Holy rabbit cannoli!

This was me on 2/7 (my brother’s birthday) and day 33 of skiing for the season – the biggest day of my skiing journey yet!

To say that it being the 33rd day was auspicious enough, and on my brother’s special day after I had just talked to him – the person who’s encouraged my Mars energy for years, this day also took place after adorning my ski helmet for the first time with stickers, on a day I was on my own, and just 19 days away from my BIG birthday.

Shazam!

Again, this share is for all of you who have ever had a fear, are in process of learning something new, have felt frustrated with an endeavor, or simply are in transition from one phase of life to another.

While Dave was recently away on his heli-skiing adventure, I was having a helluva ski adventure of my own – a milestone to reflect my milestone birthday.

I didn’t have it planned, nor did I ever even think this day would happen, as I’ve been just flowing with being in my zone and with the occasional uptick in exploration. Well, Monday kicked in the start of the biggest stretch of that pilgrim-of-the-Cosmos within me, which then took it to Capricorn new heights Tuesday.

I already shared about the initial shifts with my skiing journey that I now realized started on 1/31 – my mom’s birthday! Must be something about us edging toward the Pluto in Aquarius energies in March that we get to experience before full blown transformative Aquarian years of the same, because both my mom and brother are Aquarius and I have two planets in Aquarius including Jupiter. So fortunate things come through Aquarius energy for me.

That’s a lot of stuff, which in simple terms speaks to an opportune alignment of beneficial energies in my world.

There was also something about this Leo Full Moon on the 5th that added extra oomph to things. We had another snow storm here that started the night before the 5th, but kicked in full gear in the wee hours and first half of the day of the Full Moon itself.

At the house we got another nine inches and there was like two feet at the highest elevations.

I read somewhere that the Sierra snow pack is currently the highest it’s been in thirty years. So, we’re definitely having quite a Winter, which has been supportive for my skiing evolution, since the good snow supports the leaps I’ve been taking.

I took these next photos on the night of the Full Moon, just before bed. Everything outside was aglow. It was so beautiful I went to different windows to snap shots at back, on the side, and front of the house. Our neighbors across the street have lights on their home, so there was a feeling of Christmas still, but the sky was just so – something! I love how the light makes these look like black and white photos. These were taken without flash – that’s just how bright the Moon is on a snowy landscape.

Dave had taken off on Friday the 3rd and taking him to the airport meant time at my family’s house so we could have an early birthday celebration for my brother.

On the way to the airport I saw the bald eagle for a second time, which I’d mentioned in an earlier post just days before. This time Dave got to see him too. I am familiar with his tree and have seen a pair perched there before. I was happy Dave got to see him too, feeling to me a confirmation of a great trip for him.

I told my parents about the bald eagle and the pair I’ve seen on that tree on drives to and from Reno. Upon leaving their house I said to them, “I wonder if I’ll see the pair again on the way home.”

And of course, what do you think happened?

I did!

The pair was in the same tree where hours before Dave and I had seen the one.

I also saw my wild mustang friends and twelve hawks, as well as an amazing pyramidal eye sky portal.

I only managed to safely get the above photos, but I felt so supported into the days following that I would have to myself.

After a deep clean, refresh of the entire house and reorganization and rehoming of my crystals, which involved gridding them and placing them where they could do their best work, I got a lot of good time to myself to ignite things.

The fresh energies and what has been created here with my crystal family is out of this world. We – Astrid and I – are ready to blast off! Everything has been kicked up ten notches and the feeling is potent beyond anything I’ve experienced yet.

And then, the beginning of what I started this post off with began.

Monday, I decided to go skiing on my own and went up for just an hour. There’s something about getting out on the lifts and mountain that is refreshing and peace-inducing to set the tone for the day, and then there’s the independence factor of going out doing something less familiar, with bravery riding along in my pocket.

It was a perfect day of sunshine, no wind, great temperature and awesome new powder. These factors, along with my feeling really good, everything working in unison, and the energy on the mountain being peaceful, aligned to kick in day one of stretching my rabbit legs.

Oh! I forgot to mention that on Thursday I decided to remove the manufacturer stickers on my helmet and the long-time Ace of Spades on the front that people have come to know me by. I remembered I had some rabbit stickers and so I placed three of them on the helmet in front and on both sides, and on the back top I put a Moon with ferns sticker (not shown).

The rabbit in the red scarf on front is from a friend I met on Instagram and fellow rescue rabbit mom and artist – who used to be a tattoo artist – Kate Davies whom I also have a couple of precious rabbit prints from that are framed in my and Astrid’s room.

