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Life is Both Fragile & Miraculous

Life is both fragile and miraculous.

I’m reminded of the miracle that each day presents us, as I think of all the things we take for granted and cast aside in favor of a race towards something more.

The breath I take, the way every cell in my body communicates to the others and knows just how to work together in synergy, the tiny heart beats of my little ones, how a baby grows within a mother’s womb, how I can choose anything I want in any moment to feel, how gravity allows me to walk on the Earth’s surface, the crystals that sit in front of me that somehow grew into these amazing Earth jewels, how each bird knows their own song, the way the seasons come and go, how Earth renews herself, how my plants shift from day to day and vegetables and flowers grow overnight…all of this and SO much more are miraculous experiences consistently happening in and around us.

Last night I received a message that a friend of mine I’d met in Bimini, 2009 on my first trip there to swim with the dolphins – who just so happens to interestingly share my same birthday of February 26th (different year) and is a fellow artist and spiritual healing arts facilitator – has been struck down with a rare and highly aggressive inflammatory breast cancer with bone metastases that has rapidly been wreaking havoc on her body in all ways. She’s only in her 30’s and lives quite a magickal and joyous life with her husband on one of the Hawaiian islands.

Healing prayers and support are going out to her to provide her soul with opportunity for another miracle in what ever way she chooses.

This reminds you of the fragility of life and while she may have her own soul path, which she only knows, it’s a strong nudge for having gratitude on all accounts and living each day with conscious awareness and from your heart’s joy.

In this way, you get to experience the richness of life always and get the most out of your time here on Earth. And when your time comes, as it will for all of us, you will be able to ride that wave with peace in your heart, feeling fulfilled.

~

So many souls continue to move on these days both in human and animal bodies, as a new paradigm reality is anchoring.

How do you want to be living your life while you ARE STILL here on Earth?

If the emotions you’re feeling are not fueling the life that truly would bring you peace of heart and soul, then maybe it’s time to move through them so that you can feel what’s on the other side awaiting you.

Holding on to and blocking your energy with anger, regret, repression, disappointment of what you don’t think you have, holding grudges, wishing for personal justice, drowning in sorrow, sadness, competitiveness, needs to prove yourself, holding yourself back until some perfect scenario happens…..isn’t going to create what you want, although has been the growth opportunity created to help catapult you into a greater, deeper, and richer experience of you.

~

sunflowersMy two Heirloom Mammoth Greystripe Sunflowers, which I planted from seed and transplanted from my Garden Tower out front, have flourished. One of the plants is 41 inches tall. It is actually holding up quite well on its own, although I noticed some drooping starting, so I harnessed it to a large stake to ensure it keeps reaching up to the Sun with ease.

sunflowerOne has fully bloomed, just yesterday.

sunflower3And the tallest one is just opening today. She’ll probably be in full bloom tomorrow.

Sunflowers are my favorite flower and it’s been incredibly fulfilling to grow these two beauties from seed.

sunflower2It’s my first time ever growing things from seed since my Garden Tower arrived and I also decided to plant some things out front. My Moonflowers and Malabar Spinach (from seed) are also growing well in the front yard, although are on a slower trajectory than the Sunflowers.

They have all taught me even more gratitude and daily presence, not to mention have anchored in more natural harmony with Nature and her cycles.

It’s also made me very aware of my own cycles and has all been very in sync with the big changes in my life. (I knew that my Sunflowers would bloom before I left here) 😉

I’ve supported, nurtured, cultivated, and watched how my plants have flourished and yielded their bounty, how some have had more challenges and needed more care, the passing and turn over of new growth, and the excitement and abundance of the natural beauty of Nature in her glory.

It’s the same with our lives and how we can support the cycles we pass through.

~

I haven’t decided yet on how long I have on Earth, and at times that has fluctuated greatly depending on how fully I choose to engage this reality.

All I know is that right now I’ve committed to an all-fulfilling ecstatic experience of living from a new found place of complete soul freedom.

And this is something I am engaging in fullness each and every day I choose to be alive in this body.

Nothing else matters except this.

