Two nights ago this precious soul’s journey became entwined with mine. Fiver is his name, which immediately came to me when I embraced my role as his guardian, caregiver, and bridge worker to support his soul’s choices. The name, Fiver, comes from a favorite story of mine – Watership Down – the name of a fragile, but powerfully gifted rabbit with psychic insight who initiates the journey of his fellow rabbits of the warren to their safety and freedom with his gift of vision and sixth sense. Five also happens to be my favorite number since I was a child and the energy it carries of big, swift, and sometimes surprisingly good change is fitting.
Very unfortunately Fiver became badly injured by our cats, but I managed to save him in the middle of the night when I woke and knew what was going on. It was not the first time, as another of this little one’s family was not as lucky about a week or two ago. That first incident took place on an ominous night where we felt a 5.7 earthquake that had rumbled from within Earth 70 miles away, and two large aftershocks. Following the earthquake, the incident with the mouse took place and then I went into a dream awareness state where it felt like a parallel reality had been cracked open by the earthquake and there in our place and walking through our room was a woman with short blonde hair who thought it was her place and didn’t understand why we were there.
This has happened before in our Orange County home where a parallel reality of a man living in our house on another timeline began to appear to me and my rabbit Joy and we would both feel his presence after my night experience of him walking past our bed just like this woman. And I would smell cigarette smoke in my room at various occasions when there was none. My room in that home seemed to be the nucleus and portal, which became apparent when I hung my painting, Once in a Blue Moon, on the wall of my two rabbits, Nestor and Joy, and that same night I woke seeing elves, faeries, gnomes and the like crawling out of it and running through the house.
Needless to say, shifts continue here and two nights ago Fiver was part of another one when he decided to emerge….likely, in part, he came in to seek warmth and food, but he and I have discovered much more of our connection through this sad yet seemingly deliberate unfolding.
Little Fiver was quite traumatized, as you can imagine, and badly injured on his lower half of the body, unable to use his back legs (not sure if his lower back was also injured or just his legs), which reminded me right away of my sweet rabbit Cosmo.
I immediately made him a warm, soft bed in a cookie tin that first night and put some food in it for him.
I found it amazing that at one point yesterday he was sitting up and I watched as he placed one hand over one of his legs that was injured (and exactly where there appeared to be a bruise/darkened area at his joint), and then his other little human-like hand over the other far worse off leg.
I swear he was giving himself Reiki or at the very least was trying to heal and ease the pain in his legs. Incredible!
The next morning (today) he was still with us and had moved to the opposite side of the tin, ate a bit, and pooped. I helped prop him up and gave him more fresh food. He seemed to love bread crumbs the best and heartily ate and drank for the first half of the day and pooped and peed. That was a good sign.
He was still very anxious, but after giving him a lot of Reiki and others sending him some too, he seemed to calm down nicely and then went into a slumber, only stirring a bit here and there. He seemed to be slowing down and needing to rest. I felt he was in preparation and the energy had provided him the peace to be able to process everything and get to a centered place.
I had called the wildlife care facility up here as soon as they opened in the morning yesterday, who provided me my slim options. They said, in all honesty, with wild mice that are brought in, they will euthanize them and feed them to the hawks and falcons they have in their care there, as normally they buy mice for this. Or, I could care for him.
While the euthanizing part sounded like a potentially peaceful option, if Fiver wanted that, the rest he picked up on and it felt traumatizing to him (despite being part of the circle of life) so when I checked in with him he gave me an immediate “no”.
The situation in general, with the cats, the idea of the hawks (spirit guides of mine as well) all again reiterated the nature of things, but also helped me to continue deepening with this and heal more of the natural tendencies to judge it. As while I embrace it, understand, and know the bigger picture, a part of me knows this “nature” has evolved and wasn’t always “the way”. There’s no coincidence as to why I am drawn to rabbits (and also have had tortoises), as it feels more to be of this harmony, and yet I continually draw more to me that invites wholeness regardless of the human reality I am involved in currently.