Anyway, this seemed to go along with my colorful new ski apparel – some of which have rabbits riding along on the inner tags – as well as my courage to be seen out on the slopes as myself.

It hit me later, how perfect it was that the black rabbit was front center, being that we’re in the Year of the Black Water Rabbit!

So, here I am on Monday feeling good wearing my rabbit helmit for the very first time and my pants with rabbits on the back. And as I approach a run I’ve only seen from the lift, I wonder.

Could THIS be the day I try it?

It actually looks pretty wild even from the lift and many times isn’t groomed, but on this day it was groomed and the snow was great….and T was feeling great.

I stood at the edge looking down. Standing tall, with composure, and taking in everything around me with all of my senses like the black rabbit at the helm of my forehead. The name of the run includes “Chute” and it really is just that. It narrows and funnels along these rolls of steep hills, one after another, and kind of shoots you out. It’s a Blue (intermediate run), but an advanced one, which I would say parts of it are Blue/Black.

Needless to say, away I went and did it!

I hadn’t ever tried it before and never with Dave. I always thought it just wasn’t for me. It was an unknown, but I went for it.

And guess what? I made it just fine. No falls, without fear, and actually enjoyed it.

When I got to the bottom of the run it meets at a junction to a Black run right next to it. I took this photo to show Dave so he could see what I did.

You can’t actually see the crazy run I did because it’s hidden by the trees to the left. The one to the right is the bottom of the Black run. But I knew Dave would know where I was and could only have gotten there by doing one or the other. LOL!

While I stood there, I eyed the Black run on the right – of which again that’s just part of it – and placed the thought in my back rabbit pocket.

But boy was I proud of myself and wondered about the rabbits on my helmet upon my head – the part of my body associated with Mars energy. That black rabbit, standing tall and leading the way, with her scarf flying in the wind.

Had she planted the seeds of thought in my head, grateful for taking her out to play in the fortunate Black Rabbit energies of the year?

Once again, I had surpassed my latest achievement of the most advanced Blue run I did with Dave AND on my own just days before.

I returned the next day, Tuesday, for another jaunt out on the mountain wearing my ski thumpers and rabbit attire.

As usual, I allowed the day’s energy to dictate my flow, feeling into everything within and without. The snow was still in great condition from our weekend storm and my heart felt so too.

I did a couple of runs to see how everything was working and how the energy of the mountain felt.

I then decided I would just take a peak at that Black Diamond run that conjuncts at the bottom with the one I did the day before. This is actually one of Dave’s favorite runs that he does all of the time.

I told myself, “I will just go look and see what it’s like and how I feel standing there. I can always turn around.”

This was the view.

It’s quite different looking at these runs in person from the top and bottom – photos seem to skew the depth, but you get an idea.

Black runs are considered the most demanding and for more experienced skiers….OR those who dare.

I guess I dared that day. Or the Black Rabbit in me did.

I stood there for a few minutes with my rabbit senses on full blast and then I saw myself slowly flowing down the top of the run.

I knew once I let go, there was no turning back. I had established the path was forward and one way or another I would need to figure out a way through it. It was a leap of faith – of ultimate trust in myself that I had my own back and would get myself down.

I got about a third of the way down and stopped to snap the first photo this blog kicked off with, as I just HAD to document the unprecedented event. I was a bit nervous to take it, as standing on such a slanted edge and bracing myself with just my skis is kind of not the norm feeling. LOL! But there we are (in the photo) – me and my Black Rabbit companion, navigating the way from the cockpit of my third eye.

Then I continued on.

So far so good. This isn’t so bad, I thought. Wow, I’m doing it.

I got about half way where it plateaued a bit and you can’t see over the edge unless you’re standing at it.

Well, that’s where things changed.

Up until that point, I could see the terrain I was navigating, but this terrain ahead was one I could not see…until now.

Since I had never done this run before, Dave had never told me about it since I never thought I’d be doing it, and you can’t really tell from the lift what it’s like – even though you better believe I scoped it out on the way up JUST in case this rabbit girl decided to do something REALLY out of the ordinary, I didn’t know how it flowed.

Now I did.

At this point where I stood looking over the edge, it was REALLY steep. Not that the rest of it hadn’t been, as the past me would never have wanted down any of what I just came through.

Okay, this is what Black Diamond means. The next section I had to get down, to me, seemed as if it was nearly vertical.

Now, if this had been me at any other moment but this day, especially the me from before this season or even a few weeks ago, this is the kind of run I would have either sat down and cried about, refused to do and taken my skis off and shimmied down, or would have had a few unpleasant, terrifying falls from – all the while being petrified even to move. So all that I just said may have just played out in my mind like a horror movie while I remained frozen.

