements—they were the personifications of great natural forces. The ‘aumakua were the familiar ancestral protective gods.


Akua has many meanings, but none more common in today’s Hawaiian than God. In Hawaiian, there are many different kinds of gods, and akua can mean goddess, spirit, ghost, devil, image, idol, divine, even a corpse.

And this:

1. vs. God, goddess, spirit, ghost, devil, image, idol, corpse; divine, supernatural, godly. Akua might mate with humans and give birth to normal humans, moʻo, or kupua

Since I don’t know anything about this word, nor did I even know if it was an actual word or thing, and it’s the first time I’m seeing it, I’ll just leave those meanings there for now and my takeaways held in heart.

Before we returned home we stopped to eat and I picked up 3 small items that spoke to me at the Hawaiian Fairy – the only store I ever entered and was drawn to. It took me only minutes to find them, as I had intention around it, and everything was really inexpensive.

A lava rock bracelet jumped out right away – it was the ONLY one with interspersed golden beads and a center one with OM on it (perfect given my chant in the meditation that shifted things into ease of moving energy and unified alignment with All That Is/Universe).

A sea turtle pendant with howlite shell – divine because the sea turtle brothers and sisters ignited key vibrational frequencies in my heart and held direct connection with my dear tortoise Gaia who once was a giant sea turtle in ancient times and who works with ley lines, sound frequencies, and Earth gridding.

Red (lava and blood reflecting) Balinese harem style pants with black (volcanic rock and deep Earth/shadow reflecting) Egyptian figures at the ankles, waist, and waist pocket – mirroring Horus and the Eye of Horus I saw upon landing and ancient roots. Both the red and black also reflecting Pele, Root Chakra integration, and the transmutation I experienced.

These symbolized the standouts to me on this trip that gifted me layers of richness.

The next day of the Aries New Moon we continued to flow with what the morning’s inspiration was and rather than explore more hikes, since the island spirits were showering us with sunshine blessings, we opted for a last day of black sand beach bliss and snorkeling. We really felt the day of our departure that rain would definitely hit, so soaking in all the ocean and relaxing we could into our skin, felt in order. Before heading back to our nearby spot, we first explored another area of interest just minutes from our retreat where a collapsed lava tube remains. You can’t really see it as clearly as others, since it had new growth, but the area is caved in like a half tube and the cliffs there offer incredible vistas and crashing waves.

It was a beautiful and equally relaxing and activating day, with the largest waves coming to shore that we’d seen so far – reflecting to us the weather was getting ready to shift and the energy in the air was potent and fertile.

We enjoyed some rest, fun, snorkeling and swimming, and just some good ol’ being.

Time moves fast, but we don’t need to. Fully luxuriating in the moment with all of our senses has been the guiding force of our lives. And this time away accentuated that.

We felt cradled in Earth’s nourishment while dragon energy rested behind us in the cliff walls, Pele’s vitality enveloped us all around, and the vast ocean rolled in new energy with each cleansing sweep at our feet.

We put in one more stop along the way back to our cabin to take in day’s end on the open lawn overlooking the ocean where many locals loved to hang out at sunset.

There we nestled into the cool grass in silence and just breathed in the expanse of our time shared on the island. I smiled at the beauty of it all and with gratitude filling my heart for so much I can’t begin to explain, I could feel everything more deeply than ever.

How much life has changed. Richer than the words we teach ourselves to say. It’s an act of being that no story could ever be told in the way only one knows and experiences.

That last evening we decided to close things out in the meditation pavilion and it was another beautiful visionary journey I won’t go into except for the last message I received upon asking if there was something wanting to be shared. The words “deserve” and “reprieve” came through right away and a download of what this meant.

In part, I knew this was a framing of what this trip was about for me, as well as the next leg of my journey.

I’ve been on many sacred travels over my years that have taken me to high energy spots on Earth, vortex areas, and sites of ancient civilizations. My usual experience in the past has been about moving through a lot of stuff that I access by being there and doing integrative healing work individually and collectively.

I would have emotional clearing or heightened emotions flow through. The same has been with much of my spiritual growth work over my life – that felt like work and took time and effort. But more recently things have been shifting and especially since my birthday, this has transformed and dissipated into a new ease and grace that encompasses layers of feelings that instead come through as expanse rather than individualizing each frequency. It’s this new smooth space of everything and nothing that is both powerful and soft.

This journey proved the same…fluid and undefined. Like the breath of life or the wave of the ocean that moves in and out and doesn’t think twice about it. It just is.

My takeaway from this trip, like with my birthday sound healing ceremony, was ease and flow. And this put the message of “deserve” and “reprieve” into perspective.

Another layer to my meditation on that last New Moon evening was a clear download for channeling a language fluidly through sound and crystals. I saw, heard, and felt myself, during the meditation, inwardly expressing this star/ancient language that I could easily have started chanting out loud, but refrained so as not to disturb Dave’s silent meditation.

This added richness to that expansive feeling newly rooting.

That last night we met a new guest that just arrived – the only other since we’d been there. I thought it was fun to learn that she was a rabbit mom, too, and that was a sweet synergy and reflection of more alignment and continuation of resonance as we were slipping out and she was slipping in.

I mentioned that throughout our journey we had rain-free days – such a blessing given we’d come from snow storms and rain with intention to have a tropical retreat infusion of warmth and beach time. The goddesses and gods were shining upon us, as it wasn’t until our day of departure that rain graced us. It was as if they’d been holding it all back the entire trip and then released it with a downpour on that last day. It began the night before and continued until we left.

No worries, as we had already taken advantage of every day of sunshine provided us, soaking in all the good snorkeling and ocean energy, as well as immersions that we desired. It was interesting, because each day we’d check weather forecasts and rain was said to be coming on half of the days, but never did. It seemed more evident this last day would actually release wetness, so we thought ahead and made reservations for a special tour before departing that would take advantage of a rainy day.

So on our last morning, in the fresh energies that the New Moon ignited, we made our way to Kazumura Cave – lava tube on the island of Hawaii. This couldn’t have been a more perfect closure to our trip and really encapsulated so much of the energy I felt we were downloading and integrating while being here. It also provided opportunity for me to experience a shift in my relationship to things that once unnerved me or were challenging in earlier years, as well as helped me move through that height fear I mentioned at the start with climbing ladders.

Dave found this cave experience and I’m so glad he did. It’s a journey that takes you through the world’s longest known continuous lava tube that is virtually unknown, but a national treasure indeed. It’s considered the most important of several lava tubes that formed in the Aila’au eruption that is carbon dated as happening between 1410 and 1470, although oral accounts place it in the 1600’s. Geologically, it’s considered a master lava tube that embodies nearly every type of feature found in lava tubes. It has at least 101 known entrances spanning its 42.5 miles and is the deepest known continuous cave in the U.S. at 3613 feet.

The guardian of this entrance to the cave, Harry, is a special soul indeed. I thoroughly enjoyed his energy and the massive amount of knowledge, enthusiasm, and respect he has about and for the cave/tube is incredible – he’s explored 24ish of the nearly 43 miles of the cave. The divine manifestation story of how he came to be the guardian, finding the entrance behind his home, and learning more about the unusual gifts he has were truly a wonder to hear about. He spends most of his life underground with his companion cave whom you can feel her vitality and breath upon entering.

What an experience! Without detailing it all, I’ll cut to my transformations inside, which included my relationship to claustrophobia and childhood “darkness” fears. I had none of this while inside the cave as we journeyed about 3/4 of a mile down and in. We took a moment near the end where we shut off all of our lamps and sat in silence in the dark. There were just 5 of us – a grandmother and daughter, Dave and I, and Harry. Harry had just finished telling some incredible stories of his experiences in life about seeing beings slip through dimensions, some were what would be considered scary, and also about a child spirit he once encountered in the cave. My childhood and growing up would have had me feeling quite scared sitting in utter darkness with our backs to the depths of Earth’s abyss. This due in part to the ongoing experiences I had since I was a child, and for many years, of presences, sightings, and encounters that at the time I didn’t know how to process. Coupled with a brother who liked to scare me, since he knew I had a very fine line between realms and what one deemed fake and real, and it all added up.

And yet I felt nothing but expanse and complete serenity in the absolute dark, but very alive and potently fertile underground chamber. In fact, it all felt welcoming and familiar. My fears did not exist in this space, but instead turned into possibility and wonder.

The silence, stillness, and complete dark/shadow energy was my friend and I was being cradled in her womb. I felt the power of this inner harmonizing and it was empowering and humbling. As I sat in the dark abyss, with my hands touching the volcanic rock below me, I received more messaging of the downloads happening.

I was claiming my force – life force – with the knowledge of being able to carve and shape it, just like the lava had with creating the tube, for creative life birthing and vitality. The cave was a living, breathing being sharing her secrets of renewal through the natural process of destruction and creation that reimagines and then reforms itself again and again.

It was all full circle – this gentle power and vulnerable strength merging as one in the moment where you feel all of it without separation until you try to name it.

My inner dragon, Pele, ancient turtle/Gaia energy, was all swirling within me in this void of creation at my core. It was so peaceful and potent.

Dave later shared that he’d actually felt unnerved at the end and after the stories was looking behind us to see if he’d see anything – partly wanting to and not wanting to lol! I said, I’d never felt more peace with the darkness and all of the vast energies one might encounter within it. This was a huge shift and transmutation. And it happened organically here.

The other transformation was my relationship to heights and ladders. I didn’t know we’d be climbing tall ladders up and down inside the cave or using a rope to climb up at one point. It was likely better I didn’t, as I then had to be in the moment with it. It definitely challenged my feelings around it, but I decided to face and embrace it.

So each time I had to climb a ladder, I got very present in body and took deliberate, slow and steady turtle steps and arm reaches up and down each rung. I stayed focused right in front me, just like I taught myself with skiing, and not trying to take in everything around me. And I did it! It did call up my inner resiliency and strength, but fear didn’t run the show…my conscious awareness and guidance directed things so that fear had a firm and fatherly hand, while also feeling the motherly encouragement, nurturing and understanding. I didn’t try to ignore feelings or judge them. I merely parented and supported myself through it.

Not only did I feel so much energetically download while down there, but another layer of strength and courage took form.

Once again, demonstrating and reiterating what is possible and available to us all in our own timing.

Harry had mentioned to us upon arrival that they had officially announced that morning that Kīlauea volcano had ceased erupting and lava is no longer flowing within Halemaʻumaʻu Crater. This pause in its flow aligning with our last day leaving was an interesting synchronicity and alignment.

The roots of this time away run deep, but wash over and through me like the sweet fragrance of budding Spring blossoms.

Every bit of richness was received with arms of gratitude and the ancient wisdom of the core elements were absorbed in ways I feel words can’t explain. You just know.

Primal depths, expansive void of creation, foundational support, manifestation alchemy, molten solidity, body wisdom, life force crafting, and grounded resiliency through life’s ebbs and flow, but also innocence, purity, childlike wisdom, sense of direction, and strong Earth/life connection…all of that and then some.

I can feel the molten alchemy pulsing through my veins, as the volcanic force of vitality roots within me and I learn to carve from the void of creation…

Blessings upon blessings I receive, understand, and I am grateful.

And just like that, our tropical paradise morphs dramatically back into the white mountain oasis where the gem of the Sierras, Lake Tahoe, resides. From one mother body of water and dramatic landscape to another sharing much wisdom within each to glean. In place of the golden sunset of our landing at onset of our trip, we were greeted with an expanse of white and blue.

We did make it to one of our favorite beaches here in the warm days following our return, just before our current storm blew in. This made for another seamless transition, just as our first day on Hawaii had gifted us a snow capped mountain behind our first beach touchdown.

Upon returning home I found Astrid dawning her Aries New Moon energy – quite literally. ♈️

You can see her new morphing in the photos above and below.

You may recall how she displayed a Full Moon perfect circle on her fur for the previous Virgo Full Moon (she’s a Virgo) and now she’s mirroring the double Aries New Moon energies, as we had one on March 21st while I was in Pele’s volcanic cave womb, and will again on April 19th PST, combining with a Solar Eclipse. You can also see the patch of silver highlighting her third eye at the symbol’s base.

I’ve talked about this before, how she (my cocreator and spirit sister) constantly uses her fur as frequency language to reflect and embody energies. Only she and my twin soul in rabbit body, Nestor, of all of my rabbit companions, had the ability to do this through their fur.. each of them speaking to me in what has always felt like cosmic hieroglyphics as a form of their communication. It may just seem like random molting, but I understand their depths from a different perspective.