To truly love, one must love all the ways that All That Is expresses loving itself.
Anyway, upon further inquiry with Fiver, and presenting him his options, he opted wanting to stay with me and receive the love and comfort, which to him outweighed the pain.
I wholeheartedly supported him and he’s been with me ever since.
I spent most of my entire day yesterday caring for him and being with this “heaven on earth” majesty all around me that was so surreal it overwhelmed me and was the perfect essence to blanket us in, not to mention created such a beautiful world for little Fiver to experience – or was it that his energy and our connection was being mirrored in our surroundings?
It was a day of stillness and peace.
And I enjoyed seeing him enjoy his food and feeling cared for.
I’ve checked in time and time again and he continues to want to stay. It’s my commitment to honor his guidance above all else, knowing the importance of honoring a soul’s wishes, as well as the path that has been chosen between contracts made in the bigger picture, overall.
I kept him fed, gave him water which he also sipped, and had him next to me all day no matter where I was, giving him love, Reiki, and little rubs as he slept.
I wasn’t sure he would make it through the night, but did have him next to me to sleep, alongside all of my crystals to support him. Nestor, Joy, Gaia, and Cosmo, my loves who have transitioned already, have been supporting the process and await him whenever he decides, to help guide him lovingly on the other side.
Between all of us we have a bridge created to assist him on both ends and this is part of the message I’ve continued to received with all I’ve experienced with my animal companions and all of the animals that cross my path and come into my life, is that I am one who is here to help animals cross over and I’ve been in “training” so to speak to fully embody the unconditionally compassionate and detached place where I can love them fully, deepen my communication with them, and do what is in their best interests and highest good solely.
And this has deepened my connection to how much my soul is invigorated by the exchange and care I am blessed to give and have with these beautiful and powerful souls in animal bodies. Animals are everything to me and to have the honor of this place in supporting their transitions and soul path choices is one I do not take lightly, but fully embrace with overflow of love.
It is also in preparation for a near future-me manifestation that is in process of coming to be step-by-step.
But, as mentioned, there are layers to Fiver being with me. And one connection is with Cosmo, since he is very much reflecting the same special needs that he did.
I had to take a break, as little Fiver has just passed right next to me as I’ve been writing of this beautiful experience with him.
I will continue now….I needed time to support that, honor the moment and him, and do the energy work to help. Oh, such sweetness he’s brought.
It seemed as if last night that could have transpired, but his strength amped up this morning, despite not wanting to eat. It felt like he was testing out his limitations as he was deciding and that he had been doing soul searching last night, as well as receiving all of the support from those guiding him and the crystals.
Fiver had refused all food and water this morning, but kept wanting me to rub him and comfort him, as his body was starting to prepare.
He moved around quite a bit and his body started looking much better and rejuvenated, his eyes keeping open rather than closed like they were pretty much all day and night before, and even had used one of his legs, which was not possible before.
I’d placed a small quartz point in with him, as well as a black tourmaline.
I kept him close and kept comforting him, never more than inches from him at all times.
A friend, literally minutes before his passing, had offered to do some gentle Qigong for bruising and broken bones. He was open to this. I understand now why he wanted it.
Suddenly, he had begun to move around looking more like his mouse self, but filled with peace and strength…and he got up on all fours, which he had not been able to do, although was trying all morning, walked a bit, then was able to push off his back legs and do a little mouse jump a few inches forward.
Incredibly, where he jumped was DIRECTLY over and centered above the tiny quartz point I had placed in there – the point facing toward his head and almost like he was riding a crystalline rocket to the Cosmos, as you can see here (I was so wow’d I’d immediately grabbed my camera, as it was incredulous).
He was alert, beautiful, and stood there exhibiting his fullness and how he once used to look for about a half to three quarters of a minute with his once limp legs now holding him strongly.