Not only was I standing at this crazy edge, but I was without Dave near by in case I fell and needed help up – as falling on steep runs is REALLY hard to get up from on your own.

But, the Black Rabbit was with me or perhaps WAS me. The Water Rabbit who rules this realm and knows just how to flow with it.

It just so happened that nobody came down this hard part while I was facing it and so it was like a time-out-of-time present that opened up just to encapsulate me in this momentous experience.

I didn’t stand there for more than a minute and away I went, as I knew if I overthought it, that wasn’t going to help me. I had to lean into trusting myself.

But I was not without a racing rabbit heart going faster than ever before and some really hard breathing. I instinctively got low like a rabbit and tucked into my turns, finding myself moving through them pretty fluidly. I wasn’t able to go the really slow speed I usually like to do, because of the steepness, so I had to just keep going, staying on high alert with all parts of me in synchronized coordination, and…trust.

My heart raced faster and faster…the fastest I’ve ever felt it…and I knew I really was a rabbit in these moments. I was feeling that rush of adrenaline that rabbits do when the fight or flight hormone kicks in and increases their heart rate like crazy.

But I kept going and even though fear was acknowledged to be hanging out, my higher self took over and held fear’s hand. Rather than fear leading, another part of me took over the reins and said, “not this time – I got this.”

Who was that? It was an unfamiliar voice and presence. Very different than even the one that has gotten me through other things in the past. This voice had a power, but grace…ungraspable, yet oddly grounded, and almost hovering in the in between.

I felt buoyant on the snow, like it was keeping me afloat, and not once did my skis catch a falter. Tuck and turn, tuck and turn. My heart continuing to race at a rate that seemed inhuman or at least not capable of being sustained in a human body. It was rapid like the speed of light pulsing through me and that IS me.

I thought I might have gone out of body during this part of the experience, but in fact I now feel that a switch was flipped into the next phase of me – my Capricorn North Node light went on and it took over like cruise control while my racing heart became the catalyst.

It went so fast, like I might die from how fast, that it actually tripped a switch and made this moment, THE time.

I leapt into the vortex of the unknown and came out the black hole into a whole new world or what felt like one, looking through new eyes. I literally felt like I had traveled through a near death experience, similar to one I’ve already had, where a new me emerges from the experience.

I got to the bottom of that super steep part and stopped to the side, while other skiers and boarders came down behind me. I felt strange, in a good way. Not myself, but more myself. My heart was still racing and my body was integrating what took place. I actually stood there on my skis for a good five minutes before moving again. I kept looking at the run I’d just come down, feeling what this world felt like with all of my new parts, as if I’d just landed here from another planet.

I acknowledged the present and voiced deep gratitude.

This was my view of the bottom part of that run with violet light streaming through the trees. Again, a much more skewed perspective than what it really is.

There was an almost shock-like peace within me, unable to comprehend what just happened, but also knew explanation would pale to the actual experience. I just kept standing there, breathing and allowing my heart to return to a more normal pace, integrating the energy that had fully emerged from the birth canal and was feeling out the landscape of this new capsule it arrived in, and continuing to look at the run behind me – where I left an old piece of myself.

It all sounds kind of dramatic for what is quite a normal experience for many people, but things some take for granted can be life-shifting for others – it’s all relative and any moment can be a hinge-point to someone when things are in alignment.

I can’t really explain what happened on the mountain that day, but whether one understands what took place for me or not, there’s a bottom line to what I do know and that is, I got down the hardest, steepest run of my life without incident – a Black Diamond.

I had only once done a Black Diamond when we were on our ski safari in Colorado, but it was considered an easy Black that was more Blue (the reason I did it). And I didn’t get down it quite like I did now.

That was the ending to my day, as I felt no more need to do more. I simply kept breathing in the reality of what took place.

I’d gone up the mountain one person, and came down the mountain quite another person.

When I shared what I’d done with Dave he was wowed and expressed how proud he was of me – big time! He even mentioned that he couldn’t believe I got down that bottom part. He told me that even when he gets to that part, he’ll stop to make sure others aren’t around and that he changes the way he skis between the first part and the end, as the steepness calls for a different approach.

That all spoke to what my rabbit instincts had kicked in to do on their own.