And I love how her highlighting this Aries underscores much of the freshly ignited energy that I experienced as prevalent in terms of the elements, signs, and planets that the Root Chakra is associated with that interweave and intersect with me personally and my own astrological evolution.

While away, some downloads on energy movement and clear messaging came through, which strongly confirmed it was time to release some more of my special crystal partners to their new homes, which may excite some of you who have messaged me. These will be shared in an upcoming update, but for now the current remaining 8 pieces and bundles are receiving a Spring release with a 20% sale offering, also because of the messaging I received that they need to be with their cocreators. This is a huge discount considering they’re already priced at costs and especially so for the large, incredible Chromafusion pendants. If you follow their creator, Meagan Clark, you know how in demand her work is and she hardly has sales herself. So, if you’ve felt one of these now-key spirit messengers of the Air and Water to transform, flow, harmonize and create calling you, this may be the alignment you were hoping for: Creations & Crystals Closet

As mentioned above, I’ve noticed another upswing in people feeling called to support transformation in their life, further integration of their gifts, and/or take things to the next level. This is likely due to the strong, new energies streaming through that will affect everyone differently. I’ve been seeing more registrations and receiving inquiries as to what online workshops I’m currently offering or if I have any available (if in fact they didn’t know I did). The following links hopefully answer those questions: Empowerment Series and Reiki Certification Training

Oceans of Transformation ~ Early Spring Wishes for Your Creative Potential

This is just a quick, last post until likely end of March or beginning of April some time. I’ll be away for 10 days soon and we’re immersed in house snow remediation and overall preparation before heading out, so my windows are few and far between for spare moments.

Currently snow levels just surpassed 1970’s records here and we’re closing in on 1952 and they’re saying we could be on track to set a new single-season snowfall record. We HAVE experienced the coldest Winter, though, outdoing that latter year and this has created challenges since ice is forming – especially on rooves and many establishments have seen collapses. In fact, our famous Emerald Bay (one of the most photographed spots around the lake and in the world) has frozen over for the first time in decades due to the atmospheric river!

Indeed a LOT of firsts are happening here and this year – I’m still in awe of my 50th aligning with all of this.

Anyway, all of our neighbors are staying proactive and you can daily find everyone out on the rooftops shoveling, or clearing something – us included. So, we’ve definitely been getting tons of exercise here (moving huge fire energy, which is so good to channel it effectively like this). We’re grateful we have the physical ability and stamina to handle it all. It’s made for deep, restorative sleep indeed!

And you can bet I’m focusing on how all of this ties into collective dynamics and the way I can best do my threaded part in that tapestry.

I thought I’d lace the beautiful and dramatic sunset views throughout this share that I got to witness a few days ago because of being out back for hours shoveling away. There’s always a silver lining to things and seeing these colors painted across the sky gave me extra hope and inspiration about what’s growing beneath the surface of it all.

I only get small snippets of time here and there for things outside the scope of what I’m immersed in, but don’t really have the band-width anyway to focus deeply on things that aren’t immediately calling…part of the importance of staying in alignment right now that I feel, and drawing strong boundaries.

Perhaps some of you might be in that same energetic space?

I keep feeling profound changes taking place and form for a lot of people and Earth is definitely giving us a grand show in mirror to that. I’m floored by the 180 leaps many are taking and the resiliency demonstrated – the kind of stories you don’t hear as much about, but ARE happening. The messier things seem, the more transformation is happening.

I imagine the next time I touch in there’ll be more to dive into and share, including some more fun firsts hehe! For now, here’s some added things I’ve both been celebrating and feeling to bring through:

  • Today marks my 22nd year anniversary of legally changing my name to Tania Marie – making my middle name my last name. I always love that it falls during Pisces season and today is actually Daylight Savings Time, so that’s kind of “shine your light” and “be authentically bold” fun to add to that energy, since we Spring forward with more light now
  • A certain sweet friend and “spiritual skin” sacred tattoo client just ignited her FULL back piece I designed for her two years ago, getting the nearly full line work done on it a few days ago and it’s epic – can’t wait to hopefully share a photo when it’s completed this Spring – quite activating and full circle for us both and even collectively!
  • We added a potent little triad group of crystals to our offerings that came to us through a CA source a couple of months ago that we thought a particular “someone” would love out there – FYI I won’t be able to ship anything out until the week of March 27th (I had this group ready to go, but hadn’t time to put the claim button on them yet) – see Creations & Crystals Closet for them and the remaining, now-energy aligned beauties (more still to come as I have time!)
  • Hoping to have some sweet seasonal and inspirational rabbit ornaments available come later Spring and onward. Some pieces came to me that I look forward to painting in my off-time for fun – I always like to have a tiny side channel while I’m working away, as various creative channels are healthy for moving all that energy
  • A fun surprise collaboration that’s been written in the stars is upcoming! Stay tuned!

I’ll be away for the Spring Equinox of March 20th and the Aries New Moon on the 21st directly after.

This upcoming trip I sense will be drawing a line for me, so I’m looking forward to life changes on so many levels I haven’t even shared (every step we take is bringing our dreams and intentions closer, but Uni loves to support us when WE support us).

Usually, by this time we’re seeing melt and hints of sprouts pushing through. You might remember me having irises pop up through the snow for my birthday the last few years. This year we’re deeply immersed in a white womb – very literally – and although things are moving on a different time schedule, it feels aligned with the collective evolution. Things are definitely at work behind the scenes, and the pieces are finding their position on the game board of life. The generative powers of Spring always emerge, but Nature knows the time she needs and doesn’t rush or judge the process. I feel the more we flow with what shows up and calls upon us for recognition, the more we experience fluidity and grace – like a cetacean gliding through the watery depths.

As Laura shares in her recent “Magical New Moon in Aries” video and Preparing for Equinox 2023 post (see link), there’s a magickal selkie energy around this fresh cycle – think mermaids, seals, and ocean energy. This reminds me of our Oregon coast time that was deeply integrative, and even our time in Playa Del Carmen just preceding that – both felt foreshadowing of this upcoming trip of my return to the tropical beach and ocean, but being able to have a new relationship and experience now after moving through the Chiron stuff peacefully.

Can’t wait to see what I “rediscover” from my Pisces self to infuse into life and creations upon return.

Of course it just so happens that one of the several crystal energies that I’ve been getting a hit on strongly is Ocean Jasper. This beautiful mermaid with open druzy portals recently came to me (not readily seen in the closeup photo above or even in the group one below), along with a couple of other sister Ocean Jasper pieces that sit right in front of me on my desk alongside a beautiful little starfish and seal I was gifted – all part of my animal spirit collective who work with me daily.

Do you see a special “golden” smoky citrine bear anchoring things alongside his little quartz friend with golden solar plexus? The story behind his coming home to me is epic too! They join the gang in this location with rabbits, horse, hawk, and owl oh my!)

“Expansive” was my word from my birthday sound healing ceremony that added to my year word of “breakthrough,” so things continue to feel like a big opening of what I’ve sensed and been strengthening. All this varying water energy – frozen ice, snowflakes, white powder, alpine lakes and soon to be cosmic ocean, waterfalls, warm spring pools, tropical streams, and rainforests – really seems to be speaking to just how key it is to integrate these particular elemental depths.

Our water energy, emotions, feelings, subconscious, and shadow have been nudging and now screaming at us to pay attention, not ignore them, and start integrating these core pieces in an empowered way. It’s about bringing all of our parts together – the seen and unseen, the hidden and visible, and the conscious and subconscious – so we walk forth whole and aware. Alchemy in motion!

Do we want things to continue to feel like they’re happening to us, or would we rather feel like we’re cocreating things?

It’s a choice we each individually get to make.

I had a strong nudge to repost this, so I’m going to leave you with a reshare of my sound channeling, which you can go directly to at this link: Opening the Stargates

It feels particularly aligned with energies even more so right now, and the key codes within it just might add to the watering of seeds within, or the blossoming forth you desire this Spring.

Because WordPress doesn’t show videos through email notifications of posts, I’m linking instead.

I’d love to hear how you experience it if you haven’t heard it before, what you received the first time you did, and/or what it brings up for you differently if you’re listening again.

I discovered from others who tried to comment on the video that the comment section wasn’t enabled when I first posted it. With busy days, I only just got around to fixing that, so please go ahead and comment directly there this time if you do have an experience to share, as well as if you’d like to hear more sound channelings in the future. It will be easier for me to keep it separate to anything messaged here.

I’ll leave you with a question to ponder, if you feel so inclined, and perhaps journal about or just have gentle, nonjudgmental, curiosity around….

What have you wanted to do, feel, create more of, or bring into your life, but felt either too afraid to do it, others told you not to do it or that it was wrong, perhaps you felt not worthy of having it, kept pushing it off UNTIL the ideal situation was in place, or that there was some kind of lack that prevented you from freely stepping into saying, “yes?”

I know my answer…and how I’ll boldly be returning.

Sending oceans of love, magickal flow, and expansive heart blossoms of potential to you!

See you in Spring!

Breakthroughs & Epicness ~ A 50th to Remember!

As I wrote in my December 29th, 2022 post before the new year began and in response to one of the words I received after I did the 2023 mantra word exercise:

“…’breakthrough‘ carried a particular resonance to the overall energy field I sense I’ll be navigating and so for now this word is feeling like my partner.”

That was the word I also received previous to the exercise, feeling that really big breakthroughs were going to be an ongoing part of my personal experience, alongside the collective’s, and especially with my big birthday hitting. This was underscored after several breakthroughs rolled continuously in since around our time in Playa Del Carmen in May of the previous year during the Full Moon Eclipse and especially during our Friday the 13th sacred Temazcal Ceremony – similar to a sweat lodge. Another sacred ceremony activated the next “breakthrough” energies on my birthday, but I’ll get to that shortly.

I also wrote a bit about my Chiron Return that ignited this new paradigm of reinvention through an organic, energetic excavation of sorts that has been reconfiguring my inner wirings. Coupled with stepping more into my Capricorn North Node (or Cappy, as I lovingly call it), it’s all supported a definite new embodiment morphing into shape. Without needing to detail anything further with those, the flow I have been creating has truly been key to the way of experiencing it all.

And, my 50th birthday did indeed herald the next wave of breakthrough shifts and even exploded in epic proportions with widespread reach.

As you might have heard, and from what I’ve been sharing, Lake Tahoe and the Sierra Nevadas have been receiving record-breaking levels of snow. In fact, we’re now making history here with this season being second only to the record held in 1952. I believe we’re only 20 feet or less from taking first place if these snow storms continue. And the snow and moisture ain’t a-stoppin’!

There’s been so much snow that our house nearly looks like an igloo and we had to do some major shoveling work a few days ago – Dave on the roof and me on the perimeter of the house creating a path to clear away snow and ice from touching the doors, windows, and causing ice dams at the top.

Dave has actually been on the roof a few times now, as rooftop challenges presented themselves for the first time ever. But we’ve learned a new system through trial and error with it. This epic snow season has added layers to our evolution and how to handle unexpected things we’ve never had before – which results in resiliency and wisdom for the days ahead – life tapestry lessons through threads that present themselves.

The amount of snow has also, to me, reflected deep shadow energy and highlighted the hidden. How we navigate through the core water/subconscious stuff is a game changer. And these days are bringing all of that to the surface whether we like it or not. Those of you who have done a lot of work and preparation ride through such conditions with greater fluidity – mirroring water’s nature – but you may still then have others processing their own relationship to the hidden that could trigger any remnants within, in order to help you anchor that work. The snow levels symbolize the amount of collective stuff that’s been stuffed and no longer will stay quiet. What will be revealed and blossom forth from the reveal and integration is still stirring in the collective cauldron. It will be interesting to see what emerges come Spring and beyond.

I don’t know how this year’s garden and landscape around us will look when all the snow thaws and melts – it will be a surprise to see who weathered the storms and what new energies want to birth – but I do know that even with any breakage and endings, new life will surely begin again.

As I said to my dear friend, Lisa of Lemurian Rose, “it’s an epic year with new learning curves!” to which she chimed in with whole-hearted agreement and we both had a good laugh about recent unfoldings.

Back to birthday updates, I really didn’t have any expectations around it, and in fact had no plans originally as I don’t like big parties and am happy with ringing in the new more low-key and organic, but when I received unexpected news that a special guest would be coming out for it, we did pencil in some plans. But Uni – my loving word for the Universe – had other ideas, and as usual were more perfect than the mind could detail and strategize out, AND were equally supported, as long as we embraced being in alignment with the ever-shifting energies.

And not only did we come to understand this theme of empowered flow, but it pointed at initiatory experiences that were calling for greater trust, resilient flexibility, and retrieval of personal power from all the work already done. It’s about all of it being here and now already and merely needing to be consciously engaged.