It’s not about how much money I have, the things I own, a status to achieve, how many people I know, or even who I know. It’s not about having to prove anything, nor about needing to be approved of. It’s not about having the support of people believing as I do, or trying to change anyone. It’s not about being afraid to be me in all my quirkiness and bold differences. It’s not about how I look or if my body emulates other’s ideals. It’s not about superficiality on any level, so that I’m left with emptiness when alone with myself. It’s not about doing as many things as I possibly can cram into a day, but instead about doing the things I truly want to do with quality versus quantity.

Today I live each moment from the fullness of my heart without any regrets and with peace of soul that has no fear of what the next moment may bring.

Life is both fragile and miraculous.

Authentic Self-Acceptance: Recognizing the Great Deception of Spiritual Enlightenment

Often, when we become more spiritually enlightened, we can easily convince ourselves that we know it all already.

We become very adept at using all of the spiritual terms and concepts we’ve learned, to talk our way through things on the surface and yet haven’t a clue how to actually integrate and embody that, let alone understand that we aren’t really seeing the depth of the picture – we’re merely spewing out the “right” words we think we should use.

Ironically, we can actually become closed off to widening our perspectives even more because we think we have all the answers, or we feel the need to pretend we do so that others will see us in a certain light.

It becomes much easier to deceive ourselves or play subconscious, self-sabotaging games than to accept that we may actually have more available to us to learn, which can help us to continue to heal and evolve.

This is a great reminder from Shakti Gawain (below) about authentically embracing who you are right now with vulnerable integrity.

I share it, as I see it as one of the themes in the collective pool to be conscious of so that we can widen and deepen our potentials, while also continuing to raise the bar on our vibrational frequency we are embodying.

From Shakti Gawain:

What I am right now

If we pretend to be more enlightened than we really are, we will miss an opportunity to heal ourselves. Admitting our limitations can make us feel vulnerable, yet it is very freeing.

We just have to be ourselves as we are now, accepting the mixture of enlightened awareness and human limitation that is in each of us. Through this self-acceptance, we find a deep peace and self-love.

* Today I accept myself as I am. *

It’s Time

It's Time

 

This message and image so perfectly capture and mirror the essence of our journey in Peru. Wow!

Thank you to Christopher, who shared the journey with us, for sharing this image and quote with me.

Feeling really invigorated and hugely empowered upon returning home. I will be sharing the experiences we had with you this week. So stay tuned. Just getting myself integrated back.

Much love to all. I hope everyone had a beautiful Equinox and is feeling the power of this now moment to create anew from your wholeness that you are.

Consistency

Consistency….

Do your choices reflect your deepest values?

Do your words, thoughts, feelings, and actions reflect your beliefs?

Do you compartmentalize your life and behave one way in certain environments, and a different way in another?

Do you walk the walk and fully practice what you are speaking?

Does what you teach in the professional setting reflect also in your personal relating or even in how you write (post), comment, and respond in social media and casual public forums?

Are you emulating rather than embodying?

Can you be honest enough with yourself to recognize and admit where there are inconsistencies – small or large?

And then can you be loving enough to gently nurture yourself into aligning a little bit more each day with you?

There is no judgment, only love….

A love so deep for yourself that you create peace within and without, through harmonizing these inconsistencies with gentle nurturing.

Your vibration will be stronger.

Your message more powerful.

And the vibrancy of your light will shine in rippling frequencies that will ignite illumination where ever you are.

Making Waves

making waves

Soaring Spirit

soaring spirit

 

Don’t think in terms of comfort; think in terms of freedom. Don’t think in terms of safety, think in terms of being more alive. And the only way to be more alive is to live dangerously, is to risk, is to go on an adventure. And the greatest adventure is not going to the moon – the greatest adventure is going to your own innermost core. ~Osho

The most adventurous journey to embark on; is the journey to yourself, the most exciting thing to discover; is who you really are, the most treasured pieces that you can find; are all the pieces of you, the most special portrait you can recognize; is the portrait of your soul. ~C. JoyBell C

The Quest To “Be Of Service” Can Become A Disruption To Your Life

 service

Something that I often hear from people is that they feel they need to be doing something more, they are in constant search for the “bigger” service they are “supposed” to be doing, and they seek these answers in all the outside ways they possibly can, awaiting to be told the magick answer and/or to arrive at some glorified outcome.