When messaging with my sweet Capricorn friend KC who has been my Cappy hand-holder – she’s the one who got me up and down the Grand Canyon steep ledges – I said:

“Holy cecotropes!” – (for those of you who aren’t rabbit parents or know about this, these are cecal pellets or partially digested food/nutrient-packed dietary items that rabbit’s pass to eat and are essential to good health – they look like poop/feces, but aren’t) 😉 And continued to share what I did, to which she responded in part with:

“Oh my gosh who even are you?!! Wow! Good freaking job T!!! Lucky rabbit year!! Woot woot!!”

And she was right, who was this person who just did that?!

A new T indeed.

And how auspicious to have this take place just before I step into my 50th year.

Black Rabbit Birthday Bonanza indeed!

Taking things to a whole new level….again….and getting my Cappy ON!

So much keeps coming together seamlessly, including the matching energy of things here at home to create the space supportive of my new home I’ve landed in within.

My office/shared Wonderland room with Astrid has shifted a lot with the new gridding of crystals and especially a new INCREDIBLE addition to the family who sits to my right (I may share about her another time), while Astrid sits by my feet – where they both are as I type this. I’m awaiting the arrival of some special crystal babies that have appeared in dreams for my birthday to share with Astrid and the rest of our little family here to support this new cycle.

Interestingly, the day after my leap down the mountain, quite the visitor leapt into my experience.

On the morning of 2/8 I was enjoying breakfast when I heard Boojum, our black cat, making odd howls and chirps behind me. I turned and found him sitting by the window, looking down. I knew he was seeing something, so I got up to look at what it might be.

When I peered down at the snow covered yard I found a very plush and healthy looking messenger. She looked half fox and half coyote, so it was hard for me to tell at first which she was. Even that tail of hers was so fox, but I’m pretty sure it was a coyote although love that she felt like a hybrid. Her coat had a lot of tawny red in it and then smaller areas of tannish gray. I did read that coyotes can be strawberry blond and this one was definitely that. But it wasn’t only the way she looked, but the way she acted that REALLY got my attention.

She looked up and saw me, then almost like a little elf, she immediately turned with glee and literally bounced with joyful and graceful leaps, as if the snow underneath her was a cloud she pranced upon. I have never seen a coyote do this. She bounced in big strides with all fours touching the snow at once, just like you see deer prance and bounce along a field or a rabbit binky effortlessly. It was as if her feet barely touched the snow before she sprang up and out again. And she continued this for yards upon yards with no change in her gait.

It was quite the sight and so rare, because not only have I not seen this, but never seen a coyote in our yard since we have a fence. But the snow level is so high that there’s only inches to a foot between the levels on either side of the fence. So this coyote literally bounced her way in and out.

She was light as a feather and buoyant as can be, as I watched her bounce her way across the yard, then over the fence, and continue bouncing all the way into the forest. There was so much lightness, softness, and yet power in her energy. She had the presence of a shapeshifter who was much more than meets the eye and used Boojum to alert me of her arrival.

I only wish I had videoed it because it was fantastic! And it was like a living experience that mirrored the exuberant golden bear of my dream who wanted to share that powerful, alchemical joy with everyone. Wow!

Coyotes, of course, do symbolize playfulness in life, fluidity, and even sudden changes. I’ve read that they appear when you’re being initiated into the next phase of spiritual growth.

I later noticed that she had visited my office, and perhaps looked in on Astrid, as her paw prints led to our room.

I managed to grab my phone as she made it to the edge of the forest. And once she was hidden in the trees, she stopped her bouncing. You can catch a glimpse of her in the distance below.

She actually turned back before disappearing altogether, as if to make sure I got the message.

Later that night, as I drove down the mountain to pick up Dave at the airport, I saw another odd sighting. It was a small mouse running across the highway to the other side in the dark cold. She literally shot across and my headlights lit her up nearly like an apparition, as she safely reached the snow.

The sense I got was that from the dark abyss of pure innocence, something new and fresh was springing forth. It may seem small at first, but the impact potential was fertile and rich.

And all of these recent experiences feel to echo what I wrote about the heart chakra and love in a recent blog post:

Love always awaits our presence. And it’s not a fluffy kind of love, but a unifying cosmic force that both hovers in a space in between and dances like crystalline snowflakes all around the energy field – potent, but untethered, grounded, but mutable, still, but boldly all-encompassing even in the tiniest of reflections.

I found this heart in the snow a few days ago on our deck – a grounded heart made out of pure, mutable, frozen water. It also happens to mirror the energy of a dream, and a nearly exact looking crystal that’s on its way to me through some wild synchronicities.

Life definitely keeps reflecting the infinite potentials available, even when we think there couldn’t possibly be more, that there isn’t another way, or that something seems impossible.