I will highlight some of the experiences over the last week or so, as they may support the shifts you’re embracing too. I would like to also add how hugely moved I was by the outpour of love I received from so many of my friends near and far AND for the major courage and kindness that some key players in my local celebrations embraced and showered me and each other with….it was, again, epic in proportions and I don’t even have the words to express about what they all went through in conjunction with my special day.

Last Thursday the 23rd and the day before my sweet friend’s arrival, Dave and I enjoyed a perfect ski day with sunshine and beautiful powder. Our short drive there gifted us coyote medicine, as another beauty ran across the road and made sure to stop at the end of the crossing street to ours so we could make eye contact.

This beauty felt grounded, bold and primal. You likely recall my sharing about the buoyant shape shifter, strawberry blonde coyote who bounced through our yard with joy and elvish mischief, so coyote energy was definitely being accentuated even though each held a different frequency, and did in fact not stop there.

That perfect day and the visitor seemed to be the calm before the storm and the messenger of resiliency that would be needed to navigate potential, upcoming challenges, twists and turns, or unexpected changes. Adapting to changes definitely was our strong suit for the week and like coyote, we embraced it all with playfulness, fluidity, and a deeper strength that emerged from our cores. It was also this very Thursday night that Desiree started her journey to us, all the way from Vermont – you likely remember her from my 2021 post, A Winter Solstice to Remember.

A red-eye’s long journey went seamless through her multiple connection flights, until she hit her last flight from LAX to Reno on the morning of Friday the 24th.

That’s when the first big storm hit – metaphorically and literally.

What timing for this storm and blizzard conditions that cancelled all flights into Reno. Desiree already had about an 8 hour lay-over to wait for that now-non-existent-flight, but being that this was her very first, ever solo trip in her life, she was at the precipice of the next phase of empowered Hanged Man kind of life shifts (think breaking old patterns, fully letting go, and strengthened metamorphosis), and I was about to celebrate my own huge shift with hitting 50 and what that was bringing into my own life with clarity and conviction, what was to come next would definitely be initiatory.

We were on it right away and while Desiree was in line and trying to get info and possibilities, we brainstormed and then followed through on a miraculous weaving.

It just so happened that friends of ours who lived at the north end of the lake were in the Bay Area because our friend’s mom had just arrived in San Francisco from overseas on Thursday – the same day Desiree began her travels. That trip was kind of a surprise and not long-term planned, but they had driven to the Bay Area Wednesday, staying at their second home there for the night, just to pick her up and planned to drive back to the lake Friday because they wanted to be with me for my birthday.

So, long story short, we made an inquiry to them and this is what unfolded. All flights to Reno were cancelled for the good part of the day and flights to other places like Sacramento and Oakland (the closest options) were either booked or not timely for our needs. EXCEPT for this ONE flight Dave found online that only had 3 seats left. He immediately starting to book it and got delayed with online issues that resulted in 2 seats getting taken and Dave snagging the very last one for Desiree. In the meantime, Desiree ran to a different terminal since it was on a different flight and got to the desk just as we booked it and they printed her ticket with confirmation we gave her – last ticket available. She flew into Oakland and our generous, compassionate friends picked her up and took her to their home where they cooked her a homemade meal and showered her with nurturing and nourishment, despite neither of them knowing each other. The roads into Tahoe were closed due to the conditions and even though they eventually opened in the late afternoon, they decided it best to wait out the night and drive fresh and rested the next morning – Saturday the 25th. So, Desiree stayed overnight with them and they had a beautiful time together with so much healing support all around that ensued. Again, first time any of them were meeting each other, but became close through it all. Desiree was amazing with all of it and maintained clear energy, flow, resiliency, adaptability, and self-care the whole way, which saw her through it without missing a beat. And our friends also demonstrated incredible flexibility, changing all of their plans (they were going to leave earlier to head back to Tahoe) in order to take care of Desiree and not have her stranded.

We learned not too long after new plans were in place, that the incredible woman who was going to be facilitating a special sound healing ceremony for my birthday celebrations, just so happened to also have been in LAX the same time Desiree was – we had no idea she was coming in just for this event. She, too, had her flights cancelled and rather than wait until the next day’s flights, decided to jump in her car to try to make it to Tahoe anyway. Dave had set up this sound healing with her for Saturday the 25th, so motivated by her desire to make that happen, as well as move her own power through the circumstances presenting themselves, she wasn’t giving up. We learned later how huge the journey had been to her own evolution, providing insights and shifts to add to the equation. After 29 hours of travels for her, which included sleeping in her car and getting stopped at closed roads, she DID make it to Tahoe later on Saturday. But because of all of this, the sound healing was switched to Sunday, February 26th, making it fall ON my birthday instead of the day before. Oh UNI!!!

Originally, the day before had been better for the key players in this, but Uni had other plans and wanted it to take place on the actual day of my birthday instead – potent and divine indeed! Luckily, we were all flexible and decided to embrace all of the stuff being thrown at us with trust, empowerment, no resistance, and true surrender to the path of grace. The result being divine alignment, as when we flow with changes and unexpected surprises, rather than try to control and operate on old patterns, then we come to see how truly supported every step of the way is with invaluable gifts revealed as we progress.

Meanwhile, as Desiree had her own epic nearly two day journey to get to us – her initiatory activation of the new – Dave and I made our way to my parent’s house for the first of my sweet birthday celebrations. The reason we had this set up for that day was because that was the only day we were planning to be down in Reno, so it made it easiest to celebrate with my family while there. My parents had prepared a lot of things so we were grateful for the bit of breathing room the weather allowed for us to still get there and be with them.

We, too, had challenging conditions to get through on the roads, but because of our timing shifting with not having to go earlier to the airport to pick Desiree up, we were able to take more time and had a little less weather to deal with. Originally we were going to get her and she was going to join the birthday surprises my parents put together for me, but we all went with the new Uni plan and it worked out beautifully even though the drives to and from were still stressful. That’s why energy work is my best friend and I never leave home without it, nor ever take any situation for granted. I use it for everything and hit all the angles to make sure we got it covered. You can bet the whole week was not only showered with snow, but Reiki and energy work too! Cocreating is one of our superpowers, so don’t forget the tools in your pocket and your part in the way things play out.

And speaking of showering, on the way to this first celebration at my parent’s house we were showered by Nature with quite the show of messengers in pairs that was indeed epic too.

In the open fields of the valley we crossed through, 2 giant red-tailed hawks sat perched in very near trees, the bald eagle couple that resides in this area were sitting together in their tree, 2 herds of wild mustangs were grazing on food foraged in the snow, AND 2 coyotes were running together through the herds of mustangs. Just wow!

The coyotes for some reason gave me a feeling of the Moon Tarot card where a dog and a wolf are depicted. There’s a sense of duality within coyote medicine to me between playfulness and wisdom, conscious and unconscious/hidden elements, trickery/challenge and good fortune/resiliency, etc. Seeing the two separate, different energy ones on the days leading up and now the two together…it just kept getting reiterated in their energy and of course as we approached the Full Moon of March 7th – yesterday.

Although we were all sad Desiree couldn’t join, we felt there was something divine unfolding with these shifts we were embracing and it all would reveal itself as we kept moving forward.

Birthday party time at my parent’s was still wonderly – hehe! – and my family went all out making it perfect for me.

From the gold and teal decorations where we sat to enjoy our delicious meal and cake, to the surprise Alice in Wonderland tea party themed table made just so I could be surrounded in my favorite energy down the rabbit hole, to the incredibly thoughtful and magickal gifts, and just the pure love and joy of it all – I couldn’t have felt more loved and celebrated.

I was so overjoyed, I put on all of the special jewelry pieces my family and Dave gave me together so that I was adorned in the magick and love each held. It was also a lot of fun too and made me giggle!

My mom made my favorites for lunch and my dad made my favorite for cake! Yum-me-oh-my!

Here’s a view of the inside of the four level scrumptious and moist vanilla cake with vanilla buttercream icing and a light lemon pudding filling, alongside just a few of my special gifts that included a Titania – Queen of the Faeries ring (No joke! That’s what it’s called – I didn’t make that up! The faery my name comes from) that my parents found me.

It was very special and memorable in all ways and made the day’s shifts and wild weather and roads, balanced out with whole body and soul nourishment!

The drive home in the dark was a slow one due to the ongoing storm, and we were so glad and grateful to arrive safely back to the house surrounded in protection and warmth, as well as relieved that our friends didn’t try to make it out that night, as the passes they would have come through would have been even worse in the dark.

Good rest for all saw us welcoming a new and calm day, while our friends made it to our house around noon to marvel at all of the last two days’ interwoven experiences. We shared some tea and muffins from the Wonderland display, together, to ground everyone – as of course my parents sent us home with tons of left overs to share.

Then our sweet friends who brought Desiree to us left, and after settling in we decided an immersion by the lake would be a great welcome to Tahoe activation for her, a way to anchor in the energies, and an igniting of what was to come.

It was a beautifully calm day, which made for a wonderful walk through the snowy fields and forest, coming to rest lakeside to take in the crystalline waters of Mother Tahoe.

We followed that up with a grounding meal – all of the delicious leftovers from mom and dad, which hit the spot and helped Desiree to be a part of the energies of that day. I then got to open the beautifully wrapped gifts she’d sent ahead from her and her girls (my honorary Vermont faery nieces), which truly sealed the day with sweetness.

Everyone got some great sleep and because things had been changed up with our original ideas for the weekend, we continued playing things by ear and decided on a relaxing kick off to my new cycle morning. That included a warm and cleansing soak in the jacuzzi, surrounded by the snowy landscape. It was still calm, which was a lovely birthday good morning!

We then made our way to the sound healing ceremony, just before 1pm, ending up synchronously with our friends being right behind us on the road who drove back down from the north end of the lake. Divine timing indeed that demonstrated the tapestry we were all weaving personally and collectively.

The ceremony ended up being two hours and was incredibly perfect for all of us – some of who this was a first experience for. Without going into too much detail about it, it was extremely powerful for everyone in their own ways and for me, it was an experience of literal shift in embodiment being reflected that I had felt, but now absolutely knew.

All I’ll say is that this was the first time I did not experience tears of any kind. I usually am either moved by some kind of healing release or overwhelmingly beautiful immensity that just has to flow through. And now, on my 50th, I was in a transmutational or alchemizing space – a third point or trinity that merges and is all of it and none of it. I had many visions and journeys of which I won’t go into, but with each resounding gong, in between the crystal bowls and other instruments, that penetrated to our depths louder and louder, my aura kept increasing into everything and I vibrated so large that I felt if the gong kept going I would likely no longer have a body to return to. And still, there wasn’t tears…simply accelerated vibration.

After the sound healing, people mentioned how powerful the gong had been and our facilitator said the gong was louder than she’s ever played it…I said with a giggle, “I think that was in part my doing, as I wanted it not to stop and to keep increasing.” I also received that the Cosmic presences who were surrounding this birthday ceremony had channeled through her the necessary vibrational frequency from beyond to assist my transition.

The sound healing ended with a beautiful sacred cacao ceremony made from first generation beans she brought with her on her travels back to Tahoe and that she added cinnamon she blessed the night before to. I had mine as is, only adding cayenne to fire things up, but she had an array of ingredients for others in case they wanted something different.

We ended with a circle blessing and each person got to state their name and a word or phrase that encapsulated what they felt or experienced from the ceremony.

Mine was, “expansive.”

If all I shared so far was it for my birthday, it would have been full closure perfection, but we did end up with more experiences and days of fun, wonder, flow, wild cards, and peaceful potency to come.

While the sound healing had been taking place, the calm day turned into the next snow storm, as if the weather increased with the increasing vibrations of the gongs. So, as we made our way to a delicious and grounding lunch to seal the ceremony in, snow continued to fall…feeling like faeries dancing all around with me on my birthday.

We enjoyed an incredible vegan Mexican fiesta, which had been my choice for a birthday meal and I got surprised with another vegan cake brought all the way from Berkeley. At lunch after birthday singing and candle blowing, our friend’s mom (another powerful facilitator herself) who joined us all the way from Germany asked me what I intended for this new cycle, to which I answered clearly. She added, “Then, it WILL be.”

The snow came down more and we ended up getting home just as it really started to hit hard all over again.

I found it interesting that this birthday begins a number 8 year in numerology for me, and we just so happened to have 8 people (one person was unable to make it due to the storms and changes) at the ceremony including the visionary who led us. I was so grateful Dave put this all together and that he found the sound healer/energy medicine worker, as not only was it the perfect experience I would have wanted for my birthday, but she and I both sensed a connection without having to speak any details. I look forward to the development of that friendship with her that Uni has put in motion already.