There is this heavy self-judgment these people carry of feeling they are not doing and giving enough, sometimes self-sabotage in not recognizing what is already before them, and lack of gratitude and enriching satisfaction that isn’t being realized, which comes from the journey itself…not the arrival.

The mind throws these thoughts at you of not being “there” yet – where ever “there” is – and so it creates all of these false pretenses and illusory time constraints that create anxiety and throw you off balance, resulting in missing out on the here and now.

And in the midst of it all, they deny themselves of receiving, which is where more giving is able to come in. They are also in this constant working “at” it phase, rather than focusing on remembering the connection within to Source is always present.

Yes, you may be what is known as a “lightworker” and yet there are so many attachments to definitions of what that means and how you must appear or live up to that role and mission.

Don’t allow this to become a deterrent, obstruction, or disruption to your life. Relax into the perfection of where you are in this moment and start to shift your perception to embrace a wider picture of how you ARE already being of service, giving so much, and living out the current role of that along your journey.

There is this tendency to idealize only certain roles, positions, and “work” as being of service in this “lightworker” way.

There is the tendency to play the part, but not actually “be” the part, in order to try to “look” like you’ve arrived somewhere that doesn’t even necessarily exist.

There is the tendency to have envy towards others in roles you feel equate to these definitions, and to deny yourself and others any worthiness of the roles you uniquely have that play out in different ways.

There’s a tendency to negate all of the ways you already ARE sharing your gifts with the world.

And there’s the tendency to jump quickly into something before you are ready, to fulfill these “needs” and then wonder why nothing feels different, why nothing is happening/manifesting, or why you have the same, if not more challenging things to manage because you jumped too soon.

Service is a word that is deeply misunderstood, I believe. Especially when it comes to the realm of “lightworkers” because there’s a tendency to glamorize it into a certain category, which is idealized in New Age communities of thought. And then, people throw everything to the wind and begin to judge themselves, their lives, and each other, for not living up to these “ideals”. Not to mention, immediately want to run to create this “service idea” into a business model.

I often hear people saying, “I want so much to be of service to everyone, the world, and I have so many gifts to offer.” Then they either set out on a quest to find the answers to what they need to be doing to fulfill this mission and/or start prematurely diving into creating a whole business plan and business cards to start passing out.

That may work in some cases where people have been consistently doing the work, but to truly be of service, it is something you embody, rather than a role you play and it can evolve, but likely is already taking place exactly where you are right now. And once you start viewing your life in any role you are in, as being of service, then things will naturally evolve into the next phase of the journey rather than forcing yourself into wearing a costume that simply won’t feel natural to yourself and to the people you are trying to be of service to.

You can be of service as a cashier at the grocery store, as a good neighbor, a mother, father, sister, or brother, as a sales rep, co-worker, librarian, best friend, or a hermit living in a cabin off in the woods….It’s about how you interact with life and every living embodiment of consciousness that shares this experience with you – human, animal, plant, mineral….

We’ve spoken of ego before, but there is also spiritual ego that is quite prevalent even when we think we’ve moved beyond all of that and are now in our “service” roles. Spiritual ego plays out in many ways, which includes the “I want to be of service” and rushes into all of the business planning to start creating the role for that to play out in. Yet, if you initiate this too soon, you may find yourself rushed into something that you either are not ready for, or find that you don’t attract any responses from.

It’s not something to judge, if in fact this has happened, as it’s a gift and message that is helping you in not doing something prematurely. Remember, anything you have within you that isn’t yet integrated, is exactly what you will attract in the clients and people who come to you for work.

Life saves you FROM things you’re not prepared for, or will SHOW you exactly what you’re not prepared for. There’s no need to force things and try to prove something because when you step out of alignment with your natural timing, you’re going to experience things to teach you so that you can get back into alignment.

That’s not to say that there aren’t times perhaps that you hold yourself back and can step up things in terms of more responsibility. It’s merely to say that if you are consistently operating from embracing gratitude for being of service at all times in your life, regardless of what role your work takes on, then things will seamlessly shift and there will be no separation between your work and your personal and every day life.