Both Dave and I had witnessed this. And then he suddenly went stiff and his spirit left, leaving him to sink softly upon the quartz point – his resting place and conduit to travel to the Beyond.
I knew he was gone.
It was without struggle, without noise or anquish, it was without any feeling of stress…It was simply like he literally was whole, released from pain,had a surge of energy, and took to flight, just as I’d seen earlier with a Raven that had messaged me outside the window and did the same.
I gently picked him up and placed him in my palm with my other loosely around him. I blessed him, did energy with his Chakras, and guided him to his friends awaiting him.
I placed him for now gently in his bed and covered him with a little cloth blanket. I will prepare a proper burial for him.
He looked and felt like a little, precious angel in my hands and his body had completely rejuvenated…his fur looking so lovely in comparison to the day before and his limp, lifeless legs looking strong in the position he now came to rest in.
What an honor. What a gift. What a healing and soul embodiment he has provided.
I had missed caring for my little ones and Fiver returned that deep soul joy and love I had an empty space with. And with the clarity he helped me to anchor and realize within myself and how this is my path and will continue, I feel this greater peace and wholeness…a deep healing and soul retrieval once again.
This dear little mouse, who had his own path I assisted, and lavishing him with love and comforts he’d never known, helped me into expanding bigger by claiming parts of who I am and affirming I’m on path.
Avia Venefica shares about Symbolic Mouse Meaning:
“Our ancient ancestors observed their affinity for ground-burrowing, and likened this to mice being ‘one with the Mother’ (Mother Earth, that is). This ground-loving behavior was also seen as a connection to the Underworlds (or Otherworlds, depending upon your source of reference). This kind of connection makes the mouse a kind of mediator between physical life and recycling life (spirit energies in transition). This Earth and Underworld connection continues in western, medieval Europe, where folk superstitions tell of mice possessing the ability to carry souls of humans who have passed from this physical life.
In Native North American Indian symbolism, tribes such as the Navajo established the mouse having governance over the southern quadrant of their medicine wheel, which represents a macrocosmic view of life. The southern quadrant of the medicine wheel holds sacred tenets such as new beginnings, connection with the Mother (Nature/Earth). It also represents youthfulness and innocence. Because the mouse is quite modest, and connected so closely with the Mother Earth, it has gained great prominence in this and other branches of Native wisdom.
Mice are incredibly prolific, as mentioned earlier, and can bear up to a dozen pups every four to six weeks. That’s a lotta mice. This is symbolic of fertility, abundance, and expansion. For example, a mouse in your awareness could be symbolic of your ability to mass-produce new births in the form of new ideas, development, creativity, social connections – any number of opportunities are available for us to give birth often and abundantly, the mouse is a reminder of that.”
All of this rings in for me on more levels than I can express here since it would make this a very long post.
Fiver definitely whispered many things to my heart and soul and the symbolism of his tiny, but mighty mouse soul spoke deeply in a way only one so innocent and pure could for me.
Mice also remind us of being ultra aware, seeing what is right before us, and then to take action in alignment with that. They want us not to neglect things we might overlook, nor to scatter our energy, and to stay aware of everything going on to avoid dangers and pitfalls. In this way we can get ultra focused. In this way they are showing us the path to the bigger things, by focusing on and discerning the little things in the moment, adapting, and remaining determined.
Thank you Fiver, for the sweetness you embody, for the love and healing that you nurtured my heart with, for the confirmation of my role, for reaffirming and keeping me laser focused on the path I’m now on, and for infusing abundant inspiration to the prolific creative projects I have in the works.
You are honored and will be physically missed, but I am grateful to have you as a soul guide joining with the rest of our family, that is now yours too.
To hold you Fiver in my hands – so beautiful that you are – and caress your cheeks, head, and injured, fragile little perfectly imperfect body was like touching an angel’s wings.
You are my angel of hope sweet Fiver, forever more.