The next day, the storm continued, which offered another slower paced morning and time for phone calls. Because of the loss of time at the start of Desiree’s trip, we decided an extension to her stay was in order, as we sensed there was more that needed to take place and layers still wanting to come forth. So, rather than leaving on Tuesday the 28th, she secured a flight to return home on Friday March 3rd. I’ll spare you the details of how that all went down, but let’s just say that this trip was one that would call up her full courage to say, “Yes” and initiate one of the biggest shifts of her and her family’s lives. Equally so, it supported all of us who were connected, to reset our lives in profoundly new ways and not turn back. In some cases, literal doors were permanently closed, and only the open horizon ahead was found on the map of adventures to navigate.

No longer could old patterns and ways run the show. We would move into a new way of alignment where trust and courage of the heart would be the guiding forces.

We decided to immerse in the snow that day and did a big snow shoe at the very top of the mountain, which was invigorating and reflected that soul climb we were engaging. The newest blizzard began and we were covered in snow!

As we headed back to our car the storm increased and held us on the road for an hour, just 3 minutes from home. A truck had gotten stuck and needed to chain up, but we embraced the time, shared snacks, and it felt like it flew by. That evening was filled with crystal activations and Astrid getting in on all of it!

The next day, the storm continued (blizzard conditions were the name of the game since Friday) – yep my birthday storm was trying to match the energy of the big 50! On this day we decided to just jump into the back forest energies and stay home-based.

That didn’t come without faery fun though and fiery-forging-ahead-energies! Blizzarding away, the landscape was saturated with deep powder, so we took turns leading the way and breaking tracks since no one else was embracing the adventure.

Snow angels, giggles, and a lot of sweat later, we returned to find the house continuing to be engulfed in snow.

Just look at the mounds and the giant icicle I took down, as it reminded me energetically of Thor’s Hammer or a giant scepter fashioned by the ice faeries for the wizards of the forest. We would prevail, no matter the amount of challenges and unexpected twists and turns thrown our way!

And we arrived at March 1st, when the storm broke, gracing us with the next 3 days of calm and sunshine peeking its head back through, as is Tahoe’s signature vibration. It was decided that a journey back to my family’s house was in order, as there was important work to be done there. So, with sunshine on our sides and the storm elementals clearing the sky, I drove Desiree and myself slowly down the mountain to receive the next phase (Dave needed to stay homebound due to a procedure the next morning). We even got to see the wild mustangs and three giant red tailed hawks, which foreshadowed an energy connection we’d learn about that day.

I’m glad we did get the chance to go down, as the experiences that took place there were written in soul contracts and the stars that were confirmed in that night’s dreams. It made sense why this gathering had been rearranged, as there wouldn’t have been time previously for what this day had in store. This included a three hour Astrology, Tarot and energy reading from my brother for Desiree, which I supported and some powerful exchanges between her and my mom (especially) and dad. My parents also supplied us more yummies with another vegan lunch and homemade dessert.

The work Desiree is doing is an example of the power each individual has to affect the paradigm shifts collectively, as one moves through the core energy dynamics we’re in process of shifting – first mending duality and then creating the new and beyond together. Therefore, supporting one another is invaluable, as it has far-reaching effects. And the shifts each person makes, supports the shifts possible for others, relative to their journey.

With each liberated movement, a new possibility is created for others to step into and so on and so forth. I, personally, feel the release take place every time I learn of and observe others moving the energy in some way. Therefore, I celebrate each achievement and deepen my gratitude for the bravery others demonstrate because it helps me to also gain greater clarity and access on how to create what’s never been created before.

It also reiterates to me the value and power of keeping to the path I feel guided to, regardless of what’s going on around me or how out of place it may look or seem to others – also despite any curve balls thrown. I love and honor when others step into their power and next cycle – relative to their path – as it frees me and others to no longer hold that space – it’s a domino effect in all directions. Beautiful and powerful stuff!

The amount of small and big signs and confirmations along the way of our week together was beyond belief and way too much to detail here. Some of it too personal to share, but even without doing, everyone’s experiences, processes, and breakthroughs are shared collectively.

Thursday, the 2nd was our last full day together and after picking up Dave from his appointment, we met up with our good friend and wedding officiate for a vegan pizza extravaganza (shared 3 pizzas in fact!), followed by a gorgeous, long snow shoe by the lake, and ending with braving his unplowed neighborhood to share time and love with his sweet, elderly dog.

There were so many memorable and belly-laugh moments to that day, which included a literal Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride to get up Reid’s street. I’m not kidding. Cocooned by nearly 15 foot high snow walls, our car “Ruby” with Dave at the helm careened through the thick snow beneath her as we all held on with exhilaration.

It was a perfect reflection of and insight to current roads we’re all traveling and navigating.

On our way back home Dave got the idea to top the week off with something different and so we headed to one of the local casinos near our home to sample the specialty vegan menu at Hell’s Kitchen. We had no reservations on this full night, but divine timing snagged us three seats at the perimeter bar looking in on the restaurant, which ended up better than being inside for talking and feeling more spacious.

And what a send-off that meal was, as we sampled several dishes and enjoyed the most incredible non-alcoholic beverage ever.

Casinos are so wildly different and outside of our norm, which made this even more of a fun dip-in and way to work the under and hidden energies. Dave surprised us with giving us each a little play money ($10 each) for the slot machines, just for kicks and giggles. So, we went about finding the perfect machines, which wasn’t hard, as we were led to three that held the perfect energy that mirrored us individually and together.

I settled on the Mayan temple energy for my round and what a round it was! We were cheering, laughing, dancing, and roaring out loud as we watched the wheels turn and light up, with win after win! I and we had no idea how to play these, nor understood what the heck was happening, but literally within 30 seconds of playing, it all catapulted into my turning $10 into just cents from $60 by the end of a few minutes – that’s $50 of winning for my big 50th birthday. Not any huge win by far, but being just a coin machine, my first try, and just minutes of playing, it all felt too perfectly aligned and wildly exciting! It made sense it would happen here with my Mayan connection. As soon as I won what seemed the perfect amount, I cashed it out immediately and to top it off, as I printed the receipt I received a papercut. We all laughed more saying it was my “blood sacrifice” for it all. LOL!

This was Desiree’s first time ever to be in a casino, alongside her first time ever solo trip, so she got a huge kick out of it all, playing a bit too, and sending fun photos to her husband to share the experience.

She won a little too and Dave told us he wanted us to split the winnings and keep it – his intention all along. He wanted Desiree to have some extra money for a good breakfast the next day on her travels home and me to have some wallet cash. Very thoughtful and sweet on his part and his intention was honored – oh Uni! Dave’s always working his magick too.

The next morning we woke way before sunrise, leaving the house at 3:40 am to get Desiree to her flight. This was the last storm-free day, so it made the journey safe and easy as we wound our way through the mountain and valley. And off she went, beginning what would be another epic day of travels with even more twists and turns at the back-end. Without detailing it, let’s just say her two-day journey ended with a powerful and beautiful bang even with the yet-again-crazy curve balls, because it was all divinely laid out for her to just go with the flow, trust, and invoke her empowerment through.

And on my way home through the still-darkness of our street, ONCE AGAIN, there were 2 coyotes that crossed in front of me and then jumped off into the forest – incredible and full circle. I slipped myself back into bed at just after 6 am and dreamed away until waking to another snow storm and blizzard coming through. Oh the timing of it all!

There were a lot of firsts over the course of my birthday week for everyone and more than I’m sharing here that took place and got activated. It was a beautiful start to my new cycle and although everything ended up being a day-to-day unfolding of our going with the flow of the energy each moment, it was perfect.

I can’t thank everyone enough, both near and far, who was a part of the beautiful and supportive energy of this special celebration with me. I love you beyond measure! An extra load of gratitude to Desiree for coming all the way she did just for me and for going all the way with her own courageous embrace of her path for herself, her family, and for us all!

I was going to post this on the day of the Full Moon – yesterday – but I’m glad I waited because an impromptu ski morning took things to the next level that day that I wanted to celebrate with you. And I’ll save this for another time maybe, but I actually now have a full helmet of magickal stickers that I completed right after my birthday – perhaps their energy has lent to the following unfolding.

As you already know from my shares, this year we’ve had an epic Winter, the snow has been epic – the best I’ve ever skied, I had an epic breakthrough right before my birthday with skiing my truly first black diamond run on my own, and then on the Full Moon following my birthday week, things continued explosive for my skiing indeed (thanks Laura for that word – you’ll understand what I mean by that at the end of this post). 

Yesterday – my 41st ski day of this season – was the first day I actually felt like a real skier, although this season has been my biggest growth as far as skiing goes, taking me leaps and bounds past where I’ve been previously. With snow conditions on all time high and me feeling great, I went next-level expansive – for me. My skiing was the best I’ve experienced – strong, confident, flowing, and then I decided to do an advanced blue run that wasn’t groomed, although I didn’t understand just how not groomed it was until I was on it. It had thick powder and the biggest moguls I’ve been down for the whole first half to two-thirds of the way, which turned it into feeling like a black diamond. In the past I would never have even considered it and the few times I accidentally found myself on runs where smaller versions of this were, I was frozen with fear and struggled severely to get down.

The difference on March 7th’s Full Moon was that I had no fear, not even a racing heart like I did on the black diamond run, I knew somehow I could manage it, and I trusted. I just kept moving forward, stayed focused, and navigated the most aligned path, even though everyone before me, around me, and behind me was falling down due to catching their skis.

Those two things were the big breakthrough realizations for me – 1. That I chose this path on my own without fear and 2. That I got down it without incident, when other seasoned skiers kept falling – what?!

Actually, two men were talking about the run as I got to the top and was eyeing it. I heard them talk about how it hadn’t been groomed and looked pretty messy with a lot of moguls. They hesitated, but then went. I followed shortly after, but one of the men fell nearly immediately. I felt bad for him, as I went by and made sure he was alright. He got up as I continued and I heard him fall again with discouragement. A few others were down, too, not far from him. I didn’t know how I was doing it, but I was continuing to flow down, feeling strong, anchored, and one with the snow and mountain even though it was steep, deep, and bumpy (that’s what moguls are). I turned around a couple of times as I continued down and the others were still struggling, which made me feel for them, as I know how I’ve felt in the past.

I couldn’t believe it and yet I could. My Cappy was truly activated and I felt strong and resilient and celebrated hugely inside for the growth that had manifested. I kept saying out loud how grateful I was and how proud I was of myself. I never thought I’d be at this point and yet here I was. No expectations. Just embracing my own pace, perseverance, and repatterning, step-by-step. It was truly incredible for me to experience and means more to me since I know my journey with this.

For me, my North Node energy has come first through my physical accomplishments, as that’s where it resides in terms of my astrological birth chart. And from here, the rest of its reach will continue to trickle out with each step I take in those other directions too.

And so the tone of this new cycle anchors, showing me once again what is possible even when you have no idea how. This biggie birthday was truly just that and more! Many of the ways are not something I can explain or feel driven to even if I could. 

I wanted to add a note here about an unusual sighting of a mouse that took place on the mountain, as it spoke to more powerful messaging I feel can be a take-away. As we were on a ski lift up, I noticed a skier below us and a little creature running around his skis where he stopped. Dave saw it too and I said, “oh my gosh, it’s a mouse!” We were both in awe seeing this little one dash out onto the snow and move about near the skier who stopped and was being careful not to hurt him. Such an odd sighting out in the day on the thick snow, but obviously meant for the three of us to see him. This was the second time I was seeing a mouse recently, as one had run across the highway one night when I went to pick up Dave from the airport recently too.

This little one appearing on the snow in daylight spoke to me of having heightened awareness and sharp senses, presence, adapting to change on the way (messenger of change), observing and considering one’s surroundings in order to navigate with greater alignment, and the hidden being revealed. This little one wanted to be seen and his deliberate timing was also his potent message.

Someone else who loves to reveal messages and adapt to change in deliberate ways, is Astrid.

As you can see, she currently dawns a new symbol on her shape shifting fur – a circle that mirrors this Full Moon.

Astrid has been doing a lot of work behind the scenes, assisted Desiree with her shifts, and has been doing tons of collective crystal energy work. In fact, she’s been calling in and directing me to important crystal beings she/we need and even ones we’ve offered and still may offer. It’s an honor to cocreate with her. What a gift this has all been and that every day continues to unwrap in mysterious ways.