What’s most important is to live your life CONSISTENTLY with undefined love and compassion, honor, accountability, humility, and service. And that involves how you relate with, speak to, greet, and interact with every single person in every situation along the course of your day, every day – always seeing them through eyes that recognize their reflection of yourself and all of humanity and how they, too, have their own journeys and challenges that are within your potential to energetically shift in that split moment of interaction, both for yourself and them.

If you truly want to be of service and live a life of service, you have that ability and opportunity right now by living this, without need for a business model. Although your work may naturally take that form at some point, or evolve even from the work you currently are doing in this vein. Again, your life and work need not be separate or judged as lesser or greater than.

This is part of the reason I’ve shared with people that ask me if I have a meditational practice, that my life is a walking meditation. I simply don’t see the separation anymore. Everything is an extension of who I am in the moment. And although I’ve taken steps and created processes to get to this more seamless experience, after a while, it becomes natural and without need for deliberate separateness. No part of life is different than any other, if you are embodying and being.

Whatever job you currently have (especially a non-spiritual one) is an opportunity to be of service to the people around you and that you interact with through it. And in fact, it may actually be the most enriching way to learn to be of service, as you are being prompted by a variety of situations that likely trigger you in challenging ways, and those challenges are the perfect training ground to truly be loving, to demonstrate listening integrity, and learn humility.

Challenges are not to be avoided, but to be transmuted.

When you live in service to everyone, no matter what “job” you have, you will naturally attract people who seek your gifts through the genuine encounters you have daily. And that happens without need for a business model, as things will naturally evolve from there.

Chasing after or forcing anything is a clear indication that it either isn’t the thing for you, or you’re out of alignment and the timing is off. When you are in your natural frequency of emanating and embodying the qualities of service, that come from an authentic place of being loving from the inside out, you will draw to you, your vibrational matches.

Life becomes that of living in anonymity and without thought of what you think all these ideals need to look like. You relax into your life and recognize all of it as valuable and integral.

Life becomes abundant because you release attachments to what abundance is supposed to be, and you learn to serve the world through your natural expression, rather than aspiring to serve the world by some definition of that.

And even if you spend a lot of time alone, you are still being of service, as the person you are serving right now, is you. And, by embodying that example, you are vibrationally reaching the collective.

With perspective shifts, your whole life shifts, and you live with more deliberate knowing and enrichment, which then will evolve seamlessly, consistently, and divinely.

Accountability to Embody ~ Making Changes with Essence Integrity

rumi wise

 

I’ve learned that I simply don’t want, nor can afford, to put energy into things and experiences that no longer serve, and truly aren’t aligned with, what I’m guided to create from the essence of my natural frequency, as that not only affects my well-being, but my ability to be of greatest service for the highest good and to people who are also taking accountability in their lives.

Realizing where my time and energy would be better focused for that greater good supports embrace of Divine timing and flow of all things to take place, which creates that magickal alignment.

This also creates the basis for profound change that comes from within and stems from a more natural alignment with what is core to me, rather than a displacement of my desires to be in that alignment.

Like some of you, I have felt guided to withdraw physically from many things in order to actually be able to give more, which is through my own transmutation into who I am in essence.

This has involved, and will continue to involve, a lot of life readjustments, reorganization, review, and release, in order to focus on what is of most soul-benefit right now to be engaged with. It takes me on a journey through the shadows, as well as the light, so that I may bring a fuller depth of understanding to the choices I make and the creations that therefore will birth in greater wholeness.

One of my only outlets of connection, besides my work and personal life, is via this blog, where I share much of what feels important, inspiring, and creatively supportive to impart.

I share a lot of my personal journey whether literally or symbolically through my blog, as a means of support to others that I know go through similar experiences and might feel alone in that process, or like no one understands it.

It’s okay to change your mind, it’s okay to find new inspiration, and to admit you are feeling stifled even in the role others may respect and admire you for being in currently. This is a sign of growth and natural evolution. And as you let go of those “roles”, you are able to walk through new doorways of experience that provide the opportunities for expansive breath into new freedom that perhaps is less defined, but more expansively amorphous to what is energetically reflective of the nature of now.

I’m quite the shape-shifter that embraces change and I am willing to put that out there when it shows up, as I believe that change is the natural process of life and the one thing you can count on always being a part of it, whether you embrace it or not.

I’ve shared before that it has become increasingly important for me to shift gears and to let go of a lot of things that feel complete at this time in many areas of my life. This, in order to embody more of my essence and consciously create a new paradigm of experience I am called to, knowing that as I do so that it is the most responsible, accountable, and service related thing I can do by extension of BEING this.

This reflects in the expression of my creative life force/work I am called to do and also the life choices I make. So you HAVE seen, and WILL continue to see a lot of shifts in these regards from me.

For me, my original soul missions have and are coming to closure, which leaves me with expansive choices to make from a different essence place of myself. That is both exciting and can also invite much unknown that calls for greater courage, deeper trust, and full-on heart immersion, since this opens a wider realm of possibilities where things are revealed only moment to moment, as well as shift moment to moment.

That wasn’t quite the game before, as I did have foresight and an understanding of what I had set out to do. Now, I am really creating anew and in a state of reclaiming sovereign free will on a whole other level.

Much of what has been evolving for some of us in integration lives, is closure to a lot of what we originally set forth to accomplish, if in fact we’ve been doing the work. This has been happening increasingly since the last couple of years. And yet, in many ways, the realization of that hasn’t caught up for some, and in other ways some are caught in a perpetual, one-directional spiral, not realizing they have the ability to create a new spiral expanding out in many other directions.

And still yet for some, perhaps there is a place of comfort you’ve “arrived” at and are ceasing to stretch yourself into another level of evolution that has been nudging you.

Of course it’s well deserved to take a rest and break after much work I know many have been doing. But complacency and that sense of “arrival” you may have been pursuing, can be a hindrance not only to your own growth potentials, but to the collective at large.

Personally, I don’t feel okay with being complacent and just because I get to a place where I become really good at something I’ve been doing for a while and what people come to expect or connect me with, I know it is not for me to stay there, and to continue to step into another level to deepen and expand my experience, as well as to be of greatest service to others through that process and embodiment.

That may not be the case for everyone, but for me, this involves recognizing the time for allowing others to take over in some ways, and assisting them in that process to do so, and to move into another role of bridging things from the radiance of my “beingness”, which I nurture by supporting what is true to it.

Things are ready, and will become ready, BECAUSE of your willingness to release into more of who you are and into what seem like new realms, but truly are the most natural, core expressions of you.

In this way of opening to more possibilities and limitless expansion, you create doorways for others to access the same.

And this involves changing the inner landscape so that it is aligned with all that you hold dear, rather than focusing on the outer ideals you are trying to live up to, convince yourself you are reflecting, or feel compelled to project change ON to.

The inward journey of embodying who you really are in this moment, and bringing that forth, rather than trying to emulate what you feel you “need” to, or “should”, be doing – trying to come up with an idea that you try to fit yourself into – can be exasperating, draining, disappointing, and in the end will not produce the results you desire because they aren’t consistent with who you really are. This will be felt by others, whether consciously or subconsciously, and will also draw to you the energy that reflects this inner inconsistency.

It will also defeat your efforts to create change around you, as if you are not truly embodying that which you desire to see changed in others, you have already set yourself up for disappointment.

I believe that one of the greatest fears is to admit that we may not be who we really think we are. The same fear that others are demonstrating in not wanting to change in the ways you desire, is the fear within self that isn’t able to reconcile a similar inner discrepancy.

I think that what would be valuable to the process is a willingness to be honest with ourselves, to be open to honest feedback from others and their reflections of our inconsistency, and to be mindful of the type of energy we are putting out there.

I think a willingness to accept when it’s time to move into a new level of you is key and this can reflect in many ways, adding on dimensions and layers to what you currently do, or completely shifting into new aspects of yourself most currently reflective. I feel that the willingness to let go of control in any one area that we’ve attained or become good in, recognizing timing and how others are now capable and ready to step into those realms can be very beneficial. This will assist in living from true abundance and connection to your collective family, whom will be grateful for your honoring of their ability to step into their new roles you may be leaving.

I know there are times you may feel the need to be all things and master it all now, and yet we each have different and constantly evolving roles that are there to be honored throughout the course of our journeys, as well as carried out by others when we have a greater personal calling and better use of our gifts elsewhere. I’ve also seen the scarcity and ego mentality of people claiming certain attainments, that are unwilling to support others into their fullness or to help them to take over some of the positions they hold or may have held, as there is an attachment and fear not just of wanting to hold on to that status, but of fear to move into a new role where at first it will again be new in feeling and like starting from the bottom. This can all end up revealing a potential, false abundance mentality that has not yet truly been embodied.