And if you’ve made it this far with me, I’m grateful to you for sticking there through all that is unfolding in the world, your own challenges and breakthrough experiences, and coming along for the ride with me, Astrid, and the collective at large during epic times indeed. We are weaving the tapestry with each of our threads and the more our individual lights shine, the more creative potential we open up for us to manifest.

Where ever you are and what ever you are feeling called to bring and sing through your heart, that path you navigate is the course worth following.

“The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you really are” — Carl Jung

This was a longer update since I’m posting more sporadically these days and since I am focused on my own movement of energy within the collective – our individual pieces are ever-more integral to the whole. If all goes as planned, I’ll be away on an extended birthday celebration vacation in about a week, so I’m not sure when the next touch-in will be. Although March is a potent month collectively, it’s a quieter one on my end. Many life changes are brewing behind the scenes.

Keep an eye out on the Creations & Crystals Closet, as there just might be new additions when you least expect it. For now there are 8 pieces remaining, which include an array of wearable crystals and potent spirit animal messengers that make invoking energy easy and magickal through daily adornments – I’m surprised some are still there, as I sense their people have made a connection. All in divine timing indeed. As always, payment plans available and reserving is an option too.

And last, I’m including cosmic faery sister Laura’s video update about yesterday’s Virgo Full Moon because of how it underscores some themes I highlighted and speaks to current energies we’re navigating our parts in. We always have synchronous messages pop through even without conversing about it. In this case, “breakthroughs” and the “Moon Tarot card symbolism” were big standouts, but also how she describes this Full Moon as “explosive” and I’m tuning in with “epic”. Moon energies are felt in the days leading up and also the ones following. I listened to her video while finishing the last part of this post and kept laughing each time a word popped up that I’d already written and especially giggled when she said faery at the same time I wrote that word. She shared a giggle with me when I told her this too, as we always mirror or compliment each other. Some other little synchronous hits popped through, too, as you’ll see.

Hope these shares are helpful during these times we’re navigating together. Big love from Astrid and me!!

March Energy Update with Lee ~ Allow Love In

Happy March! While I’m not back online yet due to this full birthday week still continuing, I wanted to share Lee’s new Energy Update. That way you can get a jump start on the month’s energy since there’s a lot going on.

I did manage to get out packages from the Buds A-Blooming Birthday Bash 2/22 Crystal Offering on March 1st as hoped (all packages went out with a golden rose from my 50th birthday flower decorations so generously gifted by my mom). There’s 9 offerings of 22 remaining at the link above. Thank you so much for all the love showered on these beauties. I can’t wait for you to receive them.

I’ll be back shortly with a little touch-in update. Until then, I love the ending message from Lee, “Allow Love In.”

Until I’m on the Other Side ~ Last Post Until March & Offerings are Ready!

Another storm system just blew through yesterday and appears it will be ongoing through early March, to include being a special birthday gift to this Winter baby. This certainly has been the biggest snow levels we’ve seen in ages and I’m grateful for the enchantment it is adding to my big shift day, for the water to ease our droughts, and for the best snow I’ve ever skied in that helped me to make the huge strides I have with my skiing.

I’m still in awe of the timing for my bold evolution on the slopes that made for a perfect send off from my 40’s into a decade of number 5 beginning years – my favorite!

We experienced a very contrasting few days to the cold of this storm, as almost balmy winter temps surrounded us until yesterday.

This made for a perfect lakefront walk with expansive vistas like the ones scattered through this short post. My favorite is the first one, which made me feel both like I was walking on another planet and that there was pure, limitless potentials ahead.

I also love the icy colors, so resonant to my Pisces heart.

Walking along my favorite lake is always so nurturing and nourishing. It was a great way to breathe in the changes blowing through and continue to release anything I don’t want to carry forth into this new decade and second half of my life.

I may have more words after I get on the other side of my birthday, but for now I’m sitting with the vibration I want to embody here forth and how best I can strengthen that frequency and fully commit to the harmonic notes of my new song. I sense that I’ll be living with greater clarity and conviction as part of this shift.

This will be my last post until the beginning of March and after my birthday, as I have a long weekend of birthday celebrations igniting on Friday, and a sweet friend arriving as part of my birthday surprises.

Now that I’ve cleaned my plate, I plan to spend the first few weeks, after my birthday, immersed in the new frequencies, deep in receptive meditation, and communing with Astrid, my crystals, and Cosmic friends. I feel a ton of downloads ready to pour through that will take my focus. We also have a tropical journey upcoming, which will support this new expanse, so March may be a bit more quiet on my end while I really stretch my legs, arms, fins, and wings into this new cycle.

Synchronously, I’ve been receiving energy from a couple of super high-vibed lightning strike crystals that were recently joined with a powerhouse queen sister whose melted zig-zag lightning strike is nearly 4 inches long. So, the energies here are gently explosive since they don’t have that turn your world upside down in a surprising Tower card energy way. No, these are very different energies that are fifth dimensional and beyond.

This is the kind of shift that places the hugest a-ha within you about your manifestation abilities, your merely needing to allow rather than work hard, and the wholeness of you being right here and now – as well as the rest around you, if you can see with heart perspective. I’ve also been having lightning clarity and exact flashes of info I couldn’t have known. This feels like riding the telepathic streams and what would seem as psychic insights, but are merely about stepping into the stream rather than standing on the bank looking at it and trying to fish out pieces of info that float by.

I look forward to this becoming more consistent and fluid and wish for all of us to continue in that kind of alignment.

So with that, I continue to put one foot in front of the other and boldly move into each step with all of me.

And if you are interested in any new friends joining the path you’re walking, as promised the crystal offerings are up and ready here:

Buds A-Blooming Birthday Bash ~ 2/22 Crystal Offering

And I swear I did NOT plan this, but right after I uploaded that page, I noted there were 22 offerings! Another “accidentally on purpose!” LOL! (Update: 9 still looking for their home)

Sending you a wave of love!

See you on the other side!

Accidentally on Purpose ~ Crystals Who Know What We Can Only Trust

Tonight’s Super New Moon in Pisces (here anyway on PST and in the wee hours of the 20th for EST and the rest of the time zones) felt like the perfect doorway to share a small window look at one of our favorite things – crystals. With the intentional landscape of a New Moon coupled with Pisces season, this also adds to that expansive potential crystals so beautifully support us with on every level we may desire, along with how to bring that through the physical.

And coupled with Saturn moving into Pisces on March 7th, you may be preparing for a new personal, as well as collective era, that guides you to find strength in your vulnerability while also establishing more committed and disciplined structures to your creative and spiritual practices…in essence, grounding and integrating spirit into flesh and really living, embodying, and being able to manifest all of those wonderful dreams and inspirations. Yay!

Self care and self ritual, relative to you, will become key if not already established as vital in your life. Astrid knows how important good rest, healthy sustenance, exercise, and play are.

Staying on the surface is no longer a luxury, but you can bring forth your depths to the surface and this is actually quite needed – walking the walk of your sacred path.

Thinking of new aspects of your life you want to embark upon, heal and integrate at greater depths, anchor more solidly, or change?

Crystal beings can be your best friends and guides for the journey. Although not for everyone, more people are discovering how life can experience an upleveling when these amazing beings step into it.

From observations I’ve made, I’m seeing that many of us are feeling their call more than ever these days – even if we don’t yet know why. For some of us, their voice has never grown dim, and yet if you’re like me – you may have been experiencing a fresh wave of crystal friends joining your team in recent years, because they and we (our higher selves that is) knew what was coming and what would be needed.

There’s been a huge uptick in incredible synchronicities like never before that are taking place where crystal and human meet. The stories I hear and have been experiencing are no short of being wild – even for those of us who already have wild experiences. Some magnificent and truly enchanting crystals are coming to the forefront, asking to find their keepers like…now, calling out with laser-like megaphones (HELLOOO), and literally feel like they’re unearthing themselves because the time is here.

So many of us have crystal partnerships as part of our soul signature across the ages. Whether we specifically remember or not, their presence long outdoes our own, at least in human form. On other levels, we’re all made of stardust. And being that they literally draw upon both Earth and Cosmic energies, what splendid bridges they are to the very heart of the matter – how to integrate spirit and flesh at the clearest of frequencies possible in each moment.

They can be direct, tricky, humorous, playful, courageous, regal, impish, and undefinable….we’ve barely scratched the surface of many of them, and rightfully so, as we’re on a pilgrimage to navigate unchartered dimensional landscapes. It’s best, in my opinion, to break down the boundaries of one’s mind and never try to stick a crystal, or anything for that matter, into a box, as you’ll have your mind blown every time you do.

We have many support systems around us to assist with these changes on Earth and the transmutation of consciousness as we know it for the human race. Crystals are beacons for the coming New Age, as their wisdom is timeless and helps bridge the gap between past and future in the present. They speak to our origins and provide a stream to navigate our way back to that, and beyond that!

Wow, think of that! Beyond our origins?! Now that’s flipping the paradigms and inviting in true creative potential.

Astrid and I have been focused on and gearing up for a lot of potent journeying here, as new and old crystal friends have been emerging in our lives in a fresh way and finally have come to settle in their gridded places so the fun can begin. Some arrivals (and departures) have been both anticipated and surprising, but the crystal beings always know, even when we don’t. I recommend leaning into trusting those inner heart fluctuations and tiny voices, as they whisper of higher self guidance that the crystal family reflects like the clearest of mirrors.

We’ve been enjoying the integration process for quite some time, allowing the crystal family to discuss things together, reacquaint themselves, figure out their teams and positioning themselves for timely unveiling while we did our own personal work and preparation for the next leg of the adventure. It’s no wonder I’ve been mirroring some of the crystal beings in my newer embodiment and behaviors – for example several of my “dragon” crystals have truly inspired the fire within to take on big things with a grounded courage like never before.

Some of the preparation has also included finally being ready to reveal their names to me, which will continue in streams of downloads quite quickly I sense. The first already touched down on 2/11 in announcing herself, which I feel was the introduction we were all waiting for before everyone else would fall suit.

Meet Esmeralda.

I saw her only briefly during a scan of a large table of crystals and her imprint remained on my heart. Like with most things these days, it was a familiar surprise, but it only took that moment to see her to create a boundary to all others from the group except her. I waited, confirmed, checked in with Astrid, and we became as one, even though I didn’t really know how that would happen. There was no accident to my seeing just her, as her heart light was on purpose to ignite my own. And the rest did in fact work itself out, as it always does.

She arrived on 2/8 and the next day I heard a whisper that told me her name would begin with an “E”. At the time, I was receiving a hint of a shorter name, but it felt like how you try to tune an old radio by playing with the dial. I was getting a snippet, but hadn’t landed on the clear channel yet. Later, I realized this also indicated her nickname was shorter too. Then on 2/11 it came in loud and clear while I was engaged in things around the house, allowing my mind to become an antennae. I find that when our minds are at rest, rather than “trying,” or the left brain is focused on a task, then the right brain is free to wander the ethers. At least that’s how my bilateral operating works.

Esmeralda came through “crystal” clear in the middle of no thought about a name.

I knew right away it was her sending me her name like an arrow through my heart. I didn’t know for certain that the meaning was what I thought it might be, so I looked it up to confirm and get clarity.

Of course! Esmeralda means emerald and although she isn’t a literal emerald, she IS a magnificent, giant (about 8 pound), green chlorite phantom (with layers upon layers of phantoms in fact) Lemurian from Diamantina, MG, Brazil.

In my book, her energy is quite regal and it’s not surprising she would identify as an emerald. We all know how I constantly write about the heart chakra being the Emerald Bridge – which I received as the name that encapsulated my work/path many years ago. She has rainbows (one massive one, in fact, that winked at me when we first met), a huge time link, is self healed and her bottom is fully elestialated, creating a rocket ship effect (weeeeee!) both literally and energetically, and making her spectacular no matter which way you hold her. And as I shared with her midwife and previous guardian, Lisa, whom her giant sister resides with, “…but really which way is up or down? As above so below.” 

Even though she’s polished, her deep, deep Lemurian lines still come through. And I love how she shifts so much in different lighting, revealing new worlds at every turn.

Peering into her is like traveling dimensions, space, and time.

Her sister, Constellina (aka Radar), the giant green phantom Lemurian Mother of all green chlorite phantoms, resides with Lisa and weighs in at 121 pounds. She is a huge, otherworldly cluster beyond words, who has many babies and incredible ties to a load of potent crystals in one way or another. I’m just humbled and honored that her sister Esmeralda has come home to me. I’ve known her for ages and the time was now for the next leg of the journey. Lisa released the babies from Constellina’s pocket recently, and Esmeralda was part of that. Lisa actually refers to her as a sister to Constellina, which feels right to me too. Esmeralda looks just like Constellina, but instead of having many points, she is one giant point.

I’ve since learned that Esmeralda also loves the nickname Emma.

Emma, I learned by looking it up, just happens to mean “whole,” “universal,” or “all containing” and reflects the regal energy Esmeralda emanates, as it has “royal roots that for centuries was synonymous with regal figures”. She was very specific about her nickname only being Emma and not Esme or Emmy, or any celestial type of name.

Even though she’s a heart bridge between Earth and Cosmos, she’s very clear on having a more Earth-based name that reflects her high frequency, but maintains grounding. This is because she holds the vibrational keys for creating a New Earth – hence assists in both personal and collective work.

Anyway, there you have her – well, just a start to her, that is. She deserved a larger introduction, although we’ve but only cracked open the door to our partnership and work together. She’s busy preparing the space and working with everyone here to set up the next steps. Her place is directly to the right of where I sit at my desk, so we can see each other and work together daily in partnership, while my other cocreator, Astrid, lays by my feet. Together, we create a Trinity.

I introduced her to Astrid after I made my first connection with her. Astrid had been napping and when she saw Esmeralda, she immediately welcomed her, but then took steps back and stood for a while in reverent silence. Two powerhouses re-meeting, and both sharing their respect for one another, giving each other the space needed. You can see that in the photos and short video below.

Astrid has been very, very active recently in telling me what crystals she/we need here and tuning in very specifically. Because of this, I have to take my time checking in and communicating to understand clearly who is to join. I don’t always know why, well most of the time I don’t lol! But Astrid is the navigator of the unknown and I’m to trust in her and what I feel from the crystals, despite not being given details. I’m on a need to know basis only.

The same recently happened with a smoky elestial amethyst that arrived on Winter Solstice, accidentally on purpose. This was her Solstice gift from me and she absolutely LOVED her new friend, as you can see in the photos.

Astrid is a master crystal worker so I listen to her guidance and desires on what crystals to bring into our lives, how to work with them, and which ones she particularly wants to work with. And as you can see she didn’t miss a beat beginning immediate work with her new friend. This crystal is amazing and in the form of a pyramid – one of Astrid’s favorite shapes – well both of ours!

I placed it on the ground and she came over right away, ending up spending a half an hour in deep communing and integration with it. She especially enjoyed having it placed on her crown to commence the ritual ahead. She laid her head with chin nuzzled over it as you can see, moved it in place and eventually laid with it tucked under her. Eventually she was laying flat like a bunny loaf and stayed there chattering her teeth and purring while she worked.

I shared a video of it on Instagram, but didn’t save it to add here. The photos, above, I think demonstrate well enough.

Astrid the master alchemist has been holding space with her crystal family for the changes moving through our lives and tweaking the fine threads that hold it all together. She works energy like no other and I learn so much by tuning into the tendril frequencies that run between us. I love her silver-tipped twinkle toes from which the energy she runs through her is evident in her presence. Reinvention is at hand indeed.

These are just some recent snaps I’ve taken of Queen Astrid with her crystal brethren. It’s an amazing thing to experience with her in person. Just as it’s always been to be in the presence of my soul family in rabbit and tortoise bodies over the years. Their masterful ways are incredible and never fail to produce chills in me.

And that brings me to the last crystal story I briefly wanted to share, for now. We have so much unfolding here with the crystal collective as well as new downloads, doorways finally opening, stepping stones like a yellow brick road appearing, birthday preparations, and so forth that just a few highlights were jumping forth to share as a way to help frame the transformations at hand and perhaps reflect something simultaneously for you.

So this next share is about the transformative adventure of an incredible singing Lemurian laser wand. Again, this being was so meant to be with me, and held on until I could find her – clearing a path that only made her seen to me. She’s an 11 inch long, rainbow filled, super clear pristine beauty that feels to have a collective of faeries living inside her.

Anyway, this beauty made her journey to me, and as soon as I saw the package I just knew something had happened, even though she was so well and lovingly wrapped inside. Actually, truth be told, I had a feeling something might happen so it wasn’t surprising upon learning that reality. When I opened the box, I discovered she had broken in half on her travels.

Now, if you’ve been following along for a while you may recall my post from 2012 – When Crystals Have Accidents – which happens to be one of the two top blog posts of all time here, generating nearly 200 comments over the years, many private emails, and blog reposts.

The gist of the post is that crystals, like us, go through growth spurts, transformations, and shifts and that life is about the experience. We have an idea of perfection in our minds, but perfection is however the experience unfolds.

Because of my experience with crystals over the years going through changes with chips, new growths, breakage altogether and so on, I learned what this meant and to embrace what ever the experience was showing me – then applied the same to myself. I also learned that every situation was different and therefore, tuning in was the way to receive answers.

So, when I discovered my amazing new singing Lemurian laser wand had broken in half, while there was some human mourning, there was also a seamlessly simultaneous celebration – like a death and rebirth all at once. I just knew there was a reason this happened and that she had purpose to her experience. The major break also felt to mirror the ending and beginning taking place in my own life, and that reinvention at hand.

This Lemurian was so closely connected to me, there was no doubt she and I were going through the same experience and this is also why this was the only wand of several sisters that had waited to be claimed. Our energy signatures were a match.

Fast-forward, I wasn’t sure what was to happen next, but was going to wait until she told me, or I received the answer.

Was she wanting to remain in two pieces for the journey forward?

Or, did she in fact want to be pieced together into a new form?

Her break had been nearly perfect with only the tiniest little slivers that chipped near the break. So there was a pretty clean cut that severed old and new for sure.

I decided not to do anything for a while and to see what would come to me without trying.

And it did, through Astrid.

I placed the two wand parts on the floor next to her (actually with them at a 90 degree angle to each other), feeling she would have an answer for me, and Astrid immediately started tuning in. And then the next thing that took place was wild.

It was evident what she was trying to do, in the only way her rabbit body was able to. The clear message came through her intentions and actions.

Astrid started to push the tip with her nose, grabbed the point with her teeth, and began to move them back into place, the best she could. I got huge chills, as I could hear her saying, “We need to put her together. She wants to go back now.”

Astrid did an energy shake of her head, which I caught in motion, above – confirming it was alright to help her and it was up to my human hands to now do the rest of the mending for her rebirth.

I knew I got my answer, but I still waited quite a while before I actually DID do that. Normally I wouldn’t have, but this was different. Each experience has its own journey and can’t be contained in a box of interpretation until explored individually. I then received in answer that she had deliberately done this both to break from the old version of herself to create a new one, AND because there was purpose to her harmony that the break would support.

Now, I can’t remember having heard her sing or what her tone was before her coming home to me (although I knew she did) and we weren’t sure when she broke, if she would in fact sing anymore, but I heard her say there would be depth to her song with the new form, and having cracked open, she was able to let go of the old and rigid energies, and breathe in new life with greater expansion.

So, I finally took her two wholes – as I didn’t feel she was broken, but now had two perfect whole aspects of herself we would be uniting to make a third – and mended away.

And guess what? When I struck her with my other smaller sister Lemurian singing wands, I heard at least three distinct tones.

Did she have only one before? Two? I don’t know, but my sense is one or two of these were newly created BECAUSE of her willingness to let go and recreate. She took what others would have seen as damage and redefined beauty and harmony BECAUSE of her willingness to experience life, and be okay with humbling herself into a space of embryotic renewal where leaving her mastery behind meant new mastery awaited!

Her breaking at her heart center allowed expansive depth to pour through and recreate a new and limitless love. Much like what I’ve been writing about recently and also demonstrates how the peaks and valleys of life are what enrich our lives. To know both the light and the dark is invaluable. Sometimes you have to be okay with deconstructing in order to recreate and build something more resilient.

She is singing a new song that helps one to journey through true creative potential, accidentally on purpose.

And this was a repeating theme, as I also had another powerful and balancing energy crystal recently rebirth too…in the case of this one it was a mother and child crystal and the baby literally just slid off into my hands when I picked her up. She’d been intact upon receiving her and for a while, and then one day – perhaps and likely mirroring my own rebirthing time at hand – she released with ease into the world.

Maybe one of these stories, crystal beings, relationships, or life experiences speak to you in some way. We’d love to hear any thoughts or comments you’d like to share.

And if this is your first time exploring the possibilities of crystals and new perspectives on personal growth, then we thank you for sticking around and entertaining the potential that there just might be more than you thought was going on through the little experiences in your every day life – perhaps unfolding accidentally on purpose with beauty and grace of their own.

May we honor all beings in all forms, as they are ALL powerful souls…not just the human ones.

A little heads up:

On 2/22 I will be posting/offering some special, enchanting, supportive, and potent crystal friends at our Creations & Crystal Closet page. I plan to announce it again, but just in case, you’ll know ahead. These will include a grouping of both personal releases and personally curated crystals that I have been guided to offer and only now have had time to put things together for you – well, I’ll get up what I can in time for now. In part, they are in response to requests from people who have been wanting some magickal friends and support for things they’re going through, and who in general just would like some extra magick in their lives and sacred space.

People often reach out that they’re not quite sure where to look, where to start, or so sweetly have shared their trust in pieces that come through me. There will be standalone pieces and sweet little bundles that I felt you’d love and hold some gentle, but powerful energies – I always try to find a broad range to serve different purposes and budgets – some truly faery-filled, some powerful cocreators, and others great for gridding too. You’ll see! There will also be a small collection of crystal pendants/necklaces that are also both personal releases and personally curated for you. The curated ones are some favorite stones of mine that I myself wear a lot of and thought they would be supportive to offer. The personals are out of this world, but just as with some crystals, these crystal pendants are ready to move on and continue their work where they are most needed.

There will, as always, be some amazing, little, surprise gifts included in every order and I may even offer a surprise bundle. We’ll see! I never know what’s coming through, but it was clear over the last several months from messages and nudges, that I would open briefly during timely windows to being a bridge for my friends – that’s the crystals AND you!

Also, there will be payment plans available if needed, as I always like to support intentions when the call is heard. So, if you do see/feel something that speaks to you when they become available, don’t be afraid to reach out so that I can reserve something that is meant for you.

And now I would like to end with a moment of silence in honor of Dave’s stepdad who transitioned, making his way back to the stars on 2/15…..

I’m grateful we got to spend some fun family vacations with him over the years – including some ski trips. Both Dave and I had some incredible connections with his stepdad on the day he passed. Mine was empathic through my body, which messaged he would be passing that day…and Dave’s was a beautiful connection that I believe helped him to pass with ease.

Holding the good memories at the forefront and feeling the continued wave of interconnected energies as souls move on these days to places where they can better support the shifts. It’s not easy, but the more we connect through our hearts, the more we can help one another through it. We’re grateful he was at peace in his transition, surrounded with family and in the place he loved with those he loved.

Feeling the bridge strengthen between the opening veils ever-more strongly these days.

The Peaks & Valleys of the Creative Process

The video below is from a talk given by the multi-talented singer, songwriter, record producer, and actress Lauryn Hill to high school students back in 2000 that journeys through creativity and spirituality in its themes. It’s a great talk in its entirety, if you ever want to listen, of which I’m sharing this just over 10 minute clip from. The whole 10:26 minutes is really wonderful, but I was particularly taken by what she shares in response to the question at 5:30 because it mirrored so much of what my take-aways have been recently from the skiing journey I’ve been using as a metaphor in my own life. It also speaks to why creativity at its best, is not to be rushed, as the in between phases are truly where the magick lies.

There’s no randomness to why this clip found me yesterday, and so I thought to share the alignment of that synchronicity in a blog today, as Lauryn so eloquently and simply expresses the concept I had shared in my own way in a recent blog. It feels like a supportive message to reiterate, as it speaks to the places we find ourselves descontructing and reinventing as individuals and a collective right now.

Again, the whole video is great, but if you want to skip to this part, you’ll see what I mean. The question is at 5:30 and the actual answer is around 6:00 minutes.

In those last four plus minutes she describes the creative process and how it needs to include experiences that teach you.

Given my mountain ski experiences, I especially resonate with her metaphor of life as peaks (mastership) and valleys (learning/study) – getting to the top of a mountain with mastery, but that once you’re on top you have to go down again, which is the learning or studying experience. Staying at the top of the mountain, or trying to hold onto the mastership there, will get you stuck. You can’t stay there forever and have fresh substance and depth to your creativity, so you will need to descend with trust and let go of everything you know, which brings you to the foot of another hill or mountain that you then learn how to navigate differently, ascend, master, and so on.