Yet, if truth be known, in actuality the new role you release yourself into will be the most natural and most expansive you’ve experienced so far, if you can get past that old fear pattern that yes, is still hanging on, regardless of the conscious claims you make.

Because, let’s face it…it’s scary to move beyond something you know really well, right? But a little healthy fear is the catalyst for great change. It’s not the enemy…it’s indication of your desire for the new (or rather, indication of the more “you”), nudging you to get all your parts in alignment for the inevitable.

And imagine now, if you will, the people who are on their beginning phases of their more conscious journey, or in their own transitional phase into the next change, then.

Remember how it may have felt to you before you got to where you are now feeling very comfortable, and remember how you feel now if you in fact are being nudged out of your comfort zone to yet ANOTHER new leg of your evolutionary journey? When you remember this feeling, maybe you can then share a bit more compassion and let up on your desires to exert effort outside of yourself so that you’ll have more energy to put toward your own changes, which will reflect so beautifully for the people who will benefit from your desires and efforts embodied, rather than projected.

As one door closes, another opens…and the doors you close, are the opening doors for others, and vice versa. We are always in a connective process that triggers a collective domino effect. So when we make courageous choices to change, others are simultaneously ready and able to do the same.

Life is always an experience of wholeness….we are both leading and following, teachers and students, changing and awaiting change, fearing and desiring change…. at the same time. If you can stand in the place of acknowledgment, and detachment from identifying solely with any of these, then you can just be with the process naturally.

We each affect change and provide a catalyst for each other, but it stems from what is taking place within and then embodied, inside out. We are all on different journeys and different places along those journeys. Increasingly it is becoming important to act responsibly, consciously (awareness is power), and to be accountable for what you embody, as well as seek from within.

Make the changes that are true to you and not some idealized version of you, or as an act of defiance, or guilt. And if you don’t yet know what that is, then make a commitment to start listening more so you can hear the subtle voice of your truth amidst all the “noise”, which can be both obvious and not obvious.

“For those of you who have exited your cocoon, your new mantra is, “Change is not Fearful.” You have perhaps focused on either emotional or physical issues and now you are likely moving into the opposite to learn that change is not fearful – just a ‘new normal’. There will be a time when change will be perceived as joyful. But for now, you’re learning it just is.”…..

“Some of you wish to stop a bit and learn how to love yourself. That is fine and good. Love is key to new earth. But part of that self-love is accepting your shifts and those of others without many, if any, visible changes.

Perhaps you expect those of the light to have some sort of halo about them so that you can tag them as important to your transition. In searching for that halo, you have listened to that channel, meditated with that teacher and drifted from thought to thought – hoping this or that person is the one who would anoint you as of the light. Just as your parents once told you that you reached certain stages in your life by allowing you more freedoms and responsibility.

You look for parents or community members to tell you that you are growing, shifting, changing. When in truth, they know as little as you do about this shift. There is no guru or parent to give you the parameters of the new you – there is only you.”

~Brenda Hoffman

 

accountability

Shine True ~ Shine Compassionately

stars

 

Just because something works well for others does not mean it will work well for you.

We are all on different paths and the embodiment we’ve individually chosen has a different purpose for each of us to emanate.

Don’t be afraid to create your own way and to shine your true nature.

Equally so, cultivate unconditionally compassionate understanding and honor for others on a different path whose purpose is to shine their uniqueness as brightly as possible.

We may be unified at our Source, but Source is unlimited.

Live By Authentic Example

water ripples

 

The example you live in fullness will have the greatest impact and reach than anything else you try to do to create change.

YOU living at the highest personal and whole frequency you can, consistently and in the integrity of YOUR heart’s truth, will energetically ripple out and ignite the same in others to live from their authenticity.

We AREN’T here to be duplications of each other, but we ARE here to each live as fully as possible, the expression of our part of the collective.

When we each do, this is what creates the harmonious symphony that celebrates each empowered instrument of expression collaborating in the journey.