These are the excerpts from my blog post that her eloquence mirrored in my own way of expressing it:

Skiing has become a metaphor for so much and a guiding force for the fresh path I want to carve.

For me, growth isn’t about the climb up the mountain, but how to get down. This equates to the deconstructing process in order to rebuild. There are fears and unknowns to journey through when you are removing the comforts of what you’ve always known. The steps aren’t clear, therefore the way down is one turn at a time.

To go further asks for a total flip of perspective on progression. Rather than finding the positions of accomplishment to be defined by “higher,” they are simply new positions that might also require going “deeper.”

I face the downhill with the same patience and presence the uphill climb involves, taking it in stride, with no pressure or time frame to fly at top speed. The snow makes the terrain a fresh journey layered over an old one, and this is how evolution looks – integrating old and new on a whole new level.

Love is…A Page from My Journal of the Heart

Another Love Day floats upon snowflakes into our hearts this Winter season and again reminds us that every single day and moment is an invitation to open our hearts wider, share more love, and deepen into the vortex of feeling – the space where transmutational potential lies.

I thought I’d share a few of the things that love stirs up in me and that of course includes my loves! They deserve an extra mention on this day, as just one sweet way I can highlight Love Day, which in my book is every…single…day…I’m alive.

To give love, feel love, share love, spread love, experience love, is the breath of life, in my book, and any way we do that – be it with others, through our passions and gifts, with the Earth at large, or with ourselves, love is always something we can never have enough of and thank goodness there’s never any limit to it either.

So here are the loves in my daily life sharing a little love celebration of togetherness, fun, synchronicity and potent energies in recent days, helping to make today’s share a little bit of a gratitude journal for them being a part of my journey and daily experiences.

Of course, I have many other loves – including extended blood and heart family, friends, creative passions of my own, and things at large in the world that span all of the elements too! Know that you are all receiving a love bomb from my heart! I see you and am grateful for each and every one of you, and each and every experience made possible because my heart beats.

Here’s cutie number one. Dave.

Although we really do our best to embrace each day, Dave and I decided to have an early Valentine’s celebration on Sunday with a date lunch and outing. Check out that sweet little “Love” gnome connecting our hearts and stealing the spotlight!

We also enjoyed some delicious giant, vegan, Belgium chocolate covered strawberries I found us to indulge on. Mmmmm! Strawberry love bombs indeed!

After a yummy Thai lunch, we thought we were headed to our local symphony performance, but discovered the date had been changed when we arrived at an empty parking lot. Lol! No worries, we water signs adapt, so we’ll head to the rescheduled event next Sunday and decided to replace the symphony with a movie at our local theater.

We haven’t been to the movies in several years, and were really happy we waited to watch the new Avatar movie – The Way of Water in 3D, as we both loved it. There were only four other people in the theater, so we felt like we were in our own special viewing. It couldn’t have been more perfect for this “Water Rabbit” year, two water signs, the Winter season, and to underscore some collective messaging it held. The movie is three hours and nearly 15 minutes long, but neither of us felt we were there that long, as the entire movie just “flowed”.

We didn’t know we’d be watching this movie, but I just happened to be wearing my sparkly “water and forest nymph” inspired earrings a friend custom made for me and was draped in shades of mermaid colors. The earrings were the perfect blend of energy for the movie since the characters move from being forest dwellers to water dwellers.

It was a simple day out, but all really enjoyable and made for another day of gratitude.

And we concluded our day watching another movie back at the house with our sweet little family – this threesome who awaits our return home and LOVES family time.

Valentine’s Day wouldn’t be complete without mentioning the love and bond shared with our fur babies and best friends. They are no different to us than human children and friends, and in fact are the greatest guides in my life.

And since I haven’t shared photos of Sweet Pea and me together, I decided she should get a spotlight being loved on by mom. We took these together before Dave and I headed out for our early V-Day.

She’s a complex little one, who is very thoughtful and tuned in, sensitive, and a nurturer. She’ll pretend not to care, but she cares A LOT!

Then we all know the infamous Boojum for his wild and wacky ways and the love affair he has with his momma! He’s never too far, always wanting to be right under everything I’m involved in – including breakfast!

“How could anything be more important than me?” he says.

And of course there’s this girl…the one and only Queen Astrid.

Ta-da! This picture speaks for itself.

I’ve shared before how “Astrid demonstrates the importance of leaning into love and how you can never have enough of it. I agree wholeheartedly and have seen this work wonders in my own life. While she is a strong force who stands in her power, she knows that her true power comes from opening more to love.

I can’t express how much she’s offered her vulnerable heart to me since first this became her home. Yet now she seeks me out to both give and receive love, knowing how softening into being nurtured means our bond creates a stronger light and life force. It is also the alchemy for transformation on so many levels.

She knows that love is strength and we are only weak when we cut off the heart’s desire to merge with mission. Together this creates wisdom and grace.”

And of course, she and I share a love and alchemical bond with our crystal family, and they’ve been helping to navigate this new, expansive terrain of heart and mission merged. A perfect highlight for days filled with love!

So I’ll end for now with this photo taken just a little over a week ago at my parent’s house.

This is me and Chamuel, the Master Lemurian that resides at their home – one I gifted her years back. This amazing one channels Archangel Chamuel whose name came through my mom upon working with him. He is the last of my giant crystals still with us.

He truly helps you drop into the power of your heart, the peace and harmony possible, and how to be a bridge for unconditional love through all relationships you have – including other and self.

I hope you can feel the love beaming from his heart and mine – together! And that you will take a moment to acknowledge and share gratitude for the things in your life that stir your heart to love even more – even if that is simply and powerfully YOU!

Chamuel feels like the perfect way to end today’s share, but segue to the next blog installment that I sense will feature Astrid, crystals, and some crystal offerings from our hearts to yours.

May you feel the love that you are and know that it is present in everything within and around you – whether you can see it or not.

Where you are triggered, love is the voice crying out from that pain.

Where you feel warmth, love is the voice asking for more kindle to that flame.

Whimsical Wednesdays Dragons & Mythical Beings: Releasing Primal Patterns & Revealing Dreamscapes – Part 3

I found it quite synchronous that I stumbled upon this post today, just two years and ONE day later. How’s that for timing? When I reread the dream at the beginning I got the strong nudge to reblog it for its collective messaging – not just my own. There’s so much in it that I feel reflects so much currently taking place and some supportive words toward that. It was also interesting that Faery sis Laura had reblogged a post herself today titled Synchronicity and Inner Guidance, to which I immediately texted her because the opening paragragh dream tidbits directly reflected things in my own life that were too ironically funny not to share. In any event, I feel the underscoring of paying attention to signs, messages, intuitive nudges, and also to the thoughts and feelings you are carrying and speaking moment-to-moment.

Tania Marie

Today’s blog post concludes the intuitively guided series of connected dreamscapes that felt important to share, as they are layered with coded messages beyond what I’m even reflecting in interpretation. I’ve been sharing them after having integration time and letting them process behind the scenes, so in fact today’s dream is actually one I had on the night of Tuesday 2/2/21 of last week. You can read or revisit Part 1 and Part 2 at the links provided.

This dream is a little bit different and also connects my most recent sacred tattoo design project I’ve been working on, as you’ll see – I love how everything is always interconnected and aligned in timing.

On 2/2 the dream took me through a sequence of really big magick happening. I can’t even begin to describe what all was unfolding, but it was layered and all-encompassing, spanning across the Earth collective, but…

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The Black Rabbit Made Me Do It

Holy rabbit cannoli!

This was me on 2/7 (my brother’s birthday) and day 33 of skiing for the season – the biggest day of my skiing journey yet!

To say that it being the 33rd day was auspicious enough, and on my brother’s special day after I had just talked to him – the person who’s encouraged my Mars energy for years, this day also took place after adorning my ski helmet for the first time with stickers, on a day I was on my own, and just 19 days away from my BIG birthday.


Again, this share is for all of you who have ever had a fear, are in process of learning something new, have felt frustrated with an endeavor, or simply are in transition from one phase of life to another.

While Dave was recently away on his heli-skiing adventure, I was having a helluva ski adventure of my own – a milestone to reflect my milestone birthday.

I didn’t have it planned, nor did I ever even think this day would happen, as I’ve been just flowing with being in my zone and with the occasional uptick in exploration. Well, Monday kicked in the start of the biggest stretch of that pilgrim-of-the-Cosmos within me, which then took it to Capricorn new heights Tuesday.

I already shared about the initial shifts with my skiing journey that I now realized started on 1/31 – my mom’s birthday! Must be something about us edging toward the Pluto in Aquarius energies in March that we get to experience before full blown transformative Aquarian years of the same, because both my mom and brother are Aquarius and I have two planets in Aquarius including Jupiter. So fortunate things come through Aquarius energy for me.

That’s a lot of stuff, which in simple terms speaks to an opportune alignment of beneficial energies in my world.

There was also something about this Leo Full Moon on the 5th that added extra oomph to things. We had another snow storm here that started the night before the 5th, but kicked in full gear in the wee hours and first half of the day of the Full Moon itself.

At the house we got another nine inches and there was like two feet at the highest elevations.

I read somewhere that the Sierra snow pack is currently the highest it’s been in thirty years. So, we’re definitely having quite a Winter, which has been supportive for my skiing evolution, since the good snow supports the leaps I’ve been taking.

I took these next photos on the night of the Full Moon, just before bed. Everything outside was aglow. It was so beautiful I went to different windows to snap shots at back, on the side, and front of the house. Our neighbors across the street have lights on their home, so there was a feeling of Christmas still, but the sky was just so – something! I love how the light makes these look like black and white photos. These were taken without flash – that’s just how bright the Moon is on a snowy landscape.

Dave had taken off on Friday the 3rd and taking him to the airport meant time at my family’s house so we could have an early birthday celebration for my brother.

On the way to the airport I saw the bald eagle for a second time, which I’d mentioned in an earlier post just days before. This time Dave got to see him too. I am familiar with his tree and have seen a pair perched there before. I was happy Dave got to see him too, feeling to me a confirmation of a great trip for him.

I told my parents about the bald eagle and the pair I’ve seen on that tree on drives to and from Reno. Upon leaving their house I said to them, “I wonder if I’ll see the pair again on the way home.”

And of course, what do you think happened?

I did!

The pair was in the same tree where hours before Dave and I had seen the one.

I also saw my wild mustang friends and twelve hawks, as well as an amazing pyramidal eye sky portal.

I only managed to safely get the above photos, but I felt so supported into the days following that I would have to myself.

After a deep clean, refresh of the entire house and reorganization and rehoming of my crystals, which involved gridding them and placing them where they could do their best work, I got a lot of good time to myself to ignite things.

The fresh energies and what has been created here with my crystal family is out of this world. We – Astrid and I – are ready to blast off! Everything has been kicked up ten notches and the feeling is potent beyond anything I’ve experienced yet.

And then, the beginning of what I started this post off with began.

Monday, I decided to go skiing on my own and went up for just an hour. There’s something about getting out on the lifts and mountain that is refreshing and peace-inducing to set the tone for the day, and then there’s the independence factor of going out doing something less familiar, with bravery riding along in my pocket.

It was a perfect day of sunshine, no wind, great temperature and awesome new powder. These factors, along with my feeling really good, everything working in unison, and the energy on the mountain being peaceful, aligned to kick in day one of stretching my rabbit legs.

Oh! I forgot to mention that on Thursday I decided to remove the manufacturer stickers on my helmet and the long-time Ace of Spades on the front that people have come to know me by. I remembered I had some rabbit stickers and so I placed three of them on the helmet in front and on both sides, and on the back top I put a Moon with ferns sticker (not shown).

The rabbit in the red scarf on front is from a friend I met on Instagram and fellow rescue rabbit mom and artist – who used to be a tattoo artist – Kate Davies whom I also have a couple of precious rabbit prints from that are framed in my and Astrid’s room.

Anyway, this seemed to go along with my colorful new ski apparel – some of which have rabbits riding along on the inner tags – as well as my courage to be seen out on the slopes as myself.

It hit me later, how perfect it was that the black rabbit was front center, being that we’re in the Year of the Black Water Rabbit!

So, here I am on Monday feeling good wearing my rabbit helmit for the very first time and my pants with rabbits on the back. And as I approach a run I’ve only seen from the lift, I wonder.

Could THIS be the day I try it?

It actually looks pretty wild even from the lift and many times isn’t groomed, but on this day it was groomed and the snow was great….and T was feeling great.

I stood at the edge looking down. Standing tall, with composure, and taking in everything around me with all of my senses like the black rabbit at the helm of my forehead. The name of the run includes “Chute” and it really is just that. It narrows and funnels along these rolls of steep hills, one after another, and kind of shoots you out. It’s a Blue (intermediate run), but an advanced one, which I would say parts of it are Blue/Black.

Needless to say, away I went and did it!

I hadn’t ever tried it before and never with Dave. I always thought it just wasn’t for me. It was an unknown, but I went for it.

And guess what? I made it just fine. No falls, without fear, and actually enjoyed it.

When I got to the bottom of the run it meets at a junction to a Black run right next to it. I took this photo to show Dave so he could see what I did.

You can’t actually see the crazy run I did because it’s hidden by the trees to the left. The one to the right is the bottom of the Black run. But I knew Dave would know where I was and could only have gotten there by doing one or the other. LOL!

While I stood there, I eyed the Black run on the right – of which again that’s just part of it – and placed the thought in my back rabbit pocket.

But boy was I proud of myself and wondered about the rabbits on my helmet upon my head – the part of my body associated with Mars energy. That black rabbit, standing tall and leading the way, with her scarf flying in the wind.

Had she planted the seeds of thought in my head, grateful for taking her out to play in the fortunate Black Rabbit energies of the year?

Once again, I had surpassed my latest achievement of the most advanced Blue run I did with Dave AND on my own just days before.

I returned the next day, Tuesday, for another jaunt out on the mountain wearing my ski thumpers and rabbit attire.

As usual, I allowed the day’s energy to dictate my flow, feeling into everything within and without. The snow was still in great condition from our weekend storm and my heart felt so too.

I did a couple of runs to see how everything was working and how the energy of the mountain felt.

I then decided I would just take a peak at that Black Diamond run that conjuncts at the bottom with the one I did the day before. This is actually one of Dave’s favorite runs that he does all of the time.

I told myself, “I will just go look and see what it’s like and how I feel standing there. I can always turn around.”

This was the view.

It’s quite different looking at these runs in person from the top and bottom – photos seem to skew the depth, but you get an idea.

Black runs are considered the most demanding and for more experienced skiers….OR those who dare.

I guess I dared that day. Or the Black Rabbit in me did.

I stood there for a few minutes with my rabbit senses on full blast and then I saw myself slowly flowing down the top of the run.

I knew once I let go, there was no turning back. I had established the path was forward and one way or another I would need to figure out a way through it. It was a leap of faith – of ultimate trust in myself that I had my own back and would get myself down.

I got about a third of the way down and stopped to snap the first photo this blog kicked off with, as I just HAD to document the unprecedented event. I was a bit nervous to take it, as standing on such a slanted edge and bracing myself with just my skis is kind of not the norm feeling. LOL! But there we are (in the photo) – me and my Black Rabbit companion, navigating the way from the cockpit of my third eye.

Then I continued on.

So far so good. This isn’t so bad, I thought. Wow, I’m doing it.

I got about half way where it plateaued a bit and you can’t see over the edge unless you’re standing at it.

Well, that’s where things changed.

Up until that point, I could see the terrain I was navigating, but this terrain ahead was one I could not see…until now.

Since I had never done this run before, Dave had never told me about it since I never thought I’d be doing it, and you can’t really tell from the lift what it’s like – even though you better believe I scoped it out on the way up JUST in case this rabbit girl decided to do something REALLY out of the ordinary, I didn’t know how it flowed.

Now I did.

At this point where I stood looking over the edge, it was REALLY steep. Not that the rest of it hadn’t been, as the past me would never have wanted down any of what I just came through.

Okay, this is what Black Diamond means. The next section I had to get down, to me, seemed as if it was nearly vertical.

Now, if this had been me at any other moment but this day, especially the me from before this season or even a few weeks ago, this is the kind of run I would have either sat down and cried about, refused to do and taken my skis off and shimmied down, or would have had a few unpleasant, terrifying falls from – all the while being petrified even to move. So all that I just said may have just played out in my mind like a horror movie while I remained frozen.

Not only was I standing at this crazy edge, but I was without Dave near by in case I fell and needed help up – as falling on steep runs is REALLY hard to get up from on your own.

But, the Black Rabbit was with me or perhaps WAS me. The Water Rabbit who rules this realm and knows just how to flow with it.

It just so happened that nobody came down this hard part while I was facing it and so it was like a time-out-of-time present that opened up just to encapsulate me in this momentous experience.

I didn’t stand there for more than a minute and away I went, as I knew if I overthought it, that wasn’t going to help me. I had to lean into trusting myself.

But I was not without a racing rabbit heart going faster than ever before and some really hard breathing. I instinctively got low like a rabbit and tucked into my turns, finding myself moving through them pretty fluidly. I wasn’t able to go the really slow speed I usually like to do, because of the steepness, so I had to just keep going, staying on high alert with all parts of me in synchronized coordination, and…trust.

My heart raced faster and faster…the fastest I’ve ever felt it…and I knew I really was a rabbit in these moments. I was feeling that rush of adrenaline that rabbits do when the fight or flight hormone kicks in and increases their heart rate like crazy.

But I kept going and even though fear was acknowledged to be hanging out, my higher self took over and held fear’s hand. Rather than fear leading, another part of me took over the reins and said, “not this time – I got this.”

Who was that? It was an unfamiliar voice and presence. Very different than even the one that has gotten me through other things in the past. This voice had a power, but grace…ungraspable, yet oddly grounded, and almost hovering in the in between.

I felt buoyant on the snow, like it was keeping me afloat, and not once did my skis catch a falter. Tuck and turn, tuck and turn. My heart continuing to race at a rate that seemed inhuman or at least not capable of being sustained in a human body. It was rapid like the speed of light pulsing through me and that IS me.

I thought I might have gone out of body during this part of the experience, but in fact I now feel that a switch was flipped into the next phase of me – my Capricorn North Node light went on and it took over like cruise control while my racing heart became the catalyst.

It went so fast, like I might die from how fast, that it actually tripped a switch and made this moment, THE time.

I leapt into the vortex of the unknown and came out the black hole into a whole new world or what felt like one, looking through new eyes. I literally felt like I had traveled through a near death experience, similar to one I’ve already had, where a new me emerges from the experience.

I got to the bottom of that super steep part and stopped to the side, while other skiers and boarders came down behind me. I felt strange, in a good way. Not myself, but more myself. My heart was still racing and my body was integrating what took place. I actually stood there on my skis for a good five minutes before moving again. I kept looking at the run I’d just come down, feeling what this world felt like with all of my new parts, as if I’d just landed here from another planet.

I acknowledged the present and voiced deep gratitude.

This was my view of the bottom part of that run with violet light streaming through the trees. Again, a much more skewed perspective than what it really is.

There was an almost shock-like peace within me, unable to comprehend what just happened, but also knew explanation would pale to the actual experience. I just kept standing there, breathing and allowing my heart to return to a more normal pace, integrating the energy that had fully emerged from the birth canal and was feeling out the landscape of this new capsule it arrived in, and continuing to look at the run behind me – where I left an old piece of myself.

It all sounds kind of dramatic for what is quite a normal experience for many people, but things some take for granted can be life-shifting for others – it’s all relative and any moment can be a hinge-point to someone when things are in alignment.

I can’t really explain what happened on the mountain that day, but whether one understands what took place for me or not, there’s a bottom line to what I do know and that is, I got down the hardest, steepest run of my life without incident – a Black Diamond.

I had only once done a Black Diamond when we were on our ski safari in Colorado, but it was considered an easy Black that was more Blue (the reason I did it). And I didn’t get down it quite like I did now.

That was the ending to my day, as I felt no more need to do more. I simply kept breathing in the reality of what took place.

I’d gone up the mountain one person, and came down the mountain quite another person.

When I shared what I’d done with Dave he was wowed and expressed how proud he was of me – big time! He even mentioned that he couldn’t believe I got down that bottom part. He told me that even when he gets to that part, he’ll stop to make sure others aren’t around and that he changes the way he skis between the first part and the end, as the steepness calls for a different approach.

That all spoke to what my rabbit instincts had kicked in to do on their own.

When messaging with my sweet Capricorn friend KC who has been my Cappy hand-holder – she’s the one who got me up and down the Grand Canyon steep ledges – I said:

“Holy cecotropes!” – (for those of you who aren’t rabbit parents or know about this, these are cecal pellets or partially digested food/nutrient-packed dietary items that rabbit’s pass to eat and are essential to good health – they look like poop/feces, but aren’t) 😉 And continued to share what I did, to which she responded in part with:

“Oh my gosh who even are you?!! Wow! Good freaking job T!!! Lucky rabbit year!! Woot woot!!”

And she was right, who was this person who just did that?!

A new T indeed.

And how auspicious to have this take place just before I step into my 50th year.

Black Rabbit Birthday Bonanza indeed!

Taking things to a whole new level….again….and getting my Cappy ON!

So much keeps coming together seamlessly, including the matching energy of things here at home to create the space supportive of my new home I’ve landed in within.

My office/shared Wonderland room with Astrid has shifted a lot with the new gridding of crystals and especially a new INCREDIBLE addition to the family who sits to my right (I may share about her another time), while Astrid sits by my feet – where they both are as I type this. I’m awaiting the arrival of some special crystal babies that have appeared in dreams for my birthday to share with Astrid and the rest of our little family here to support this new cycle.

Interestingly, the day after my leap down the mountain, quite the visitor leapt into my experience.

On the morning of 2/8 I was enjoying breakfast when I heard Boojum, our black cat, making odd howls and chirps behind me. I turned and found him sitting by the window, looking down. I knew he was seeing something, so I got up to look at what it might be.

When I peered down at the snow covered yard I found a very plush and healthy looking messenger. She looked half fox and half coyote, so it was hard for me to tell at first which she was. Even that tail of hers was so fox, but I’m pretty sure it was a coyote although love that she felt like a hybrid. Her coat had a lot of tawny red in it and then smaller areas of tannish gray. I did read that coyotes can be strawberry blond and this one was definitely that. But it wasn’t only the way she looked, but the way she acted that REALLY got my attention.

She looked up and saw me, then almost like a little elf, she immediately turned with glee and literally bounced with joyful and graceful leaps, as if the snow underneath her was a cloud she pranced upon. I have never seen a coyote do this. She bounced in big strides with all fours touching the snow at once, just like you see deer prance and bounce along a field or a rabbit binky effortlessly. It was as if her feet barely touched the snow before she sprang up and out again. And she continued this for yards upon yards with no change in her gait.

It was quite the sight and so rare, because not only have I not seen this, but never seen a coyote in our yard since we have a fence. But the snow level is so high that there’s only inches to a foot between the levels on either side of the fence. So this coyote literally bounced her way in and out.

She was light as a feather and buoyant as can be, as I watched her bounce her way across the yard, then over the fence, and continue bouncing all the way into the forest. There was so much lightness, softness, and yet power in her energy. She had the presence of a shapeshifter who was much more than meets the eye and used Boojum to alert me of her arrival.

I only wish I had videoed it because it was fantastic! And it was like a living experience that mirrored the exuberant golden bear of my dream who wanted to share that powerful, alchemical joy with everyone. Wow!

Coyotes, of course, do symbolize playfulness in life, fluidity, and even sudden changes. I’ve read that they appear when you’re being initiated into the next phase of spiritual growth.

I later noticed that she had visited my office, and perhaps looked in on Astrid, as her paw prints led to our room.

I managed to grab my phone as she made it to the edge of the forest. And once she was hidden in the trees, she stopped her bouncing. You can catch a glimpse of her in the distance below.

She actually turned back before disappearing altogether, as if to make sure I got the message.

Later that night, as I drove down the mountain to pick up Dave at the airport, I saw another odd sighting. It was a small mouse running across the highway to the other side in the dark cold. She literally shot across and my headlights lit her up nearly like an apparition, as she safely reached the snow.

The sense I got was that from the dark abyss of pure innocence, something new and fresh was springing forth. It may seem small at first, but the impact potential was fertile and rich.

And all of these recent experiences feel to echo what I wrote about the heart chakra and love in a recent blog post:

Love always awaits our presence. And it’s not a fluffy kind of love, but a unifying cosmic force that both hovers in a space in between and dances like crystalline snowflakes all around the energy field – potent, but untethered, grounded, but mutable, still, but boldly all-encompassing even in the tiniest of reflections.

I found this heart in the snow a few days ago on our deck – a grounded heart made out of pure, mutable, frozen water. It also happens to mirror the energy of a dream, and a nearly exact looking crystal that’s on its way to me through some wild synchronicities.

Life definitely keeps reflecting the infinite potentials available, even when we think there couldn’t possibly be more, that there isn’t another way, or that something seems impossible.

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